School Bullies

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buggi

Bird Saviour
Location
Solihull
name and shame, call the police, write to your MP and threaten legal action unless they do something. Nip this completely in the bud, and yes, tell your son you will back him if he hits back in self defence (but remember, self defence is only reasonable force! don't let him pummel him to death LOL). One thing i do know about bullies. they bully kids for either being clever or ugly. i was bullied for the latter. classic case of ugly duckling though. i was 5ft when i left school, anorexically skinny, no tits, pale and plain jane. now i'm 6ft, 36 inch leg, great tits even if i do say so myself (still where they are supposed to be, not round my knees) and a lot nicer looking than i was at school which is thanks, i think, to the fact that because i don't sunbathe i look 10 years younger.... so yea, i suppose compared to how they turned out now they're all fat, wrinkly pissed up fag head chavs, i'm pretty much happy that my time has come to look down my nose at them. Very funny the day i told my most hated bully her bloke had just given me his number ha ha. as for those who get bullied for being clever, they always end up richer and better off than their bullies. So tell your son... his time will come!
 
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fossyant

fossyant

Ride It Like You Stole It!
Location
South Manchester
Cheers all.

We have buggered off to the in-laws caravan for the weekend. I shall say nothing about forgetting my waterproof coat, just before the motorway, then driving home, then realising we don't have the key to the caravan by the time we got to Warrington. FFS.

Good job the beer was great at the pub at the site.

The Head Teacher is furious with the kids. We thought an expulsion was needed, but we realise the head said the kids will be in solitary confinement for a week or two, ie you come into school and sit with tHe head or in the staff room. These kids if excluded would see it as an extended holiday.

The high school are also furious, all three kids parents will be interviewed (yup found out it was three kids on to one child).

I am not convinced it will work, but the primary have suggested we sit down with the main kids parents. This might be very dangerous. The lads Dad was very well known as a trouble causer, he never bothered me as I was older than him. The family is well known. Get us in an office, 30 years later, I am pretty fit, he is a local nut case, this won't end happy. Any hint of physical intimidation, I am afraid I would react. He has never been into school, or indeed any social events. He is a boozer. I just feel this would be a dangerous interaction. The school do not realise how bad this family are...
 
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fossyant

fossyant

Ride It Like You Stole It!
Location
South Manchester
My son is at the clever end of the class, but doesn't play football loads. This is a big problem in the primary as its football or nothing. He likes football, but his passion is..... Bikes.

At the issue of sounding a complete snob ( which I am not and we have a small house,and work hard), the kids he has trouble with are from the local 'estate' and parents aren't busting a gut in work.

Well his new bike has added to the issues at school, but he uses it, he has clocked up some miles on it in just a month, riding to school and back and the 'long way home' that's got me in trouble.

Currently looking to build a stealth clunker to get him to high school. Oh, and he was challenged earlier this week with a race, by one of the bullies that's about a foot taller, let's say my short son kicked his ass down the road..

He is a tough cookie, no kids are perfect, but he is starting to kick back, this is a worry though..
 

Shaun

Founder
Moderator
No advice to offer really, I just hope you get a positive response from the school and that your son gets some well deserved peace.

You are being supportive whilst still giving him the freedom to be himself which sounds like a pretty healthy balance to me (possibly through gritted [frustrated] teeth, but important nonetheless!!).

Have a good weekend with the family and let us all know how it turns out. :thumbsup:
 

mr_hippo

Living Legend & Old Fart
Fossy, how I wish my parents gave me 10& of the support that you are giving your son..
I was at a school where one guy was picked on by some scum who beat him up quite badly. He had a bit of a speech impediment, no other reason..
Sounds very similar to my schooldays. When I first went to grammar school, I was taller than most boys in the fifth form. I was skitted from day one by a smaller boy and his gang - do not worry, Michael Robert Hart of Rainhill, I am not about to name and shame you! Now if I had hit him - bigger boy hitting smaller boy then I would be deemed the bully.
Could I have told my parents? Only tried that a few times and... I am from an era where the evening meal was taken sitting around a table - Mum, Dad, me and 5 siblings
Dad "Hey kids, do you know what happened to our Peter today in school?"
Siblings "No, Dad,what happened?"
He would then recount what happened and embellishing it as he went along and the others laughed and continued it for days afterwards.
Did anyone watch 'The King's Speech'? I wept when I watched it especially when Edward VIII was making exaggerated mouth movements to wind George VI up - took me back many years; I was talking to my siblings when they all burst out laughing. It was a dark evening, curtains were still open and as I glanced at the window I saw dad behind making the same exaggerated mouth movements. Silly me and I thought parents were supposed to help you!
I do not think that we can ever stop bullying either in school or the workplace 100% but if we nip it in the bud early enough....
 

compo

Veteran
Location
Harlow
I make no excuse for bullying, it is awful for the victims. However I wonder if bullying has got worse or have kids become weaker. years ago bullying was almost the norm and up to a point pretty well ignored by the authorities. Now kids get a nasty text or called names or get pushed around a bit and they think it's the end of the world. I sometimes think that all these so called experts, social workers, youth offending teams and the such like who get involved simply make the matter worse in many cases.
 

buggi

Bird Saviour
Location
Solihull
i think it's worse now with all the cyber bullying going on and i don't think they should allow mobile phones in school, there is no place for them there.
 

