Vacuuming, dusting, just keeping your home generally tidy. Do you bother or have you like me given up, finding it hard to keep on top of?

[gbb]

Aha, my chance to boast...
I care for my wife who does just about manages to do downstairs each day but I do everything else...everything.
Up at 7 do kids breakfast quick tidy round downstairs to ease the load on my wife
Kids clothes ironed, ready for them to get dressed
Bathroom cleaned.
Two bedrooms, beds made, kids do 'help' tidy up their stuff from the previous night.
Entire upstairs hoovered every day.
All finished by 08.30 to get the kids to school.

All meals cooked by me.
Downstairs laminate floors cleaned every couple days.
Stairs hoovered every couple days
Laundry EVERY SODDING day
All shopping done by me. Etc etc etc.

It's really not hard, you just have to want to and make sure you do ...do.
I sit there sometimes and think, right, I'm going to throw some stuff away and will attack a bedroom set of drawers or something, we have lots of stuff...I hate 'stuff'...and yet I still sit there other times with a nagging boredom, so there's plenty time left over by the time I've done it all.

 

[Pinno718]

Aha, my chance to boast...
I care for my wife who does just about manages to do downstairs each day but I do everything else...everything.
Up at 7 do kids breakfast quick tidy round downstairs to ease the load on my wife
Kids clothes ironed, ready for them to get dressed
Bathroom cleaned.
Two bedrooms, beds made, kids do 'help' tidy up their stuff from the previous night.
Entire upstairs hoovered every day.
All finished by 08.30 to get the kids to school.

All meals cooked by me.
Downstairs laminate floors cleaned every couple days.
Stairs hoovered every couple days
Laundry EVERY SODDING day
All shopping done by me. Etc etc etc.

It's really not hard, you just have to want to and make sure you do ...do.
I sit there sometimes and think, right, I'm going to throw some stuff away and will attack a bedroom set of drawers or something, we have lots of stuff...I hate 'stuff'...and yet I still sit there other times with a nagging boredom, so there's plenty time left over by the time I've done it all.

You can fit everything in if you are organised.
I'm chief cook and bottle washer. We clean as and when. Mrs P is a whizz with her hoover.
Daily ironing? Oh hell no*. We do ours on a Sunday - the rest just gets tumble dried.

*Sunday, when a bachelor was 'Do I iron 5 shirts for the week or just do one everyday?'. I hated it. Then I saw the light: "Assistant manager wanted for delicatessen, newsagent and greengrocer.' Then the suits and the job doing FSA regs. for a large company got ditched. I took a pay cut but never looked back. No more frikkin ironing (for myself).

 

[Drago]

Aha, my chance to boast...
I care for my wife who does just about manages to do downstairs each day but I do everything else...everything.
Up at 7 do kids breakfast quick tidy round downstairs to ease the load on my wife
Kids clothes ironed, ready for them to get dressed
Bathroom cleaned.
Two bedrooms, beds made, kids do 'help' tidy up their stuff from the previous night.
Entire upstairs hoovered every day.
All finished by 08.30 to get the kids to school.

All meals cooked by me.
Downstairs laminate floors cleaned every couple days.
Stairs hoovered every couple days
Laundry EVERY SODDING day
All shopping done by me. Etc etc etc.

It's really not hard, you just have to want to and make sure you do ...do.
I sit there sometimes and think, right, I'm going to throw some stuff away and will attack a bedroom set of drawers or something, we have lots of stuff...I hate 'stuff'...and yet I still sit there other times with a nagging boredom, so there's plenty time left over by the time I've done it all.

Much the same as me. Im Mrs Ds caree while she's being treated for lymphoma and I'm doing the lot. Im up at 0600hrs, and that's when she woukd ordinarily get up for work herself and I want to maintain the household routine. She's working from home at the moment, so she gets on with things on the magic piano while I fuss round her.

 

[No Ta Doctor]

I never clean, my house is a mess, I don't want it to be so, but trying to explain to people is difficult.
I have brain damage.
The executive function 'doing' part of my brain is virtually non - existent (I have not been on a bike in a very long time and often spend all say in the house doing nothing) and I have what looks to many like ADD (or whatever it's called this week). Trying to explain is difficult, especially my Dad, who is nothing but a condescending prick about it.
I can't even explain it myself at times as it covers every aspect of my life.

I need help, but I also need to get the house tidied enough first before I can get help. It's a vicious circle. And no, my own family can go spin on it after the last time they 'helped' 🙄🤦‍♂️

I do go out every day, so at least I'm not sat in my flat going over the same old depressing thoughts in my mind and with being out I don't have that should I shouldn't I clean up anguish. I do tend to sit in my car, sometimes for nearly or more than an hour after being out all afternoon to avoid my flat, until it's too late to start vacuuming as it'll be too late, which could cause neighbour annoyance. Being out all afternoon, and evening in the summer months means dusty flat out of sight, out of mind! I hate it when I get the very odd visitor as they tend to arrive unannounced when I haven't cleaned up for quite a while. The times I've spent a few hours cleaning up they've never turned up soon after, it's always when the dust is there for them to see they arrive!

