This is hard... Chuffy - get in here!!!

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buggi

Bird Saviour
Location
Solihull
be honest with your brother. my bro's mrs is a nightmare too and she's the reason he doesn't come to visit from scotland. he dragged her along to say bye to my sister the other day before she went to Oz and he told my sister that he had to practically drag her down here. She made is VERY obvious she didn't want to be here. i think normally he just likes a quiet life so we don't see much of him (and its harder when they have kids together) but he knew he wasn't gonna see my sister for years so he put his foot down. your brother is probably the same, anything for a quiet life, so just explain to him that you feel sad you are growing apart but you really can't afford to come over. then get a webcam/skype thingy. if things are still strained after that, then i dunno what else you can do.
 

Abitrary

New Member
buggi said:
be honest with your brother. my bro's mrs is a nightmare too and she's the reason he doesn't come to visit from scotland. he dragged her along to say bye to my sister the other day before she went to Oz and he told my sister that he had to practically drag her down here. She made is VERY obvious she didn't want to be here. i think normally he just likes a quiet life so we don't see much of him (and its harder when they have kids together) but he knew he wasn't gonna see my sister for years so he put his foot down. your brother is probably the same, anything for a quiet life, so just explain to him that you feel sad you are growing apart but you really can't afford to come over. then get a webcam/skype thingy. if things are still strained after that, then i dunno what else you can do.

proper paragraphs.
 
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snapper_37

snapper_37

Barbara Woodhouse's Love Child
Location
Wolves
Well I've sent the Sis In Law a 'handshake of peace'. Hopefully, we can try and be civil, at least for the kid's sake. I still don't want to visit though!!! :smile:
 
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snapper_37

snapper_37

Barbara Woodhouse's Love Child
Location
Wolves
fossyant said:
Your bro will appreciate it, but the yankie wife might not just understand.......lifestyles and all.....

Ahhh, but she's not a yank. This is another thing that pisses me off. She is born and bred pure Black Country ..... but now ... daahhhhllling, I forgot just how tiny the houses are over here .... :smile:
 
Serenity Prayer, innit?

Can you change the sister? Probably not.
Can you change your brother? Probably not.
Can you MAKE them spend money if they don't want to? Probably not.
Can you be honest with them? Probably
Can you change your own reaction to the situation? Probably
 

gavintc

Guru
Location
Southsea
I would play the long game with this one. You do not need them, they clearly have an attitude about UK and you. My instinct is therefore to continue with the Christmas Cards, the odd e-mail but reduce the guilt complex in yourself and do not feel you have to visit them. At some point, your brother will appreciate what he has lost and may try to re-connect. If not, move on with your life.
 
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