The Retirement Thread

[Drago]

Another gem from face ache


View attachment 686433

Now, you joke but many moons ago a friend of mine was having terrible problems with a neighbours cat screeching at night and keeping him awake.

One night he got so fed up he put on his dressing gown and went outside and called the cat over. He started to stroke the cat and the moment its tail went vertical he slapped a teaspoon of extra hot mustard on its pencil sharpener. He never did get to sleep that night as he was too busy laughing at the poor moggie desperately trying to sort itself out.

 

[PaulSB]

Best of luck.
Will our boy be playing??
Wear a Rovers scarf so we can recognise you🙂

Cheers. Tyler Morton has been poor in recent matches and there's an opinion among fans Liverpool may have insisted he start "x" number of games. I don't know. On Wednesday he was dropped in favour of a young local lad, Adam Wharton, from the academy, who was MOTM. Morton got ten minutes at the end in place of Morton. Sorry Dave but I hope Morton doesn't start today. The scarf could be tricky as I suspect I'll be draped in rain gear. We're in row 4 and will be slightly to the left of the goal as you look at the Bill Shankly Kop end from the pitch................I'll wave! when I'm not jumping for joy

 

[PaulSB]

Now, you joke but many moons ago a friend of mine was having terrible problems with a neighbours cat screeching at night and keeping him awake.

One night he got so fed up he put on his dressing gown and went outside and called the cat over. He started to stroke the cat and the moment its tail went vertical he slapped a teaspoon of extra hot mustard on its pencil sharpener. He never did get to sleep that night as he was too busy laughing at the poor moggie desperately trying to sort itself out.

One has to hope the cat didn't try to wash itself!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[classic33]

Good morning. It is raining.........a lot. I had planned to go out with the club. Binned that when I heard the pitter patter machine gunfire of raindrops on our windows. I have had the most extraordinary amount of sleep in the last 15 hours. Got home after our walk yesterday and decided to have a snooze which became 2½ hours deep sleep in bed till 6.00pm! Went to bed at 10.00pm and slept till 5.30am. Really feeling quite chipper this morning.

So today? Well it's very wet so all outside activity is cancelled. I will find indoor stuff to do. Not sure what but there must be something which needs doing. I won't be asking Mrs P, that would make it a very busy day. Then we have the footie at 5.30pm, hmmmmm????? PNE v Rovers. HUGE game. What do we know about this?

• Our seats are in row three. We will get wet
• Traffic will be horrendous
• The result could well determine our season
• The result WILL determine the size of my whisky glass around 8.00pm
• I am nervous and excited

That's about it really. Wish us luck.

Could you not just use the larger glass but vary the amount in it. It'd be a lot easier than looking for different sized glasses to suit your mood on the day.

 

[pawl]

Morning. Bloody chilly start here again but the sun is out now and we have a blue sky. Last really nice day for a while though.

I got out for a 21 mile bimble while it was quiet. Hopefully get a walk later. Tomorrow's plan is an early walk/jog then settle down to watch the London Marathon.

Ca n I bimble on my turbo If it’s ok I’ve just done a 45 min bimble 🚲😀🚲😀

 

[Dave7]

I ha

Cheers. Tyler Morton has been poor in recent matches and there's an opinion among fans Liverpool may have insisted he start "x" number of games. I don't know. On Wednesday he was dropped in favour of a young local lad, Adam Wharton, from the academy, who was MOTM. Morton got ten minutes at the end in place of Morton. Sorry Dave but I hope Morton doesn't start today. The scarf could be tricky as I suspect I'll be draped in rain gear. We're in row 4 and will be slightly to the left of the goal as you look at the Bill Shankly Kop end from the pitch................I'll wave! when I'm not jumping for joy

I have read mixed reports about Morton. I hope he makes it but so many of these 'promising' young lads just can't seem to do it.
Enjoy the game.

 

[numbnuts]

I'm going for a walk, but I think it's going to

 

[Dave7]

I am just enjoying MrsDs vibrator while having a whisky
Sport will be on tv shortly so I will watch the footy.
Breakfast was remains of yesterdays pizza. Late lunch will either fried egg barm or cheese and tomato, yet to decide.
Edit
That is her foot massage vibrator.

 

[fritz katzenjammer]

I am just enjoying MrsDs vibrator while having a whisky

Edit
That is her foot massage vibrator.

You really did have me worried there...

 

[Dirk]

Finally got my caravan facing the correct way on the drive. Thank gawd for motor movers!

 

[BoldonLad]

Finally got my caravan facing the correct way on the drive. Thank gawd for motor movers!

View attachment 686459

We are Motorhome owners, so, Motor Movers are not relevant. I did have a little play with one, when helping a caravaner position his caravan, great fun!,

 

[numbnuts]

Done walking and the rain held off too

 

[Drago]

Cars cleaned. Cant believe well soon have 3 of the bloody things to clean, although the turd is going to stay in the garage under a cover.

 

[welsh dragon]

We had chicken sandwiches today. Its nice when the sun shines, but it's quite cool when it goes in.

 

[Drago]

Just had a lovely bit of steak in peppercorn sauce for tea.