Ode To Serena Williams

[Cyclopathic]

It was in the hope that some twat on a cycling forum might one day use it in a line in a poem thusly

"contents of my ball sack"

Something must have passed me by.

 

[threebikesmcginty]

/* enters boring pedantic old fart mode /*
Point of order but an ode should have the rhyming scheme ABABCDECDE
/* exits boring pedantic old fart mode /*

Tyred was a bit of a pedant
Some said he was actually a real c***
If you didn't use rhyming scheme ABABCDECDE
He'd punch your face in and you'd end up in A&E

 

[rich p]

John Newcombe, John Newcombe,
A perfect gent
Most women into a frenzy, he sent
When in bed with a lover, and before he was spent
A gent like John Newcombe said
No you come, no you come

 

[rich p]

Is it getting any better yet?

No
see above

 

[srw]

/* enters boring pedantic old fart mode /*
Point of order but an ode should have the rhyming scheme ABABCDECDE
/* exits boring pedantic old fart mode /*

Tell that to John Keats, who knew a thing or two about odes
http://www.bartleby.com/106/255.html

SEASON of mists and mellow fruitfulness,
Close bosom-friend of the maturing sun;
Conspiring with him how to load and bless
With fruit the vines that round the thatch-eaves run;
To bend with apples the moss'd cottage-trees, 5
And fill all fruit with ripeness to the core;
To swell the gourd, and plump the hazel shells
With a sweet kernel; to set budding more,
And still more, later flowers for the bees,
Until they think warm days will never cease; 10
For Summer has o'erbrimm'd their clammy cells.

11 lines per stanza: ABABCDEDCCE.

 

[Pro Tour Punditry]

Hana Mandlikova went to bend over
Billie Jean King made a play
Bjorn Borg who was passing
Came over Willander
Mixed doubles ensued for the day.

 

[Pro Tour Punditry]

Yannick Noah, was a real go-er
He bounced his balls through the night
Michael Chang, he could bang
With his exquisite forehand
And they both fancied Ilie Nastase

 

[threebikesmcginty]

Oh @Marmion
You'll soon be gone
Away with Alex et al
Though you'll be independent
The money's already spent
We pissed it all up the wall

 

[Pro Tour Punditry]

Rod Laver's balls
Rod Laver's balls
We've all seen Rod Laver's balls
Jim Courier falls on Rod Laver's balls
Rod Laver's balls are a dream

 

[stephec]

Ooooh look everybody, an ode-off. Haven't had one of those for ages.

Quills at the ready.

 

[twentysix by twentyfive]

/* enters boring pedantic old fart mode /*
Point of order but an ode should have the rhyming scheme ABABCDECDE
/* exits boring pedantic old fart mode /*

Aw crumbs - it's tough enough without having such rules too

 

[threebikesmcginty]

John McEnroe had the Wimbledon title
But he didn't have friends coz he was a shitle

 

[rich p]

Have you ever noticed that many of the East European women players have names that rhyme...
Navratilova, Sharapova, Kournikova, Mandlikova, Hantuchova to name but 5

Seems a hell of a coincidence.

 

[Pro Tour Punditry]

Vitas Gerulaitis, had awful dermatitus
Guy Forget, was a little bit gay
Sebastien Grosjean, seldom went wrong
Thomas Koch.

 

[rich p]

$3m !!!!!!!!
Owed to Serena Williams for winning the US Open