Sometimes life just sucks

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Roscoe

Veteran
Apologies for what may be a depressing thread.

Father in law is currently in intensive care, slowly fading away from lung disease. He was taken in on Xmas Eve. It's so horrible to see this wee man with tubes everywhere and an oxygen mask on, slowly slipping away. Doctor told wife yesterday that there's no more they can do and it's just a matter of time, she's in bits. She watched her mum pass away from heart failure in the same place 4 years ago.

They've increased his morphine to the max to make him more comfortable, so he's not always lucid, which is sad for such an intelligent and interesting man.

She stayed by his side most of the day and night yesterday, spoon fed him and just talked to him.

The nurses swapped shifts last night, going on their 3 days off. They all came in and gave hugs and kisses, it really struck home that they don't expect him to be there when they come back.

Apologies for offloading this, just feeling useless right now and had to get it off my chest.

R
 

Col5632

Guru
Location
Cowdenbeath
That must be truly horrible :sad:
 

IDMark2

Dodgy Aerial
Location
On the Roof
Been there recently with Mother In Law...she went in for one thing and it just spiralled down from there. Just be there and support your wife in every way possible. Thoughts with you and family.
 

fossyant

Ride It Like You Stole It!
Location
South Manchester
My FIL passed away at home with lung cancer in the same way in October. Should have really been in hospital but family had taken him out then he got really ill and he was too ill to take in. No tubes but dosed up on morphine. Just went quietly thank god. He will be in no pain and will just go to sleep. Best wishes.
 

accountantpete

Brexiteer
Try holding his hand if poss - sometimes you get a little squeeze in response and will treasure the feeling for the rest of your life.
 

young Ed

Veteran
that really sad to hear :sad: try to hold strong and just remember you ae doing the best thing possible for him by being with him
Cheers Ed
 

Col5632

Guru
Location
Cowdenbeath
[QUOTE 3460567, member: 259"]My thoughts are with you too. It's awful, isn't it (for want of a better word), seeing people you remember as strong, lucid, and lively in a situation like this, but it will happen to some of us as well.

My mother is in a care home now, and is completely unaware of who is visiting her. She's cheerful (and otherwise healthy) enough, but the dementia means she might as well be on a different planet, and it's depressing being asked who you are when you go and see her...[/QUOTE]

Both my gran's suffered from dementia before they died, it's a truly horrible condition :sad:
 

Diggs

Veteran
Hi @Roscoe . Just to say that I'm thinking of you. I lost my mother just before Christmas and it's tough. I would say that you don't have to be strong all the time, sometimes you have to let it out too. Just be as supportive as you can (which I'm sure you are).
I'm lucky in that I have a hugely supportive family and friends and Dad, sis and myself have spent a lot of time together over Christmas with the kids as the focal point.
 
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