We used to take it in turns to buy milk for the tea fund in the custody area. The unwritten rule was that you helped yourself but if it ran out when your team was on you sent someone out to get some more. The Sergeant on the team that we took over from had to be different. He decided he would buy his own as this arrangement was too informal.
One day I came on to find a note from him accusing our team of nicking his milk. A quick discussion with my team and I was happy none of ours had done it. We carried on as normal.
I went to the fridge later to make a brew and saw that he had used a sharpie to mark the level of his pint of semi skimmed, and sealed the cap on with an address label which he'd signed, and covered with sellotape so it was tamper proof.
Never one to miss out on a challenge I spent a happy few minutes raiding the drink driving kit in the Doctors surgery, and used one of the blood sample syringes to syphon out half of his remaining milk by puncturing the bottle under the corner of the supplier's label to hide the tiny puncture mark. . I squirted the milk I'd removed into a sterile urine sample container and labelled it "Sergeant XXXXX. Just in case you thought we were taking the pi$$, love from team 4"
A quick rerun of the CCTV tapes the next night showed him going a very strange shade of purple, then puzzlement, turning to anger when he found the sample bottle and read the label.
