My best friend keeps sending dating info...

[tyred]

I've been through the entire spectrum from spending most of my 20s super-depressed and basically as a recluse, then sorting my shoot out, finding a social life at long last, desperate to meet someone, met someoene who seemed ideal and appeared interested but but wasn't actually interested,* online dating attempts that went nowhere ** have filled my life with Salsa classes, Salsa socials, writing classes, yoga classes and now trying Akido I wonder would I even have time for a relationship at the moment and am happier than I have ever been but still open to the idea if the right person comes along.

I went through a period of seeing couples everywhere and feeling really unhappy about it but have come to realise a lot of these apparently loving couples aren't actually that happy at all.

* as a follow on to a previous thread I started, we still remain close friends and see each other a lot. I've heard of friends with benefits but we seem to be a couple without the benefits. What have I done wrong

** Why when you message someone on an online dating site, write a nice email, explain yourself, ask questions you get half a line of text speak back? Have people lost the art of communication

 

[Smurfy]

Stuff it! Just have fun on your own*. That's what I do.

* I don't mean actually on your own, I mean with other like-minded people.

 

[snorri]

Being happy and single now is no guarantee that you will be happy and single in later life.

There are no guarantees of happiness in life.

Edited after ColinJ caused me to give the matter a little more thought

 

[Yellow Fang]

What's an ASL, honky?

I know VPL stands for visible panty line.

 

[ColinJ]

There are no guarantees in life.

I can think of one - death (eventually)!

 

[Smurfy]

I can think of one - death (eventually)!

.... and taxes

 

[tyred]

Being happy and single now is no guarantee that you will be happy and single in later life. Look at Numbnuts.

Indeed. Although I am generally perfectly happy with my life at the moment the one cloud of doom that keeps floating through my head follows on from a conversation with a family friend in his late 50s who survived bowel cancer last year as he told me the only thing that got him through the recovery was the support of his wife and (grown up) children.

I can't help worrying that whenever it comes to my turn to face a life-threatening illness, I'll be facing it alone. I know a lot of people through Salsa and other things nowadays but they aren't really friends - just people I say hello to when I see them and we know little or nothing about each other.

 

[Mo1959]

Indeed. Although I am generally perfectly happy with my life at the moment the one cloud of doom that keeps floating through my head follows on from a conversation with a family friend in his late 50s who survived bowel cancer last year as he told me the only thing that got him through the recovery was the support of his wife and (grown up) children.

I can't help worrying that whenever it comes to my turn to face a life-threatening illness, I'll be facing it alone. I know a lot of people through Salsa and other things nowadays but they aren't really friends - just people I say hello to when I see them and we know little or nothing about each other.

This is definitely one of the drawbacks must admit. Apart from my elderly Dad, I only have a brother who is married and a neice and nephew. They are only about 40 miles away but have their own lives and we really only see each other a few times a year for birthdays, christmas, etc. I have been blessed with a lovely neighbour/friend next door who ferried me to hospital appointments and helped with the dog when I first broke my collar bone. Not sure how I would have managed to be honest.

 

[Pat "5mph"]

I worry about this too, in a vague way ... certainly makes me more cautious when out cycling, as I know I'll be left unable to do basic tasks for myself if injured.
Actually dying is no worries at all, my cat will be taken care of
Mind, a long term relationship is not going to guarantee one comfort in old age.
Partners can die or can become incapacitated, or, worse, can trade you in with a younger model
Nothing in life is assured!

 

[Saluki]

.... and taxes

and the Blue Screen of Death.

If you are happy going along as you are, carry on. I wasn't looking for anyone when I got together with Hubster. Not quite sure what happened there. One minute he was my best friend and then.....
If you are happy to meet someone, I know of several folks who met their OHs online - there a lot of scumbags and scammers out there though. People have a habit of shipping up in your life when you least expect it. Just be open to the idea and I'm sure that you will recognise a prospective partner when they pop up.

 

[333]

Simple answer is continue as you are, you said you are happy single etc so continue that way why be swayed by a pool of other people who are experiencing a different life to you.

 

[Smurfy]

and the Blue Screen of Death.

Only if you're a Windoze user

If you are happy going along as you are, carry on. I wasn't looking for anyone when I got together with Hubster. Not quite sure what happened there. One minute he was my best friend and then.....
If you are happy to meet someone, I know of several folks who met their OHs online - there a lot of scumbags and scammers out there though. People have a habit of shipping up in your life when you least expect it. Just be open to the idea and I'm sure that you will recognise a prospective partner when they pop up.

I've got so many different interests, and so little time, I think I'd struggle with a relationship

 

[BigonaBianchi]

I feel exactly the same. After a long relationship that ended 6 years ago Ive been single. I work on the basis that one day the right lady may 'show up' but until then im happy getting on with my own life. My 'new' life takes me to new places, often wonderful, sometimes lonely, mostly fun!

The right person will show up, likely where you are least expecting him to to. Forget about web dates....too many spiders.

 

[vernon]

Only if you're a Windoze user


I've got so many different interests, and so little time, I think I'd struggle with a relationship

Wouldn't it be better to have so many different relationships and so little time that you'd struggle with an interest?

 

[Saluki]

Wouldn't it be better to have so many different relationships and so little time that you'd struggle with an interest?

Then you'd be branded as a gadabout and a tad dull, surely.