Worst song lyric...ever?

[Puddles]

I messed my pants

 

[EltonFrog]

May I offer these two banal lyrics for your consideration.

"You were working as a waitress in a cocktail bar
When I met you
I picked you out, I shook you up
And turned you around
Turned you into someone new
Now five years later on you've got the world at your feet
Success has been so easy for you
But don't forget it's me who put you where you are now
And I can put you back down too."

and

"...And the Christmas bells that ring there are the clanging chimes of doom
Well tonight thank God it's them instead of you
And there won't be snow in Africa this Christmastime
The greatest gift they'll get this year is life..."

I'm sure there are a lot worse, but when I hear these two songs, my armpits itch.

 

[Arjimlad]

"4AM in the morning, carried away by a moonlight shadow" mars an otherwise excellent song for me.

4AM clearly isn't the evening, afternoon, teatime or suppertime so why on earth did they have to add "in the morning" or could they not have just said "ripe and early one morning" or something like it.. bah. Please just get on with the guitar solo Mr Oldfield.

 

[Acyclo]

"Rhododendron it's a nice flower." from "Do The Strand" Lyrics by B. Ferry Esq.

And here it is in all it's bizarre glory:
View: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h2yGudJ_BQ0

I seem to remember the version on the live album 'Viva' being a stormer - "Eskimos and Geordies"

 

[Jimmy Doug]

On this thread are some pretty appealing ones!

Dog goes woof
Cat goes meow
Bird goes tweet
and mouse goes squeek

Cow goes moo
Frog goes croak
and the elephant goes toot

Ducks say quack
and fish go blub
and the seal goes ow ow ow ow ow

But theres one sound
That no one knows
What does the fox say?

Ring-ding-ding-ding-dingeringeding!
Gering-ding-ding-ding-dingeringeding!
Gering-ding-ding-ding-dingeringeding!
What the fox say?

Wa-pa-pa-pa-pa-pa-pow!
Wa-pa-pa-pa-pa-pa-pow!
Wa-pa-pa-pa-pa-pa-pow!
What the fox say?

Hatee-hatee-hatee-ho!
Hatee-hatee-hatee-ho!
Hatee-hatee-hatee-ho!
What the fox say?

Joff-tchoff-tchoffo-tchoffo-tchoff!
Tchoff-tchoff-tchoffo-tchoffo-tchoff!
Joff-tchoff-tchoffo-tchoffo-tchoff!
What the fox say?

Big blue eyes
Pointy nose
Chasing mice
and digging holes

Tiny paws
Up the hill
Suddenly youre standing still

Your fur is red
So beautiful
Like an angel in disguise

But if you meet
a friendly horse
Will you communicate by
mo-o-o-o-orse?
mo-o-o-o-orse?
mo-o-o-o-orse?

How will you speak to that
ho-o-o-o-orse?
ho-o-o-o-orse?
ho-o-o-o-orse?
What does the fox say?

Jacha-chacha-chacha-chow!
Chacha-chacha-chacha-chow!
Chacha-chacha-chacha-chow!
What the fox say?

Fraka-kaka-kaka-kaka-kow!
Fraka-kaka-kaka-kaka-kow!
Fraka-kaka-kaka-kaka-kow!
What the fox say?

A-hee-ahee ha-hee!
A-hee-ahee ha-hee!
A-hee-ahee ha-hee!
What the fox say?

A-oo-oo-oo-ooo!
Woo-oo-oo-ooo!
What does the fox say?

The secret of the fox
Ancient mystery
Somewhere deep in the woods
I know youre hiding
What is your sound?
Will we ever know?
Will always be a mystery
What do you say?

Youre my guardian angel
Hiding in the woods
What is your sound?

(Fox Sings)
Wa-wa-way-do Wub-wid-bid-dum-way-do Wa-wa-way-do

Will we ever know?

(Fox Sings)
Bay-budabud-dum-bam

I want to

(Fox sings)
Mama-dum-day-do

I want to
I want to know!

(Fox sings)
Abay-ba-da bum-bum bay-do


OMG! The first comment I saw on the lyrics site:

 

[Deleted member 23692]

I'll go with Yes - Going for the One

Get the idea cross around the track
Underneath the flank of thoroughbred racing chasers.
Getting the feel as a river flows.
Would you like to go 'n shoot the mountain masses?
And here you stand no taller than the grass sees.
And should you really chase so hard.
The truth of sport plays rings around you.

and there is plenty more bollocks wurdz to follow

But it's still a great tune

 

[ASC1951]

Anything by Cliff Richard.

 

[threebikesmcginty]

A terrific song, but Sham 69's Hurry Up Harry has sh!te lyrics (but maybe that was the point):

Now listen here Harry
If we're going down the pub
You'd better tell your mum and dad
And finish up your grub
I wish you'd listen to me
No, I don't want a cup of tea

S'beautiful, poetry.

 

[MontyVeda]

Anything by Cliff Richard.

hang your head in shame... and it's SIR CLIFF RICHARD to you!
I like tall speakers, i like small speakers is one of the best lyrics ever written.






a time for giving, a time for getting
a time for forgiving, a time for forgetting isn't.

