(Non) Relationship advice

[Mrs M]

20 years ago I confessed to a colleague I found another colleague rather handsome Nothing in it though as I was with Mr M, no harm looking though
This colleague left to join the Police and on my 30th birthday I received a framed, signed photograph of "Robbie the Bobby" posing in his uniform, truncheon and handcuffs
Still have the pic in the loft

 

[Tin Pot]

I work in a large mixed workforce, some workers I get on with, some I don't and some I am "tuned into", with the latter I have a huge amount of verbal fun. One woman I particularly get on with, a lot verbal sparring took place every time we met, gentle micky taking and so forth, I looked forward to seeing her which might have been a couple of times a week, or several times a day.

I hadn't seen her for maybe a month (due to shifts) when we met up again 3 weeks ago, I'd missed the verbals, she said she had missed me. Normal verbal sparring resumed and when I left I did something I bitterly regret, I gave her my mobile number and said "Send me a text if you want". Lots of friends there have my number. Well she did, about 2 mins later and since then she hasn't bleedin stopped.

I have horribly misread everything, she saw the mobile number as my green light to her to get a relationship started, but that was never my intention and the last thing I'd want. I may answer one text in ten and ignore her flirtatious ones, but she is like a dog with a bone now and pushing to meet up out of work, l am running out of "busy" excuses.....l really want to unravel the whole thing and get back to how we were, but realise this is not going to be possible, l feel foolish and she is going to feel the same way, she might also be mad as hell too and with retrospect, l wouldn't blame her.

I've decided to ignore texts today and go and speak to her tomorrow , l could do with some advice on how to word things. At 53 l thought this sort of problem was well behind me.

Just give her one, stop complaining.

 

[Tin Pot]

We're ALL waiting with baited breath.

Hope it works out positively for you.

Yeah, and remember - if there's no pics, it never happened.

 

[doog]

Show her your ring mate

..perhaps not

 

[MarkF]

Hey, you were flirting, and looking forward to the flirt too!

Both parties actively not mentioning each others family commitments when "having a banter"?
Both parties are flirting.

No. I wasn't flirting, I know (at 53) how to do that, if she was doing so, I missed it. I didn't actively mention family commitments but why should I? I wouldn't do so to a male staff member who I "got on with".

 

[ChrisV]

Yeah, short, brunette and plain is fine. No danger there!!

If you want my advice, when you see her tell her how great a weekend you had with your wife. Will work a treat.

 

[ChrisV]

We weren't flirting, we were verbal sparring. Your wife will totally get that.

 

[Tin Pot]

No. I wasn't flirting, I know (at 53) how to do that, if she was doing so, I missed it. I didn't actively mention family commitments but why should I? I wouldn't do so to a male staff member who I "got on with".

Literally any interaction with a woman, beyond that office rictus grin, is flirting. 0 on the scale is asking about their weekend/holiday, 1 is offering to get them a coffee - handing over your mobile number and texting each other..?

Man, it's a good job your not an MP.

 

[Pat "5mph"]

No. I wasn't flirting, I know (at 53) how to do that, if she was doing so, I missed it. I didn't actively mention family commitments but why should I? I wouldn't do so to a male staff member who I "got on with".

Sorry, you must work in a different environment.
In my work, everybody talk about their children, grandchildren, cats, mates, partners, ex partners, whatever.
Mind, the job can be very repetitive, we tend to disengage the brain, talk about other things.
Still, imo, you both were flirting
Just mention your wife a couple of times, all will be good, the lady in question will get the gist.

 

[Pat "5mph"]

1 is offering to get them a coffee -

I offer to make coffee to my male (and female) colleagues often.
I am a Barista

 

[MarkF]

Sorry, you must work in a different environment.
In my work, everybody talk about their children, grandchildren, cats, mates, partners, ex partners, whatever.
Mind, the job can be very repetitive, we tend to disengage the brain, talk about other things.
Still, imo, you both were flirting
Just mention your wife a couple of times, all will be good, the lady in question will get the gist.

Nope. There are plenty of women there who I'd happily flirt with if I was single and I have no physical attraction to this woman. We don't work together and a "meeting" might be 1 minute to 5 minute maximum, it's not as if we are sat in an office and interact daily.

She does not get any "gist", she knows I've just got back from holiday with my family, she is now on a mission, I am trying not to drink too much as I formulate my speech............

 

[Pat "5mph"]

She does not get any "gist", she knows I've just got back from holiday with my family, she is now on a mission, I am trying not to drink too much as I formulate my speech............

Just say no, what do you need a speech for?
She is now on a mission, eh?
Uhm, I have the feeling you're not telling the whole story.
Never mind us, tell your wife though, tell her asp.

 

[srw]

Literally any interaction with a woman, beyond that office rictus grin, is flirting.

It must be difficult thinking with your genitals all the time. Try your brain next time.

 

[sarahale]

Has she actually suggested a date?

 

[TVC]

[QUOTE 4450989, member: 76"]I just don't get this bit in bold. How is that his 'out'? If hubby has found the phone then the only thing it is, if it's anything, is a potential kicking

Am I making you feel better [/QUOTE]
Alternatively she could think the idea of a double date might mean swapsies. I did spot the flaw in my plan.