Things people who don't cycle say

[Jody]

On the way up Snowdon by almost every ped

"You're bringing a bike up here? You must be mad"

Reply "Well it is a Mountain Bike"

 

[mjr]

Not had it so much since moving to the fens, where far more people cycle and it's known as an easier way to get around than driving, but kindly neighbours in Somerset used to offer to give us lifts if we ever needed to go anywhere, despite knowing full well we had a working car parked by the house.

 

[EltonFrog]

"g'waan Wigoooo"

 

[ACS]

You rode how far at the weekend ?

300km ?

What's that in miles; about 200 ?

Really ?

Did you win?

 

[captain nemo1701]

"You spent HOW MUCH on your bike?"

To which I normally respond along the lines of... "Yeah, it cost about a grand, but I can maintain it for less than a tank of petrol a year and it's lasted me ten years already... and it gets me too and from work... and the pub... and for weekend cycles around Richmond Park... and to the shops... ... ... How much were your golf clubs by the way?"

I know. A work colleague spent £900 on carbon fibre fishing rods, so I don't feel guilty about splurging on my machine.

 

[captain nemo1701]

"The roads are too dangerous and congested"

Er, well, there are off road segregated cycle paths, bus lanes, in rush hour the traffic is practically at a standstill anyway, so I can move through the traffic as my bike is smaller and more manoeuvrable than a car. And being Bristol, we have the good old Railway Path which is a main arterial route...no cars!.

"Don't you get wet when it rains?"

There are such things as waterproofs.

 

[ACS]

Oh my lord, what happened to your face?

I hit the @rse end of a stag while descending a hill at speed and took a tumble over a wire fence.

Hope the deer wasn't hurt.

 

[Tim Hall]

"Wow, you look awesome"

(I can but hope)

 

[Joey Shabadoo]

Why don't cyclists ever look like they're enjoying it?

 

[Deleted member 35268]

"Grow up" Shouted a mid aged fart in his swanky car who was stuck behind me

 

[threebikesmcginty]

That's a huge frame (usually blind to the fact I'm a big chap)

No, they were talking about you.

 

[Electric_Andy]

When raining: "I bet you got wet today" No I stuck an umbrella up my ass, that's why the handle has a bend at the end.
When cold: "I bet it's cold on the bike isn't it?" It's uphill all the way, so no.
When dark: "I hope you've got lights" No, I just brush my teeth extra hard and smile.
During roadworks: "The traffic was awful, how long did it take you to get home?" Um, about 3 minutes longer than usual.

Fairly unrelated but funny anyway: My Mum rang and I told her I'd sold my motorbike, and that a courier had just picked it up and was delivering it to the new owner. In all seriousness, she asked "I hope you got the money first?".

 

[GuyBoden]

On stating it's a shared Cycle and Pedestrian path, a woman replied, "That means. You have to get off your bike and walk with it!".

 

[Dec66]

From a Parisian lady in the Catford Constitutional a couple of years ago when I was at peak "racing snake";

"Oooh, you look like a cyclist... Can I feel your thighs?" Obviously I was too much of a gentleman to refuse.

To my mate: "You don't".

(He's a good footballer, in fairness)

 

[nickyboy]

Hey hot stuff