Pretentious waffle please

[subaqua]

Brilliant.

Nah can’t get much less pretensious than

 

[Edwardoka]

Here's a beauty from Vauxhall management...

"The 2019 plan encompasses site compression, implementation of new technologies and other transformation activities which will impact on headcount requirements."

Very forward-thinking of them to make their buildings collapsible like a gasometer.

 

[Yellow Saddle]

Hydrate.

 

[swee'pea99]

From 'yesterday's Guardian:

 

[swee'pea99]

Rich pickings...

 

[Ming the Merciless]

My bike locomotioned up the incline vicariously floated on rare earth elements

 

[NorthernDave]

I purchased a hoodie yesterday and when removing the tags, noted it is "media enabled".
Reading further, "this garment is designed to accommodate media devices and cables" - in other words it has a pocket you can put your phone in with a small hole to feed your headphones cable through...

 

[perplexed]

I walked past one of our local shops earlier. On one of the advertising boards outside, they were offering:


'Hand-tied bouquets available to order'...

'Hand-tied'? What on Earth is that bringing to the party?

 

[Grant Fondo]

Having had several poor line-caught bass and hand-dived scallop dishes i now realise they are either a) covering up the products freshness (hand-paddled in boat then foot-walked from sea to restaurant?) or b) it was stuck in freezer some time after hand catching.

Oh i forgot c) they are just pretentious.

 

[Ming the Merciless]

Optimal power delivery through personalised elliptical chain dimensionally adjusted to an individuals rotational delivery parameters.

 

[Grant Fondo]

Pretty much every line from the BMW 8 series brochure is a pile of pretentious sh*te... can a CC'er who is good at maths do an exponential curve showing that more luxurious/expensive = more preposterous. Just check out the perfume ads at christmas...lunacy!

 

[Andy in Germany]

Pretty much every line from the BMW 8 series brochure is a pile of pretentious sh*te...

How else do you describe a BMW 8 Series (at least while justifying the insame price)?

 

[Drago]

Owners of 5 series and below talk pretentious bollards.

BMW themselves talk pretentious bollards about the 6 series and above.

 

[Ming the Merciless]

BMWs mostly crash into pretentious bollards

 

[Grant Fondo]

How else do you describe a BMW 8 Series (at least while justifying the insame price)?

Not sure its a BMW thing in particular.
In-flight magazines from Ethiad, Emirates etc etc are fertile ground for world record pretentiousness.