Tosspots on my Travels

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dhd.evans

Veteran
Location
Dundee
I've been toying with this post for some time. For the last 4 weeks i've been back to cycling to work 5 days a week which, in some respects, is great. In others, it is not. Where i used to cycle 2-3 times a week and come up against the occasional idiot on the road I find myself saturated in idiocy due to the increased volume of travelling.

Here are some of my highlights. Hey, we could play this like a Michelin I-Spy book - tick off the ones you've experienced:

  • Driver overtaking whilst overtaking parked cars, meets car on other side of road, immediately brakes. I stop myself from hitting his rear bumper by using my hands on his car. Too. Close.
  • Driver overtakes on a right hand blind bend, meets car on other side of road, nips back in. I end up bracing myself for impact on the kerb. Too. Damn. Close.
  • The left hook. Driver overtakes me then immediately brakes and turns left across me into parking space. Once stopped i remonstrate with him, he advises me that 'according to the highway code, cyclists must obey car users'. How stupid of me! I had forgotten this!
  • The Chip-on-the-shoulder cyclist. Late home from work one night I start to gun it down my usual route. Need to catch up time. See a succession of cyclists (spaced out on the road) down the way. They are travelling slower than me, so i give them berth and overtake. Last one bellows something unintelligible at me. I continue on. 5 minutes later I sense a bike behind me. Yep. That guy who just shouted. "I could do this all day!" he shouts. "I'm 45 years old and on a mountain bike, you're aero bars on your bike can't help against pure fitness!" he adds. Awesome. I've an arse on my rear wheel with a chip on his shoulder. Now, I slowed down to avoid a confrontation and we chatted. He turns out to be an alright guy, but getting burned made him assume i was on for a race. I was not. I was simply trying to get home quickly. We chatted for most of the way home. Kept pace. I got home faster than i normally would have.
  • The pinch-point bandits. It's a pinch point, i move to primary. You drive up the inside of me and slow down. Because slowing down makes it ok to be so close my fingertips touch your wing mirrors.
  • The poor judge of speed. I am travelling on the road at 25mph+ you are at a junction. Yes, I am a cyclist. No, that does not mean pull out of the junction into my path. Too. Damn. Close.
  • The shared-use path Nazi. Part of my route is on a shared use path. That's fine, i give peds distance and berth and always ring my bell coming up behind them. With thanks to the 70 year old lady who insisted not only was i travelling too fast but the best way to slow me down was to deliberately step into my path to tell me so. We both almost died. Congratulations.
But, that aside, i'm managing 100 mile weeks again and enjoying it.

Any additions to these tosspots on your travels?
 

tadpole

Senior Member
Location
St George
All that and people who over take you and then narrow the gap between them and the curb in order to make you stay behind them, I just over take on the outside. Dog walker on the cycle path who let their dogs walk and sh** all over the path. People throwing stuff out of cars at you. the list is endless. Well done on the commute ^_^
 

Arjimlad

Tights of Cydonia
Location
South Glos
The impatient builder. Going down the only singletrack part of my ride in, which is all of 120 yards long. Builder in white van is inches from my back wheel revving the nuts off his diesel van. Screeches past as soon as the road opens up into the path of very alarmed oncoming lady in a Yaris.

I must have held him up for all of 15 seconds as I was doing 18mph along this lane.
 

Cyclopathic

Veteran
Location
Leicester.
There's a guy with a high powered sniper rifle keeps taking pot shots at me from somewhere but I can't tell where. He could be half a mile away in a block of flats. No way to tell. It's really starting to pee me off I can tell you. He (or she) only has to get lucky once. I have to be lucky every day. Sometimes twice.
Either that or a car is backfiring, but what are the chances of that with modern cars?
 

StuartG

slower but no further
Location
SE London
"The Highway Code says you should be in single file" yells the overtaking tosspot's moll from all of 5mm away on a wide open road ...
 

johnnyh

Veteran
Location
Somerset
Nearing a junction with 4 cars waiting to turn out, woman in Citreon overtakes despite not having the room to pull back in as we are 20 yds from the next car...

Went round the outside of her and made a comment of "that was worth it then!"... stupid bint.
 

ianrauk

Tattooed Beat Messiah
Location
Rides Ti2
I hate the people creeping over the white line at T junctions when you pass. They have seen you but can't wait behind the line, gives me heart palpitations thinking they are about to pull out. :angry:


this really get's on my friggin goat.
Stop the bloody creeping forward and stay behind the line. :cursing:
 

2wheelsgeth

Rebuilt, but not yet better than ever
Location
London
The thing that's started happening to me recently is being undertaken by other cyclists while waiting at red lights, regardless of how little space I've left. A guy did it to me on the junction of Canonbury Lane and Upper St one morning last week just as the lights changed - gave me such a shock I nearly wobbled into the side of the car next to me. Not as much a a shock as he gave the roadie in front of me who was turning left - collision just about avoided thanks to the roadie's peripheral vision...
 
1. No-one indicates left on a roundabout any more. In fact many, if they remember to indicate at all are still signalling right as they leave.
2. We don't use handbrakes any more, so on hills standing traffic rolls backwards slowly, of course giving you an LED brake light in the face at all times.
 

guitarpete247

Just about surviving
Location
Leicestershire
There's a guy with a high powered sniper rifle keeps taking pot shots at me from somewhere but I can't tell where. He could be half a mile away in a block of flats. No way to tell. It's really starting to pee me off I can tell you. He (or she) only has to get lucky once. I have to be lucky every day. Sometimes twice.
Either that or a car is backfiring, but what are the chances of that with modern cars?
What part of Leicester do we have avoid? :becool:
 
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