I went shopping today with Mrs Salad, who is irritatingly the biggest back seat driver in in the UK, and possibly even in the world. She has the gold award from the Institute of Advanced Rear Seat Experts.
Sometimes she even extends to me the benefit of her "advice" from outside the car. By standing where I can't see and shouting when I can't hear.
Today, in a busy supermarket car park, I was happily manoeuvring my car, whilst she stood alongside, shouting the odds. The young whippersnapper in the car next door even went so far as to sarcastically suggest that he should move his car, so that I would have more room to aim at! Cheeky young sod! Doesn't he realise that I drove a tank in the war........
But my real peeve today was the people wandering round the supermarket, gawping at the special offer food as though they had never seen food in their lives before. Admittedly, Patagonian Parrot Liver pate is an acquired taste, and the roast badger cook in sauce for the Vietnamese pot bellied pigs in blankets is a bit outside the mainstream, but there's no need to clog up the shop gazing at it for hours, is there? Either buy some, or move on to the super savers baked beans aisle, where you all know what you are looking at. But for heaven's sake get out of my way. I have got to get my shopping done and be back indoors by half past ten, to have my next lot of tablets and some cocoa......
