True Facts About Chris Rea

[Drago]

John Lennon faked his own death and now lives in disguise as his alter ego, Chris Rea.

 

[TheDoctor]

Chris Rea has had five consecutive Christmas Number Ones.
'Driving Home for Christmas' wasn't one of them.

 

[TheDoctor]

No-one has ever seen Drago and Chris Rea in the same garden centre cafe.

 

[Drago]

No-one has ever seen Drago and Chris Rea in the same garden centre cafe.

Don t you dare reveal my secret!

 

[grldtnr]

Aha! I suspect there is hanging in the loft ,of Drago towers is a portrait of Chris Rea,ala Dorian Grey.
Or is it the other way round Chris Rea has a portrait of Drago hanging in his Garret.
Maybe this is why you never see the two together, only Chris Rea sitting there with his 1 cup teapot, which always dribbles tea when its poured.

 

[grldtnr]

Chris Rea invented the leaky stainless 1 cup tea pot, much loved by catering establishment, he made so much cash that he was able to up grade the 'Turdis' with extra lights & mirrors with a go faster stripe, and a whip Ariel with a faux Coney pelt on it.

 

[Grant Fondo]

Chris perfected the recipe for spreadable butter whilst still at school.
On trying some, his mother remarked, "Chris, I can't believe it's not butter!"
And there it was, Blue Band was invented.

 

[TheDoctor]

Chris Rea co-wrote the Catatonia hit 'Road Rage'

 

[PeteXXX]

Chris Rea turns his Y-Fronts inside out on Wednesdays so he can get a whole week out of them.

 

[Dogtrousers]

Chris Rea turns his Y-Fronts inside out on Wednesdays so he can get a whole week out of them.

And using his "one on one off" system his other pair can recover and be ready for another week's service.

 

[Drago]

Chris Rea wears husband Y fronts normal, reverse, inside out normal, inside out reverse.

Rumour is that as a member of the Illuminati he is privy to a fifth combination which is unknown to commoners.

 

[Illaveago]

Chris Rea was voted pipe smoker of they year 6 years running from 1988.

Was Running Home for Christmas his follow up song to Driving Home for Christmas? Never made it into the charts despite trying to promote it for those 6 years.

 

[Illaveago]

Chris Rea was just about to announce a comeback tour with his identical triplets but had the headlines stolen by 2 other brothers.

 

[Dogtrousers]

Chris Rea Starred alongside Felicity Kendal and Bob Hoskins in a comedy film directed by Michael Winner. It was described by the film critic of The Independent as "the worst film I have ever seen".

No, really, he did. And it was.

 

[Illaveago]

Chris Rea was a successful rower but had to give it up after it was reported in the press. "Chris Rea Rowing Again!" Many people miss- read this as him being an extremely argumentative person!