[QUOTE 1827585, member: 9609"]You can't have it both ways, when it comes to custody the woman is presumed to be the primary carer, so therefore can we not assume that if the child has not been brought up correctly then we can also point the finger at the woman. Seems only fair to me.
As for the OT stuff, it was you that went off topic on this badly done to woman's tangent. And as you know, throughout this thread I have very much been on the side of the mother who has received some very uncalled for comments.[/quote]
I acknowledge your last point, and indeed your contributions helped salvage what was becoming a rather nasty thread.
I didn't say women are presumed to be the primary carers, I said they usually were the primary carers. The courts are not acting on a presumption; they are recognising a fact. Any for all the flack they get, I'd say that they have an understanding of motherhood that is both less sentimental and less judgemental than the population at large, the media and the political classes. And I'm not trying to have anything both ways- the argument is perfectly coherent. It's reasonable to expect the two people who produce a child to share the responsibility for that child's care and well-being. So why assume that when a child is behaving in a particular way, that it is a result of what the mother is or isn't doing, rather than because of what the father is or isn't doing? My thumbs are too tired for more italics, or I'd emphasize the final "or isn't".
Anyway, we can still agree that we're OT, because there is no particular parenting issue arising from the video.
As for the OT stuff, it was you that went off topic on this badly done to woman's tangent. And as you know, throughout this thread I have very much been on the side of the mother who has received some very uncalled for comments.[/quote]
I acknowledge your last point, and indeed your contributions helped salvage what was becoming a rather nasty thread.
I didn't say women are presumed to be the primary carers, I said they usually were the primary carers. The courts are not acting on a presumption; they are recognising a fact. Any for all the flack they get, I'd say that they have an understanding of motherhood that is both less sentimental and less judgemental than the population at large, the media and the political classes. And I'm not trying to have anything both ways- the argument is perfectly coherent. It's reasonable to expect the two people who produce a child to share the responsibility for that child's care and well-being. So why assume that when a child is behaving in a particular way, that it is a result of what the mother is or isn't doing, rather than because of what the father is or isn't doing? My thumbs are too tired for more italics, or I'd emphasize the final "or isn't".
Anyway, we can still agree that we're OT, because there is no particular parenting issue arising from the video.
