DCLane
Found in the Yorkshire hills ...
- Location
- Dewsbury, West Yorkshire
Easy ... hang your clothes all round and wait for it to rain.
You going shining up yer buttons?Throw Andy Burnham in the mix, and we'll have ourselves a nice little Basho.![]()
and go back upstairs to do some writing. Managed to get a good tranche done, further fleshing out the outline for a forthcoming chapter, as well as editing what I wrote yesterday. One of the characters in this forthcoming chapter is based on an ex of mine, who annoyed a writer and is now going to be put in a book and get their come-uppance LOL.You going shining up yer buttons?


My bike has cobwebs on. Have not been out all week.
Life stuff, mostly other peoples, bunging up my life.
Have done my tax return whilst hanging on to calls to help centres. Bloody " thank you for reaching out" tosh. Mostly "We've had your money, now ckaaf off" would ring more true.
Scroat on fleaVay trying to screw be out of £2,75. Deliver what i ordered you little twonk! Then I'll leave you alone.
Now I'm signed up to verge for a wedding. These range from the sublime right through to a remake of Dante's inferno.
This one seemed a walk in the park. Now it's more like Rosemary's baby.
Rehearsal booked for 1500. Pained call earlier this week could we re arrange to 1630, OK.
Then its 1600, so I turn up at 1545.
Someone else has the key. Then the " I thought you were getting the key" back and forth but still no key.
Key arrives 1600, everyone there except the bloke who's donating the bride.
He turns up at 1630 with the " they told me it was a 1630 job. Can we hurry up, I've got a fare to Gatwick at 1715?"
Now I learn they want a different sound setup. Someone has left only flat batteries in the system.
I know the Bluetooth microphone won't operate from the gate to announce the arrival of the bride. Can I trust them with the walkie talkie, with the "roger bleep" off, to cue the arrival music.
Have you timed this walk?
Why?
Well, how long is the walk and is the copyright infringed track long enough?
Oh!
Where's the music? The groom asked a mate to sort it.
He's bringing it? Yes.
When?
Oh, it'll be here tomorrow.
Who's dealing with doing this?
You!
Then the groom gets all emotional and starts blubbing as the rehearsal goes on
For sound I can wire the vicar. And she won't fiddle with the kit.
But the lady doing the prayers will only arrive just before the service, so no time to wire her.
I know she can't be trusted with a handheld.
Now a mike stand has to slip into place and then set the level from somewhere else.
Also, now there's a singer for the signing of the register.
Does she want, need a mike?
Don't know, we can ask her when she arrives.
When's that?
Just before the service
Who's the accompanist?
No! She'll bring a memory stick.
Who's doing the tech for that then?
You!?
The vicar remarked as we left that I'd been a bit short with the party
