men versus women .....

[ComedyPilot]

Map read

 

[ComedyPilot]

Parallel park

 

[ComedyPilot]

Arm wrestle

 

[ComedyPilot]

Cook - properly, fish fingers chips and garden peas twice a week does not a Michelin star maketh...

 

[ComedyPilot]

get drunk and prattle on internet forums.....................

 

[EltonFrog]

Men can get a whiff of other men's farts and laugh. Women can't do that.

 

[Shut Up Legs]

Ask another guy 'How's it hanging?'. Rhetorically, of course.

 

[RWright]

Ask another guy 'How's it hanging?'. Rhetorically, of course.

I asked a lesbian this one time, she replied "low and to the left"

 

[swansonj]

multi task

I'm sorry, could you repeat that please, I was concentrating on something else and wasn't really paying attention?

 

[Mad Doug Biker]

Great term. I shall be using that.

And here I thought you had a dirty mind too, have you never heard that term before?

My whole (whole... hole... geddit? .... Oh never mind) estimation of you has gone down a slot my good sir, sorry!

 

[Mad Doug Biker]

Except for Fnarr of course , I think that Men tend to have dirtier minds!

I know I do - even look at my signature (although it was originally supposed to be a lie).

 

[brodiej]

Women can nurture and multitask, whilst men prefer the more macho colours, power tools and Loaded.

It can be conclusively traced back to differences in the way our brains are "hard wired" due to different evolutionary pressures in the upper paleolithic*

Read all about it in my book "Why women can't read maps while men can't crochet" available self published on Amazon

* This is especially true if you are very gullible

 

[biggs682]

Except for Fnarr of course , I think that Men tend to have dirtier minds!

I know I do - even look at my signature (although it was originally supposed to be a lie).

caused by us spending to much time alone locked in our man cave keeping out of the way of the stressy females in the house

 

[Peteaud]

Feelings

for example


WOMAN'S DIARY

28 July 2012 Saturday


Saw him in the evening and he was acting really strangely.

I'd been shopping in the afternoon with the girls and was a bit late
meeting him, thought it might be that.

The bar was really crowded and loud, so I suggested we go somewhere
quieter to talk.

He was still very subdued and distracted so I suggested we went
somewhere nice to eat.

All through dinner he just didn't seem himself - he hardly laughed and
didn't seem to be paying any attention to me or to what I was saying, I just knew that something was wrong.

He dropped me back home and I wondered if he was going to come in, He
hesitated but followed.

I asked him what was wrong, but he just half shook his head and turned
the television on.

After about ten minutes of silence I said that I was going upstairs to
bed, I put my arms around him and told him that I loved him deeply, He
just gave a sigh and a sad sort of smile.

He didn't follow me up immediately but came up later and, to my surprise, we made love - but he still seemed distant and a bit cold.

I cried myself to sleep - I think he's planning to leave me - maybe he's found someone else.

------------

MAN'S DIARY:

Saturday 28 July

Need new bottom bracket

 

[Shortmember]

Women use public restrooms mainly to catch up on gossip with their friends while they 'powder their noses'.
Men just use them to take a p*ss, and never invite their mates to join them.