I was diagnosed with ADD last year, at the ripe old age of 54. It explained a lot of stuff (for those that don't know, it's ADHD without the hyperactivity - or ADHD for people who can sit on the sofa all day). With ADD, the dopamine pathways that reward doing boring stuff for a later benefit just aren't there. This makes executive function very difficult. Add to this that the brain is going a million miles an hour all the time but is continually jumping the tracks (unless it's hyper-focused, where it can't turn away from what it's thinking about and loses track of time completely).

Even if I start doing something positive with housework I'm liable to forget what it was I was doing and what I came into the room for. Cooking - which I'm actually half-decent at - is a nightmare because I can never follow a recipe without improvising, and when trying to decide what to make (and thus what to shop for) I end up with so many different ideas to choose between without being able to make a decision. So after a couple of hours of just thinking about what to eat I'm mentally exhausted and can't be arsed shopping, even if I did come up with a recipe decision.

The flat is filthy and a complete tip, to the extent that people should probably be removing their shoes when they leave, so as not to tread the dirt into the outdoors. 😞

I don't like visitors - apart from my adult kids - as it's embarrassing. I think all three of my kids have inherited the ADD as well, to some extent (it was my daughter that first opened my eyes to it). The diagnosis, however, has made it marginally easier to live with - I can take a deep breath (coughs due to dust...) and let it go when it gets too much. I know it's not some moral failing on my part, it's genuinely difficult and a struggle. It can still be depressing, but that takes the edge off it.

This is also on top of nearly three years of ill-health (HPV cancer in the mouth - clear now, colitis flaring up after 20 years leading to a colectomy this year, then a blood clot removed post-op). I don't think the chemo, steroids etc have had a particularly good effect on the ADD stuff - though when on the high dose steroids I got lots of stuff done in a manic project phase.

Now I've just started again on medication for the ADD, which will hopefully help - I'm still finding the levels. I can get more focus, but direction is difficult - e.g. I've just spent half an hour writing this instead of making lunch and my bladder is bursting....

Anyway - to those struggling - good luck, and you're not alone! I hope you can find what works for you. For me today it's this: I'm going to have some lunch, then I'm going to pop out to my local and sit in the sun with a cold beer, watching the world go by. I might watch some cycling on my phone or see if I can get them to show it in the bar.

 

[gbb]

I was diagnosed with ADD last year, at the ripe old age of 54. It explained a lot of stuff (for those that don't know, it's ADHD without the hyperactivity - or ADHD for people who can sit on the sofa all day). With ADD, the dopamine pathways that reward doing boring stuff for a later benefit just aren't there. This makes executive function very difficult. Add to this that the brain is going a million miles an hour all the time but is continually jumping the tracks (unless it's hyper-focused, where it can't turn away from what it's thinking about and loses track of time completely).

Even if I start doing something positive with housework I'm liable to forget what it was I was doing and what I came into the room for. Cooking - which I'm actually half-decent at - is a nightmare because I can never follow a recipe without improvising, and when trying to decide what to make (and thus what to shop for) I end up with so many different ideas to choose between without being able to make a decision. So after a couple of hours of just thinking about what to eat I'm mentally exhausted and can't be arsed shopping, even if I did come up with a recipe decision.

The flat is filthy and a complete tip, to the extent that people should probably be removing their shoes when they leave, so as not to tread the dirt into the outdoors. 😞

I don't like visitors - apart from my adult kids - as it's embarrassing. I think all three of my kids have inherited the ADD as well, to some extent (it was my daughter that first opened my eyes to it). The diagnosis, however, has made it marginally easier to live with - I can take a deep breath (coughs due to dust...) and let it go when it gets too much. I know it's not some moral failing on my part, it's genuinely difficult and a struggle. It can still be depressing, but that takes the edge off it.

This is also on top of nearly three years of ill-health (HPV cancer in the mouth - clear now, colitis flaring up after 20 years leading to a colectomy this year, then a blood clot removed post-op). I don't think the chemo, steroids etc have had a particularly good effect on the ADD stuff - though when on the high dose steroids I got lots of stuff done in a manic project phase.

Now I've just started again on medication for the ADD, which will hopefully help - I'm still finding the levels. I can get more focus, but direction is difficult - e.g. I've just spent half an hour writing this instead of making lunch and my bladder is bursting....

Anyway - to those struggling - good luck, and you're not alone! I hope you can find what works for you. For me today it's this: I'm going to have some lunch, then I'm going to pop out to my local and sit in the sun with a cold beer, watching the world go by. I might watch some cycling on my phone or see if I can get them to show it in the bar.

Interesting to read, thanks for sharing. It's so easy (and I'd be guilty of it as well prior to reading your experience) to just assume...lazy. Just goes to show, we judge without living in someone's shoes...

 

[Mad Doug Biker]

I was diagnosed with ADD last year, at the ripe old age of 54. It explained a lot of stuff (for those that don't know, it's ADHD without the hyperactivity - or ADHD for people who can sit on the sofa all day). With ADD, the dopamine pathways that reward doing boring stuff for a later benefit just aren't there. This makes executive function very difficult. Add to this that the brain is going a million miles an hour all the time but is continually jumping the tracks (unless it's hyper-focused, where it can't turn away from what it's thinking about and loses track of time completely).

