Red flags with people?

Kingfisher101

Senior Member
Seriously, though, anyone who spends any time criticising their parents, siblings, friends, neighbours, last partner, employer, etc. Particularly when you first meet them. No one is perfect, and everyone needs to vent at some point, but constant complaining just makes me think that I will soon be the subject of their character assassination attempts soon.
This, there are some lousy horrible people about, but if someone is pulling absolutely everyone to pieces you can be sure that's how they will be speaking about you as well. I've just called time in my head on a new friend who was doing this all the time. I'm not going to bother anymore and just say I'm too busy with family/work etc.
 

Chris S

Guru
Location
Sparkhill
"Socialist Worker?"
 

yello

Legendary Member
Location
France
My wife and I have friends (man and wife) who are often openly criticising each other in our presence. Sure, it's uncomfortable but we take it as a sign that they're comfortable with us. It's a kind of game they have, jousting with each other. She is outspoken, never shy to voice her opinion, and sometimes contrary, with intriguing contradictions (she likes Jeremy Corbyn and Donald Trump, go figure!) He's quick witted and erudite. An evening with them is always entertaining!

I guess my point is that what one might consider a red flag in one context is not in another.
 

Kingfisher101

Senior Member
People who talk about themselves or their family continually and dont even ask how you are. I personally think its very rude for people to talk about their family for more than a minute or two because its very boring for the listener.
 

glasgowcyclist

Charming but somewhat feckless
Location
Scotland
I once phoned a friend at his place of work. He said 'hang on a minute' to me whilst he finished a conversation with his colleague. I have never heard someone I knew be so rude to someone else. Seriously, I was appalled that he could talk to a fellow human being like that.


When I’m at work, my job takes priority over personal calls. If a mate called me at my office while I was in a discussion with a colleague, I’d ask him to call back. Maybe if I was coming to the end of that discussion I’d do the same and say ‘hang on a minute’.

Is it not rude to interrupt someone else’s conversation and expect instant attention?
 

Kingfisher101

Senior Member
When I’m at work, my job takes priority over personal calls. If a mate called me at my office while I was in a discussion with a colleague, I’d ask him to call back. Maybe if I was coming to the end of that discussion I’d do the same and say ‘hang on a minute’.

Is it not rude to interrupt someone else’s conversation and expect instant attention?
The man should have said he would call the friend back really. If it was a work based conversation then this would take priority really. I think the man was being actually rude to the colleague and the listener overheard.
 

Slick

Guru
I spent the week at work interviewing potential candidates for a job and I surprised myself with the types of comments that raised a red flag with me. I soon realised that it was because of a very negative experience with a previous employee and I was looking to avoid a similar personality.
Suppose red flags are like everything else, different for everyone depending on your own circumstances and experiences.
 
to me people who use trendy phrases and seem to believe that they mean something without context are a red flag

I once went to an interview where they were looking for someone who "saw challenges not problems"
WUT??
I explained that I considered seeing a problem to be a positive - better to see it now rather than when you hit it

a challenge give the impression of "Lets all go forward and defeat the enemy"
whereas maybe you are better just finding plan b - maybe at least consider it
or maybe consider the problem and solve it
not just ATTACK

anyway - I didn't get the job

but the concept applies

trite phrases with no depth don't cover up a person who only pretends to believe in something

"I am a feminist" whould be a red flag unless they understand what one is and can discuss it
 
Agree with the waitress and pub test that @Ming the Merciless mentioned as well the fad words and terms test that @ebikeerwidnes mentioned.

I am also careful with those who have no consideration for other people's beliefs, family or work obligations. The type where the universe swirls around them. If "they can do it why not others" approach to life. Order food that they like then ask to go Dutch. "Suggest" a process that suits them. They genuinely think they are the model to follow. Basically a sense of entitlement.
 
The Facebook credentialed individual who runs or has influence in a facebook group. Takes on the persona of an elected councillors or an expert when they have no background or qualification on the subject they are commenting on. Erroneously think their FB group are representative of the wider population.
 

yello

Legendary Member
Location
France
When I’m at work, my job takes priority over personal calls. If a mate called me at my office while I was in a discussion with a colleague, I’d ask him to call back. Maybe if I was coming to the end of that discussion I’d do the same and say ‘hang on a minute’.

Is it not rude to interrupt someone else’s conversation and expect instant attention?
To clarify, and as @Kingfisher101 correctly assumed above, it was the rudeness to his colleague (that I overheard) that took me aback.
 
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