Any good jokes ... ?

[tyred]

View attachment 657835

It's never worked for me🤔

 

[All uphill]

I hate it when people try to sound intelligent and talk about Mozart when they have never even seen one of his paintings.

When we bought this house we found a violin and an oil painting in the loft.

The local auctioneer said they were a Stradivarius and a Rembrandt.

Unfortunately Rembrandt made rubbish violins and Stradivarius couldn't paint for toffee.

 

[Andy in Germany]

It's never worked for me🤔

More practice required.

 

[PaulB]

Sadly, the days of proper English usage are went.

 

[tyred]

 

[PaulB]

Last night, my wife said to me, 'Do you remember that massive row we had twenty years ago when we agreed to cool off and write down a list of the other's faults?' I laughed and said I did and I could probably still find mine somewhere. She said, 'I've just finished mine.'

 

[tyred]

 

[PaulB]

My kids have been playing Scrabble and throwing the letters at each other. They won't be laughing if someone loses an i.

 

[VelvetUnderpants]

 

[Cavalol]

Today's question: Freud - Austrian neurologist, or how an Irishman likes his eggs?

 

[PeteXXX]

 

[Andy_R]

Limbo dancer walked into a bar.....

 

[tyred]

 

[PeteXXX]

MOT Advisory

 

[Andy in Germany]

Limbo dancer walked into a bar.....

A musician walked past a bar.