Any good jokes ... ?

[Cavalol]

My girlfriend left me because of my obsession with horoscopes.

It Taurus apart.

 

[CharlesF]

In your bed:
It's 7AM, you close your eyes for 5mins, & it's 8:45.

At work:
It's 14:30, you close your eyes for 5mins, & it's 14:29.

 

[PeteXXX]

Early Selfie... 🤳

 

[Chris S]

View attachment 502207

Early Selfie... 🤳

When I was young a 'selfie' was something rude

 

[Nibor]

 

[Cavalol]

Doctor, Doctor! I feel like a Welsh seaside resort in winter’.

‘Hmm. It sounds like you're Rhyl’

 

[colly]

I've got a habit of quoting Elton John lyrics.

I hope you don't mind. I hope you don't mind.

 

[Cavalol]

I asked this girl at work why she's still dating a scruffy homeless bloke who thinks he's Elvis.

She replied, "I'm courting a tramp! I can't walk out"

 

[betty swollocks]

 

[Joey Shabadoo]

View attachment 502283

Rebbecca Long Bailey leads the protests at the closure of Salford docks

 

[morrisman]

Just heard the world paper tearing champion has died.
RIP

 

[Cavalol]

I have some racing geese for sale, so let me know if you fancy a quick gander.

 

[Cavalol]

It's easy to convince ladies not to eat Tide Pods, but harder to deter gents.

 

[Cavalol]

 

[Joey Shabadoo]

Wichita Assistant Referee shurely?