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Kids gone to uni and house feels empty

Discussion in 'CycleChat Cafe' started by beanzontoast, 30 Sep 2007.

  1. beanzontoast

    beanzontoast Veteran

    Location:
    South of The Peaks
    For the first time, both our kids have gone off to uni this weekend (one in final year, one in first). We've always been a really close family - both Mrs Beanz and I lost parents as children - and we've enjoyed spending time talking with our offspring, eating together, watching tv, shopping - just ordinary family stuff.

    When we got home from dropping son off today (daughter went yesterday), we didn't know what to do with ourselves! The place is so quiet! No music blaring out of bedrooms, no requests for lifts into town, no sudden needs for this or that item of ironing, no me discovering all the hot water has been used up for baths, no tapping on bedroom doors to wish 'night-night' (or ask for tv's to be turned down so we oldies can get to sleep!) ...

    The funny thing is, we both thought we were pretty immune to getting sentimental about it. Then on the way home, we stopped off for a coffee in the cafe at the park and got into a brief conversation with a mum and dad who were teaching their youngest to ride a bike. Cue opening of memory dam, cue Mrs Beanz suddenly in tears!

    I know it's just another step along life's line, but I've been quite amazed how unsettling I've found it.

    Anyone else had this happen?
     
  2. frog

    frog Guest

    I give you a week before you're chasing each other around the house naked. You think this is bad, wait until they come home. It will feel like you've moved nto a bed-sit on a run-down council estate :biggrin:
     
  3. beanzontoast

    beanzontoast Veteran

    Location:
    South of The Peaks
    We have to wait a whole week?

    :biggrin:

    :biggrin:
     
  4. Maggot

    Maggot Star of BBC 5Lives Ballot Box Brigade

    Location:
    Cheddar
    Look forward though Beanz, in the next few months you have depression, arguments and probably one of you having an affair to look forward to.

    Say hi to the Empty Nest Syndrome:biggrin:
     
  5. Cathryn

    Cathryn California Correspondant

    Of course no-one will have affairs. MAGGOT!!!!!

    If it's any comfort, my parents and I were (and still are) really close and although Mum never admitted it, I think they found the sudden silence hard when I'd gone to uni. But what I've noticed in the 14 (aagh) years since I left home was that their relationship is better than ever, it's like they're a couple again instead of parents, and I love seeing that. I think Frog was right, this is a fantastic new step in your life.
     
  6. domtyler

    domtyler Über Member

    Is it not time to dig the marijuana stash out of the attic?
     
  7. starseven

    starseven Guest

    Wish my kids would go to Uni, at 4 and 11 they may struggle to begin with but would settle after a while. :biggrin:

    At least I would get some peace!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
     
  8. Cycling Naturalist

    Cycling Naturalist Legendary Member

    Location:
    Llangollen
    Slighty worse. My eldest son joined the army and had been in active combat in Afghanistan. At least with universtity, they almost always come back alive and unmaimed.
     
  9. sheddy

    sheddy Veteran

    Location:
    WGC
    Our oldest left for Uni last Sat. Wife wanted to go and see him a week later. Hopefully she'll settle down soon...
     
  10. beanzontoast

    beanzontoast Veteran

    Location:
    South of The Peaks
    Stick with it Sheddy! The oldest will hopefully be a great help in making it easier for your next one when they go - daughter has definitely benefitted from hearing of our son's experiences over his last three years of uni.

    Anyway, Mrs B slept well last night. I think some of the problem was the logistics of getting them off to uni in the first place.

    Hard to believe after all that packing - they only managed to forget a couple of things - daughter has left her phone charger at home and son left his mp3 earphones. Neither Earth-shattering to me, but I'm sure we'll be getting requests to forward them shortly!
     
  11. Globalti

    Globalti Legendary Member

    Must admit I am not looking forward to the day my son leaves. What the hell will my wife and I talk about?
     
  12. beanzontoast

    beanzontoast Veteran

    Location:
    South of The Peaks
    Probably you'll talk about your son, R-R! (for a while at least!).

    I have high hopes of getting Mrs B into more winter cycling than last year - we were talking about that over dinner last evening. Also, I've been saving for a new digital camera so I'm hoping we can get out walking / cycling more, exploring and photographing the countryside and maybe I'll even start a Flickr album...

    ... generally, I expect we'll be talking quite a lot about remembering what it was like before we had kids!
     
  13. ChrisKH

    ChrisKH Shorts Adjustment Expert

    Location:
    Essex
    Yes, also requests for cash.:biggrin:

    I can't imagine what it must be like to pack off your kids. I'm at least 14-15 years off that, even though I'm quite ancient (by comparison to some). I'll just enjoy what's to come over that period.

    Still, as others have said, I'd be swinging from the Chandaliers by now. :biggrin:
     
  14. My parents go heavily into the organic, low-fat, healthy lifestyle when my brother and I had both left. Quinoa cereal anyone???

    I had to move back home for a year after this, so obviously had to buy my own chocolate.
     
  15. JamesAC

    JamesAC Senior Member

    Location:
    London
    Mine too.
    He was in Op Telic, and came back ok. Now he's about to go off to 'Stan. My heart is in my mouth until he returns from his tour.