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NON PC - Homophobic/Irish joke...

Discussion in 'CycleChat Cafe' started by yenrod, 11 Apr 2008.

  1. yenrod

    yenrod Guest

    Shamus and Murphy fancied a pint or two but didn't have a lot of money
    between them, they could only raise the staggering sum of one Euro.

    Murphy said "Hang on, I have an idea."

    He went next door to the butcher's shop and came out with one large
    sausage.

    Shamus said "Are you crazy? Now we don't have any money left at all!"

    Murphy replied, "Don't worry - just follow me."

    He went into the pub where he immediately ordered two pints of Guinness
    and two glasses of Jameson Whisky.

    Shamus said "Now you've lost it. Do you know how much trouble we will be
    in? We haven't got any money!!"

    Murphy replied, with a smile. "Don't worry, I have a plan, Cheers!"

    They downed their Drinks. Murphy said, "OK, I'll stick the sausage
    through my zipper and you go on your knees and put it in your mouth."

    The barman noticed them, went berserk, and threw them out.

    They continued this, pub after pub, getting more and more drunk, all for
    free.

    At the tenth pub Shamus said "Murphy - I don't think I can do any more
    of this. I'm drunk and me knees are killin'me!"

    Murphy said, "How do you think I feel? I lost the sausage in the third
    pub.
     
  2. twentysix by twentyfive

    twentysix by twentyfive Clinging on tightly

    Location:
    Over the Hill
    Groan :biggrin:
     
  3. Maz

    Maz Guru

    There was this Englishman, Jamaican and a Pakistani in a pub...










    ...what a joyous example of racial harmony!
     
  4. alecstilleyedye

    alecstilleyedye nothing in moderation Staff Member

    if the pakistani was in the pub, i assume he was on the orange juice :biggrin:
     
  5. yoyo

    yoyo Senior Member

    Don't you mean Seamus and Murphy? Shamus is phonic English!

    Mr Yoyo and I are originally from Dublin. I read the OP to him and he is still screaming with laughter.
     
  6. longers

    longers Veteran

    Wasn't Patrick going to try this ruse with Arch a bit back?
     
  7. Maz

    Maz Guru

    I sometimes have a coke, just for *hic* variety.;)
     
  8. simonali

    simonali Über Member

    Location:
    Wiltshire
    Seamus and Murphy and their wives decide to do a bit of partner swapping.

    The next morning Seamus says to Murphy "I didn't enjoy that much, I wonder how the girls got on?"
     
  9. Rapples

    Rapples Guru

    Location:
    Wixamtree
    And I thought th joke was going to be about Seamus Fitzmurphy, and Murphy Fitzseamus:biggrin::biggrin::biggrin:
     
  10. yello

    yello Guru

    Just thinking (not in a PC way), is there a reason for them to be Irish? Just curious. The joke doesn't really rely on the stereotype of 'loikes a drink but a bit tick'. Sorry, overly analytical, I know!!
     
  11. Renard

    Renard Guest

    I remember that :smile:
     
  12. bobg

    bobg Über Member

    Location:
    Crosby Merseyside
    I seem to recall that in my early career spending many happing hours boozing and yarning with ships captains of many nationalities, each race gad a similar whipping boy for example Germans --- Frieslanders etc. Not the French of course but then they didnt do humour ..
     
  13. rich p

    rich p ridiculous old lush

    Location:
    Brighton
    Our lovely Brazilian, Luiza, did I mention her before? She says the Brazilians use the Portuguese as their scapegoat in humour. Bit rich, picking on the ancestors!
     
  14. Although there is a point to all the racial elements that needs to be recognised, I think that if it is do in a good natured way then fine but if it is done in a nasty way then it is not.

    As a white English man I do admit that I am not the butt of jokes as much as some but when I am I can't remember ever being offended.

    Germans may call me a "roastbeef" or Jackie Mason may call me a "gentile" but really what is the problem with that?

    I can see the point with Irish jokes giving the whole nation a "thick" label but that is really lazy joke telling, the joke works by the situation not the fact that they are Irish.
     
  15. yello

    yello Guru

    I think so too, hence me wondering. I hasten to add that I don't have a problem with the joke. Equally, I know every nation has its fall guy and it's often quite good natured. It's got me wondering about the French though, I'll ask around and see if they have a nation they like to take the piss out of... I suspect it's the English... and the Germans....