Lets lighten up a bit :0)

[steveindenmark]

Two bits of tarmac are standing in a bar, discussing who's toughest.

the barman observes this for a good 15 minutes, before the doors burst open.

in walks this green bit of tarmac, and both the others go very quiet and wont make (cat) eye contact.

barman says "whats going on, i thought you two were the toughest bits of tarmac in this town?"

first bit of tarmac replies "yeah, but dont mess with him, he's a kin cyclepath"

 

[biggs682]

 

[numbnuts]

Go and get your coat

 

[Scoosh]

Keep up at the back !

http://www.cyclechat.net/threads/psychopath.145688/post-2825644

http://www.cyclechat.net/threads/any-good-jokes.78142/post-2298130

 

[morrisman]

Two licorice allsorts in a bar discussing who was hardest when a cough sweet walked in, they both shut up. The barman asked why they were so quiet they replied ' We may be hard but he's menthol'

 

[Scoosh]

There is a long-established thread for Any Good Jokes ? which might be a better place for these posts/ this thread ...

 

[Globalti]

A white horse walks into a bar and asks for a whisky. "Hey" says the barman, "we've got a whisky named after you!"

"What?" asks the white horse, puzzled. "Eric?"

 

[Andrew_P]

Woke up this morning with a spoonful of coffee, a spoonful of sugar and some milk in my mouth.
Somebodys treating me like a mug.

 

[Gravity Aided]

Two Accounting students were walking along the path to their cafeteria. The one says to the other,
"Where did you get that great bike?"
The other says
"I was walking along this very same path yesterday when a beautiful young girl in my biology class rides up on this bike,
takes off all her clothes and says,
""Take anything you want"" and that's how I got the bike"
The one says " That's good, the clothes probably wouldn't have fit"

 

[Gravity Aided]

Q: What is the hardest part about learning to ride a bicycle ?
A: The pavement.

 

[Shut Up Legs]

Q: What is the hardest part about learning to ride a bicycle ?
A: The pavement.

I wonder where he got that one from...
http://bicycling.about.com/od/thebikelife/tp/Ten-Best-Bike-Jokes.htm

 

[Andrew_P]

How do you consol someone with bad grammar skills?
There, their, they're.

 

[Andrew_P]

I got into a fight in a Chinese Restaurant last night.
Half an hour later I was angry again.

 

[Gravity Aided]

I wonder where he got that one from...
http://bicycling.about.com/od/thebikelife/tp/Ten-Best-Bike-Jokes.htm

About the oldest cycling joke in the world.

 

[Jon George]

How do you consol someone with bad grammar skills?
There, their, they're.

As an author, this has tickled my funny bone like you wouldn't believe. Thanks! Oh, do you have copyright? I feel the urge to use this quip elsewhere.