Night Train

Maker of Things
I have no useful advice to give but I am really glad to hear that you are actively supporting your son and being there when needed without over protecting him from everything. I really hope it is sorted and stops.

I was also bullied at school and my folks just said "Tell the teacher". The school staff said "Tell the teacher". The teacher said "Don't tell tales." and made me stand in the corner, for which I was bullied further.
I got bullied for being Chinese, for being clever, for wearing glasses, for having clean school uniform, for not playing football, for being able to read, for having short hair, for having long hair, for being honest, for just about everything really.

One day I got fed up and threw a punch back at one bully and missed. My fist went through one of the school cupboards in the classroom and got caned for it. Still have the scar on my fist to show for it.
Another time I got detention for smashing a bully in the face who threw ink over my white uniform shirt. The ink was disappearing ink from a joke shop but I didn't know at the time and no evidence was left by the time the teachers arrived.

Then one day I had to forcibly removed from a bully by two teachers because he was turning blue from my hands around his throat. Detention for that too.

It finally came to an end when I hung myself.
I did it as an art class play on words 'still life' in photography. I set up a scene where I apparently hung myself from a noose, while wearing a climbing harness for safety, from the beams on the ceiling of the school gym.

The head did his nut about it being allowed and that made the school pay attention to the 'cry for help'.
I left the following year so the bulling ended then for me anyway.

Anyway, what I mean to say is that without the support you are giving your son, it could escalate very badly and leave him in a very much worse position for the experience.
 

MontyVeda

a short-tempered ill-controlled small-minded troll
Kids and mobile phones, that's a whole different argument.

Cyber bullying... is it as wide spread as the scaremongering media would like us to think?

I disagree with Compo that "kids these day get a nasty text or called names and think it's the end of the world" Kids are generally as resilient today as they were in the ice age when Compo was a kid... this back in my day argument is weak and full of wind.
 

YahudaMoon

Über Member
Its just the way it is. 'Survival of the fittest' and all that quoted Charles Darwin. Bullying is a horrible trait that exist in lots of children, and as I remember my mum saying one day as I was a child, 'children are so much more evil than what adults are.

They ain't nothing worst than knowing one of your siblings is suffering, whether it be bullying, or anything else for that matter. The thought of any of my children suffering in any way fills my heart with dread

Its very likely fossyant 's sons perpetrator will come from some kind of poor family who get's ill treated at home though this ain't always the case. The child bully could come from a excellent home and just be some warped individual who enjoys inflicting pain and suffering to individuals and will always be a horrible bastard. Probably end up working in management finance lol

So you didn't go round the lads house and knock his dad out then Fossy ?
 

PBancroft

Senior Member
Location
Winchester
I make no excuse for bullying, it is awful for the victims. However I wonder if bullying has got worse or have kids become weaker. years ago bullying was almost the norm and up to a point pretty well ignored by the authorities. Now kids get a nasty text or called names or get pushed around a bit and they think it's the end of the world. I sometimes think that all these so called experts, social workers, youth offending teams and the such like who get involved simply make the matter worse in many cases.

In my experience bullies tend to go for the means of attack which leave the least chance of them getting caught. If there's evidence of nasty texts, chances are its only the tip of an iceberg.

I don't think bullying has got worse or kids have got weaker, its just the rules of "the game"* have changed.

*for want of a better phrase
 
I am not convinced it will work, but the primary have suggested we sit down with the main kids parents.
Gut reaction - that's bonkers. With enormous effort, I suppose I might be able to come with a dafter idea - but, by heck, it'd be hard. Be confronted with the other kid's parents - and them on their belligerent, defensive warpath?
 

subaqua

What’s the point
Location
Leytonstone
Time for the hard word.Police or your lad just might do something he gets the blame for.And the bully gets away with it and all the sympathy.

been there done that got the tshirt and the suspensions to show . i suffered from all the way through infants primary and secondary. last week of term in secondary i was pushed too far and lashed out and got caught. bully got away with it.

marked my card for a long timeand caused issues when i applied for the specials.


get it reported , get it sorted
 
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