Tip of the day

[Aperitif]

Ricard first, ice next and fill will water.
Ah holidays!

 

[ColinJ]

(#1) When riding a bicycle down a steep hill on the outskirts of Burnley, do not become obsessed with hitting 60 mph.

(#2) If you ignore #1 and you get your chin down on your handlebar stem to reduce drag, do not become hypnotised by the reading on your bike computer as it rises to 50... 51... 52... 53... 54... 55 mph!

(#3) If you also ignore #2, be sure to use a gum shield so that when you reach 56 mph, hit a raised manhole cover, take off, fly through the air for 50 yards, land hard, bounce, take off again, land hard again, slew across the road and almost drop the bike in front of oncoming traffic... you don't bite the end of your tongue off !

 

[graham56]

(#1) When riding a bicycle down a steep hill on the outskirts of Burnley, do not become obsessed with hitting 60 mph.

(#2) If you ignore #1 and you get your chin down on your handlebar stem to reduce drag, do not become hypnotised by the reading on your bike computer as it rises to 50... 51... 52... 53... 54... 55 mph!

(#3) If you also ignore #2, be sure to use a gum shield so that when you reach 56 mph, hit a raised manhole cover, take off, fly through the air for 50 yards, land hard, bounce, take off again, land hard again, slew across the road and almost drop the bike in front of oncoming traffic... you don't bite the end of your tongue off !

(#4) Check your pants

 

[Dayvo]

(#4) Check your pants

#5 - no heavy breathing at high velocity!

 

[ColinJ]

(#4) Check your pants

Oh yes, I forgot that one! It was definitely a brown shorts moment... I was airborne long enough the first time to think about how much damage I was going to do to myself when I crashed. I don't know how I stayed upright.

As for my tongue - okay it didn't get bitten off, but my teeth did cut deep into it - damn painful it was too !

 

[graham56]

As for my tongue - okay it didn't get bitten off, but my teeth did cut deep into it - damn painful it was too !

Just as well otherwise you wouldn`t to "chat" on here.

 

[alecstilleyedye]

Tip of the day.
My daughters bedroom, at this moment it`s in real shoot order.

my daughter's room is ok, but my sons' room… sheesh

(for benefit of arch, there are two sons in the one room, hence the apostrophe).

 

[Arch]

my daughter's room is ok, but my sons' room… sheesh

(for benefit of arch, there are two sons in the one room, hence the apostrophe).

Excellent, thanks for the clarification...

 

[alecstilleyedye]

If God gives you nothing but lemons, then go make some lemonade.

you'd be a bit stuck if he forgot to give you the water and the sugar…

 

[Chappy]

Never wipe your ARSE with a broken bottle

 

[Night Train]

blue is live brown is neutral

With that tip I'm not surprised you look like that!

 

[Joe24]

With that tip I'm not surprised you look like that!

At school we had a plug projected on the board with the different components in. We were asked to put our hands up and label it. The kid i never like because e thought he was right all the time said that blue was live, brown was neutral. The teacher asked who agreed and the most of the sheep people put their hands up and followed. The rest didnt have a clue. I was asked next and i corrected the mistake. The teacher didnt sound convinced, neither did the rest of the class. The fact the teacher didnt sound convinced scared me the most. When she went to the next slide and i was correct i sat there with a smile on my face. The teacher was abit confused and the kid that first said it sat there and made an excuse.
We then had to wire up a plug. I did 2(did a mates aswell) in the time it took the teacher to do one, and the kid i didnt like to do one.
Never liked that teacher or most of the class. Bit worrying that she didnt know either
I knew due to doing amateur radio and having to do it then

 

[alecstilleyedye]

Could I then not make some potent home-brew lemon hooch merely using my saliva as the active ingredient in place of yeast?

no

 

[Night Train]

Don't test ride your rebuilt KMX on the green outside without mudguards, or checking the grass for dog poo first!

 

[Night Train]

The kid i never like because e thought he was right all the time said that blue was live, brown was neutral. The teacher asked who agreed and the most of the sheep people put their hands up and followed. The rest didnt have a clue. I was asked next and i corrected the mistake. The teacher didnt sound convinced, neither did the rest of the class. The fact the teacher didnt sound convinced scared me the most.

Never liked that teacher or most of the class. Bit worrying that she didnt know either
I knew due to doing amateur radio and having to do it then

This lack of knowledge is getting too common and I suspect that moulded plugs on appliances haven't helped. It was easier when the colours were red, black and green.

Now electrical cables have brown and blue and also brown, black and grey. Not good if your colour vision is at its best.