jokes!
- Thread starter sam1995
- Start date
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Dave5N
Über Member
- Location
- Outside The Little Nibble
What's orange and sounds like a parrot?
Dave5N
Über Member
- Location
- Outside The Little Nibble
What's brown and sticky?
Dave5N
Über Member
- Location
- Outside The Little Nibble
A carrot
Dave5N
Über Member
- Location
- Outside The Little Nibble
Hear about the magic tractor?
Dave5N
Über Member
- Location
- Outside The Little Nibble
A stick!
Dave5N
Über Member
- Location
- Outside The Little Nibble
It drove down the road and turned into a field.
jimbob
New Member
- Location
- Far, far southwest Cornwall
I opened the door and then it was
A jar.
A jar.
beanzontoast
Guru
- Location
- South of The Peaks
How does Good King Wenceslas like his pizzas?
Deep pan, crisp and even.
Deep pan, crisp and even.
Tetedelacourse
New Member
- Location
- Rosyth
A man goes to the doctor seeking help for a terrible flatulence problem. As he sits down, the doctor says "Tell me, what seems to be the... GOOD GOD MAN YOU STINK, GET OUT".
Tetedelacourse
New Member
- Location
- Rosyth
Festive:
Santa goes to the doctor seeking help for a terrible flatulence problem. As he sits down, the doctor says "Tell me Santa, what seems to be the... GOOD GOD MAN YOU STINK, GET OUT".
Santa goes to the doctor seeking help for a terrible flatulence problem. As he sits down, the doctor says "Tell me Santa, what seems to be the... GOOD GOD MAN YOU STINK, GET OUT".
Blackandblue
New Member
- Location
- London
The boss of a big company needed to call one of his employees about an urgent problem with one of the main computers.
He dialed the employee's home phone number and was greeted with a child's whispered voice on the first ring, "Hello?"
Feeling put out at the inconvenience of having to talk to a youngster the boss asked, "Is your Daddy home?".
"Yes.", whispered the small voice.
"May I talk with him?", the man asked.
To the surprise of the boss, the small voice whispered, "No."
Wanting to talk with an adult, the boss asked, "Is your Mommy there?".
"Yes.", came the whispered answer.
"May I talk with her?".
Again the small voice whispered, "No."
Knowing that it was not likely that a young child would be left home alone, the boss decided he would just leave a message with the person who should be there watching over the child. "Is there any one there besides you?", the boss asked the child.
"Yes", whispered the child, "A policeman."
Wondering what a cop would be doing at his employee's home, the boss asked, "May I speak with the policeman?".
"No, he's busy.", whispered the child.
"Busy doing what?", asked the boss.
"Talking to Daddy and Mommy and the Fireman.", came the whispered answer.
Growing concerned and even worried as he heard what sounded like a helicopter through the ear piece on the phone the boss asked, "What is that noise?".
"A hello-copper.", answered the whispering voice.
"What is going on there?", asked the boss, now alarmed.
In an awed whispering voice the child answered, "The search team just landed the hello-copper!"
Alarmed, concerned and more than just a little frustrated the boss asked, "What are they doing??"
Still whispering, the young voice replied, "They're looking for me!!"
He dialed the employee's home phone number and was greeted with a child's whispered voice on the first ring, "Hello?"
Feeling put out at the inconvenience of having to talk to a youngster the boss asked, "Is your Daddy home?".
"Yes.", whispered the small voice.
"May I talk with him?", the man asked.
To the surprise of the boss, the small voice whispered, "No."
Wanting to talk with an adult, the boss asked, "Is your Mommy there?".
"Yes.", came the whispered answer.
"May I talk with her?".
Again the small voice whispered, "No."
Knowing that it was not likely that a young child would be left home alone, the boss decided he would just leave a message with the person who should be there watching over the child. "Is there any one there besides you?", the boss asked the child.
"Yes", whispered the child, "A policeman."
Wondering what a cop would be doing at his employee's home, the boss asked, "May I speak with the policeman?".
"No, he's busy.", whispered the child.
"Busy doing what?", asked the boss.
"Talking to Daddy and Mommy and the Fireman.", came the whispered answer.
Growing concerned and even worried as he heard what sounded like a helicopter through the ear piece on the phone the boss asked, "What is that noise?".
"A hello-copper.", answered the whispering voice.
"What is going on there?", asked the boss, now alarmed.
In an awed whispering voice the child answered, "The search team just landed the hello-copper!"
Alarmed, concerned and more than just a little frustrated the boss asked, "What are they doing??"
Still whispering, the young voice replied, "They're looking for me!!"