 

[User6179]

I have a blue house with a blue window.
Blue is the colour of all that I wear.
Blue are the streets and all the trees are too.
I have a girlfriend and she is so blue.
Blue are the people here that walk around,
Blue like my corvette, it's standing outside.
Blue are the words I say and what I think.
Blue are the feelings that live inside me.
I'm blue da ba dee da ba die...

This is from Eiffel 65, no points for guessing the song title

 

[Yellow Fang]

This is the worst verse from I've Never Been to Me:

Oh, I've been to Nice and the Isle of Greece while I've sipped champagne on a yacht
I've moved like Harlow in Monte Carlo and showed 'em what I've got
I've been undressed by kings and I've seen some things that a woman ain't supposed to see
I've been to paradise, but I've never been to me

This one is also pretty bad:

Sometimes I've been to crying for unborn children that might have made me complete
But I took the sweet life, I never knew I'd be bitter from the sweet
I've spent my life exploring the subtle whoring that costs too much to be free
Hey lady......
I've been to paradise, (I've been to paradise)
But I've never been to me

 

[MontyVeda]

what about...

Jesus loves you yes he does
Jesus loves every one of us
Jesus was a lucky lad
He had a really famous dad

Jesus loves you yes he does
Jesus loves every one of us
He had a really good healing power
Healed lots of people per hour

Judas was a nasty man
He put Jesus in the can
Then he lay inside his tomb
Catacomb, catacomb, cataco-oo-oo-mb

self penned, circa 1992

 

[T.M.H.N.E.T]

2 Unlimited - No Limit

No no, no no no no, no no no no, no no there's no limit!
No no, no no no no, no no no no, no no there's no limit!

[A:] No no limits, we'll reach for the sky!
No valley to deep, no maintain to high
No no limits, won't give up the fight
We do what we want and we do it with pride

[R:] Let me hear you say Yeah!

[R:] Hard to the core, I feel the floor
When I'm on the stage, yo, yo'll ask for more
I'm on the ass, I know the last
I work real hard do you like my cash
Tick tick ticka tick take your time
When I'm goin' I'm goin' for mine
Open you ears and you will hear it
I tell you this 'cause there's no limit!

[A:] No no, no no no no, no no no no, no no there's no limit!
No no, no no no no, no no no no, no no there's no limit!


Eiffel 65 - Blue @ianrauk

Yo listen up here's a story
About a little guy that lives in a blue world
And all day and all night and everything he sees
Is just blue like him inside and outside
Blue is his house with a blue little window
And a blue corvette
And everything is blue for him and himself
And everybody around
'cause he ain't got nobody to listen to

I'm blue da ba dee da ba die...

I have a blue house with a blue window.
Blue is the colour of all that I wear.
Blue are the streets and all the trees are too.
I have a girlfriend and she is so blue.
Blue are the people here that walk around,
Blue like my corvette, it's standing outside.
Blue are the words I say and what I think.
Blue are the feelings that live inside me.

I'm blue da ba dee da ba die...


Cher - Believe

After love, after love [repeat]
No matter how hard I try
You keep pushing me aside
And I can't break through
There's no talking to you
So sad that you're leaving
Takes time to believe it
But after all is said and done
You're going to be the lonely one, Ohh Oh

[CHORUS:]
Do you believe in life after love
I can feel something inside me say
I really don't think you're strong enough,
Now
Do you believe in life after love
I can feel something inside me say
I really don't think you're strong enough,
Now

What am I supposed to do
Sit around and wait for you
And I can't do that
There's no turning back
I need time to move on
I need love to feel strong
'Cause I've had time to think it through
And maybe I'm too good for you Ohh Oh

Haddaway - What is love


What is love
Oh baby, don't hurt me
Don't hurt me no more
Oh, baby don't hurt me
Don't hurt me no more

What is love
Yeah

Oh, I don't know why you're not there
I give you my love, but you don't care
So what is right and what is wrong
Gimme a sign

What is love
Oh baby, don't hurt me
Don't hurt me no more
What is love
Oh baby, don't hurt me
Don't hurt me no more

Whoa whoa whoa, oooh oooh
Whoa whoa whoa, oooh oooh

Oh, I don't know, what can I do
What else can I say, it's up to you
I know we're one, just me and you
I can't go on


DJ Gunther - Ding dong song

oh, you touch my tralala,
mmm... my ding ding dong.
la la la la la la la,
la la la la la la,
la la la la la la la.
Oh, you touch my tralala
la la la la la la la,
la la la la la la.
mmm... my ding ding dong.
la la la la la la la,
la la la la la la.

Deep in the night,
i'm looking for some fun,
deep in the night,
i'm looking for some love.
de-de-de-deep in the night,
i'm looking for some fun,
deep in the night,
i'm looking for some (ping)

You tease me,
oh please me,
i want you to be my lovetoy,
come near me, don't fear me,
i just can't get enough of you boy.

 

[User6179]

what about...

Jesus loves you yes he does
Jesus loves every one of us
Jesus was a lucky lad
He had a really famous dad

Jesus loves you yes he does
Jesus loves every one of us
He had a really good healing power
Healed lots of people per hour

Judas was a nasty man
He put Jesus in the can
Then he lay inside his tomb
Catacomb, catacomb, cataco-oo-oo-mb

self penned, circa 1992

OMG, that wins

 

[User6179]

View: http://youtu.be/RG0QKaaLTCE