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Aaargh!! Twenty Inch now Forty Inch!!

Discussion in 'Training, Fitness and Health' started by Twenty Inch, 7 Jan 2008.

  1. Twenty Inch

    Twenty Inch New Member

    Location:
    Behind a desk
    Dismay and consternation in Twenty Inch Towers yesterday as I stared at the tape measure. Had someone cut 6 inches off the end? Had I used the wrong end? No and No. My waistline is now really 40 inches, and my weight 97kg – 15st3lbs in old money.

    My waist is keeping pace with my age, and I’ve put on 2kg a year since 2000, the year of my athletic highpoint, the Isle of Arran Half-Ironman Triathlon.

    Since yesterday afternoon, I now own a bathroom scales, a tape measure, and a copy of the GI Diet book.

    According to that book, I should lose 1lb a week by following its principles. So far so good! In six months, I should weigh 85kg. This remains to be seen, but I need to try.

    Wish me luck!
     
  2. domtyler

    domtyler Über Member

    Do yourself a favour mate, get one of these:

    http://www.greatjohn.com/grjoreto.html
     
  3. Blue

    Blue Legendary Member

    Location:
    Ireland
    Just try to reduce food intake a little and increase exercise output a little. You may find the lard will shift. I think it's called the calorie equation or some such thing :biggrin:
     
  4. Crackle

    Crackle Pah Staff Member

    Location:
    Wirral
  5. Blue

    Blue Legendary Member

    Location:
    Ireland
    Didn't you see the picture of the expected customer types under the "why buy" link on the site!!
     
  6. Twenty Inch

    Twenty Inch New Member

    Location:
    Behind a desk
    Do you think? I think I have an addiction problem and I'm going to blame it on society.
     
  7. Crackle

    Crackle Pah Staff Member

    Location:
    Wirral

    I didn't.

    I'm now wondering how Dom knew of this contraption?
     
  8. Twenty Inch

    Twenty Inch New Member

    Location:
    Behind a desk
    Aaargh! It's not working! I've been on this diet ALL DAY and I'm FIVE POUNDS HEAVIER than when I started.

    *feels depressed, eats donut and cheddar cheese sandwich, feels suicidal*
     
  9. Crackle

    Crackle Pah Staff Member

    Location:
    Wirral
    Did you get the relaxation tape that's supposed to come with it?
     
  10. domtyler

    domtyler Über Member

    Tell me you're not thinking of the Great John! Forget getting fit, who wants to be slim when you can relax on your new Great John with a four pack of beers and a family sized bucket of fried chicken plus extra fries and a large strawberry milkshake!
     
  11. Blue

    Blue Legendary Member

    Location:
    Ireland
    How come we are talking about fat blokes on a toilet the day before the anniversary of the birth of the most famous fat guy to die on the bog?

    I'll have a deep fried peanut butter sandwich with that, thanks. :wacko:
     
  12. Blue

    Blue Legendary Member

    Location:
    Ireland
    PUT DOWN THE KNIFE AND FORK AND STAND AWAY FROM THE TABLE :wacko:
     
  13. Twenty Inch

    Twenty Inch New Member

    Location:
    Behind a desk
    *shlurp, crunch*

    Why? *burp*
     
  14. Twenty Inch

    Twenty Inch New Member

    Location:
    Behind a desk
  15. Twenty Inch

    Twenty Inch New Member

    Location:
    Behind a desk
    95kg and 39 inches today! Yippee!