Even if I start doing something positive with housework I'm liable to forget what it was I was doing and what I came into the room for. Cooking - which I'm actually half-decent at - is a nightmare because I can never follow a recipe without improvising, and when trying to decide what to make (and thus what to shop for) I end up with so many different ideas to choose between without being able to make a decision. So after a couple of hours of just thinking about what to eat I'm mentally exhausted and can't be arsed shopping, even if I did come up with a recipe decision.

The flat is filthy and a complete tip, to the extent that people should probably be removing their shoes when they leave, so as not to tread the dirt into the outdoors. 😞

I don't like visitors - apart from my adult kids - as it's embarrassing. I think all three of my kids have inherited the ADD as well, to some extent (it was my daughter that first opened my eyes to it). The diagnosis, however, has made it marginally easier to live with - I can take a deep breath (coughs due to dust...) and let it go when it gets too much. I know it's not some moral failing on my part, it's genuinely difficult and a struggle. It can still be depressing, but that takes the edge off it.

This is also on top of nearly three years of ill-health (HPV cancer in the mouth - clear now, colitis flaring up after 20 years leading to a colectomy this year, then a blood clot removed post-op). I don't think the chemo, steroids etc have had a particularly good effect on the ADD stuff - though when on the high dose steroids I got lots of stuff done in a manic project phase.

Now I've just started again on medication for the ADD, which will hopefully help - I'm still finding the levels. I can get more focus, but direction is difficult - e.g. I've just spent half an hour writing this instead of making lunch and my bladder is bursting....

Anyway - to those struggling - good luck, and you're not alone! I hope you can find what works for you. For me today it's this: I'm going to have some lunch, then I'm going to pop out to my local and sit in the sun with a cold beer, watching the world go by. I might watch some cycling on my phone or see if I can get them to show it in the bar.

I have not been diagnosed and I am not sure where the brain injury ends anyway.

Thanks for the post, it's most informative! 👍🏻

 

[Ming the Merciless]

I hoover my lawn, before combing all the grass to be in the same direction.

 

[Mad Doug Biker]

I hoover my lawn, before combing all the grass to be in the same direction.

Ming:

"I piss excellence!"

 

[Drago]

My lawn is a bit patchy so I let it grown and it a combover.

 

[Ming the Merciless]

My lawn is a bit patchy so I let it grown and it a combover.

View: https://youtu.be/FvNdhriwGuM?feature=shared

 

[Kingfisher101]

Mine is very clean and fairly tidy. I hoover everyday, wash up a couple of times per day, sweep the kitchen floor every and mop about once a week or so. The floors dont get dirty. I do a wash once a week as its only me here and I have plenty of clothes.
Accy, Why dont you just pay one of those people who advertise on Facebook for a deep clean/tidy. Then try to stay ontop of it or pay for a regular cleaner? Its very depressing when your house gets in a state.
Before Xmas when I had my rewire done, I had no carpet down and all the walls were stripped or just showing fresh plaster. It was really hard in freezing conditions. I've decorated 5 rooms now and had a new carpet down. I want my living space to be nice as it makes me fee better.

 

[Accy cyclist]

Thanks for he replies so far! I did think on posting this thread that I'd be in quite a small minority, but it seems I'm not! My plans for this afternoon are to go to the laundry, wash the dishes etc when I get back, maybe vacuum my living room carpet even the stairs if I have the time and check on my parents and grandparents graves to see if those annoying grass cutters/strimmers have left cut grass all over them. If I were to tell the above to a therapist they'd give me probably 8 out of 10 for effort. Though saying I intend doing them and actually doing them are not quite the same! If I can do the laundry and check those graves I'll give myself a pat on the back.

I've managed to go to the laundry and brush the cut grass off my parents and grandparents graves today, but I've yet to do the washing up and it's now too late to vacuum my living room and stairs as It'll take me a good 40 minutes to hang my laundry here and there around my flat. After I've done that I'm going to do the washing up.

 

[Kingfisher101]

Just do 15 -20 minutes here and there if you really struggle with it.
I do that with the garden as I loathe gardening. Doing a whole morning or day would be too much.
But if yours is really bad then for the sake of a few ££ I'd just get a deep cleaner in.

 

[Webbo2]

We have a cleaner in twice a week for £17 an hourly session, £34 well spent. We also have strict rules about using the bog brush every time and spills not being left.

Bog brushes are one of the most disgusting things man kind has invented. Why would you use something to clean faeces then put it in a pot covered in said faeces.

 

[Accy cyclist]

Just do 15 -20 minutes here and there if you really struggle with it.
I do that with the garden as I loathe gardening. Doing a whole morning or day would be too much.
But if yours is really bad then for the sake of a few ££ I'd just get a deep cleaner in.

I'm not keen on strangers or anyone for that matter rooting through and around my flat. I'm also concerned about possible theft, which sounds bad but I have had stuff nicked before from workmen etc when living in my first private rental flat.