numbnuts
Legendary Member
- Location
- Gone over the hill and far away
Hello the sun must have come out 
and it's that time of the year 
and it's that time of the year 
Best hair removal
- Thread starter stefan-west1
- Start date
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Globalti
Legendary Member
If you read the very excellent "The Escape Artist" by Matt Seaton, he explains the reasons for leg-shaving: firstly, it helps with massage (and is therefore only really required for racers and professionals) and secondly it's simply to do with the aesthetics and the look; Seaton reckons a rider with hairy legs would get laughed out of the peloton. As a side benefit shaved legs make it easier for an experienced cyclist to assess the build and the muscles of the rider in front and get an idea whether he's likely to be a rouler or a sprinter or a climber.
A third benefit is that yes, shaved legs would be slightly easier to clean and less painful when removing dressings.
I shaved my legs once and it was a complete pain; it took ages and clogged the drain. Never again. Those with curly hair ought to be aware of the possibility of folliculitis where a tightly curled hair recedes after cutting then pushes through the walls of the follicle rather than come out cleanly, causing rashes and infections which turn into boils.
If you're bothered about it, buy a hair trimmer and fit the depth limiter then trim leg hair down to a couple of mm.
A third benefit is that yes, shaved legs would be slightly easier to clean and less painful when removing dressings.
I shaved my legs once and it was a complete pain; it took ages and clogged the drain. Never again. Those with curly hair ought to be aware of the possibility of folliculitis where a tightly curled hair recedes after cutting then pushes through the walls of the follicle rather than come out cleanly, causing rashes and infections which turn into boils.
If you're bothered about it, buy a hair trimmer and fit the depth limiter then trim leg hair down to a couple of mm.
Tenacious Sloth
Guru
- Location
- Huntingdon, UK
Black & Decker orbital sander.
Has the added benefit of toughening your legs up ready for an 'off'.
Graham
Has the added benefit of toughening your legs up ready for an 'off'.
Graham
Dayvo
just passin' through
- Location
- 59° 50′ 5.55″ N, 10° 47′ 41.89″ E
Back and sack, OK.
Crack...!?
Don't Shave That Hair!!!
I have recently made a mistake in my life, and I offer my story to you, that you may learn from my error. It all started, as many things do, with me having trouble.
No, I was not constipated; this was not a regularity problem but a matter of technique. It seems my butt-hair had grown to such a length that tiny grogans were constantly getting tied up in the matted jungle between my buttcheeks. It led to much frustration, with me KNOWING that I still had something to drop, but unable to shake the tenacious turd loose from its butthair dwelling. Eventually I would have to do two things: either reach down with some paper and try to pinch off the lingering loaf (which required careful precision to avoid smearing the creature all over my rear, especially since I had no way of seeing what I was doing) or just go for broke, start wiping, and hope that I could remove all the leftover fecal matter before the toilet paper reached its Can't-Be-Flushed threshold.
I was contemplating this problem, when I had what seemed at the time to be a bright idea. "Hey! This is my butt and my butt-hair, right? So why don't I just eliminate all the hair, and then my grogans will flow out like beer from a keg!" I said to myself. It is a statement that will go down in history with a lot of other regretted statements. "How many Indians could there be?" said by General Custer. "Looks like a good day for a drive!" by JFK. "There! America On-Line now has complete Usenet access!" by some idiot system tech. Such was my anal shaving idea.
I performed the operation that night, with a cheap disposable razor and a towel to sit on. Starting from the bottom, and shaving from the crack to the cheeks, I began the arduous process of ridding my butt of hair. Occassionally, I would have to clean the razor of accumulated hair and miscellaneous slime, which I did by wiping it on the towel. Slowly, my twin mounds and the between-ravine began to resemble the hairless cheeks of a newborn baby. Finally, I wiped the razor one last time, and surveyed my work. The towel was covered with a pile of hair. My butt was smooth as ivory. I smiled, satisfied, thinking my troubles were over.
Little did I know.
I now have a great respect for anal-hair. Like everything in this world God created, it has its mighty purpose in existence. It was only after I had removed it that I started to learn how much I had been taking it for granted. For one, it provides friction. I learned this the next day, when I walked out into the sun heading for class. After climbing two flights of stairs and starting to sweat, I started to notice something unpleasant. The sweat was accumulating in my crack, and was causing the unpleasant sensation of my two buttcheaks sliding past each other with every step. I thought about going to the bathroom and wiping it off, but had to get to class. Eventually, I thought, it would dry.
Unfortunately, it did dry, but only after mingling with the microscopic poo- molecules lingering around my brown starfish. When I stood up after class, my cheeks were stuck together with a slimy sticky ****/sweat combination. As I made my way back to my dorm, it started to itch. God-DAMN, did it itch! Felt like a swarm of ants was making its way up and down my crack. Fighting to keep from jamming my hand down there and scratching away, I rushed back to the dorm.
Unfortunately again, this exertion caused me to sweat, and when I finally reached my room, my cheeks were sliding back and forth against each other like a pair of horny cane-toads. I quickly dropped my pants, and attempted to dry my butt off by sticking it in front of a fan and spreading my cheeks. As I pulled the two mounds of flesh apart, a horrible stench burst free and filled the room. Every dog within a 4 block radius started to howl. I had it worst of all, as the ripe aroma of festering ****/sweat went into the fan and blew back into my face. I fought to keep from heaving. And as I sat there, fighting vomit, my butt cheeks spread and dripping, with the concentrated aroma of my body odor mixed with the tangy smell of my own **** blowing right into my face, I had only one thought: "It will be like this until the hair grows back. Weeks."
Later on, trying to deal as best I could, wiping my butt at every opportunity, I discovered another wonderful use for butt-hair - ventilation. I attempted to launch a fart, only to have it get stuck between my buttcheeks. Apparently, with no hair, the two pink twins can get vacuum sealed together, and the result was a frustrating fart that slid up and down between my cheeks like a lost gerbil.
As if that wasn't enough, I am now enduring further torture. As anyone who has ever shaved anything knows, when hair is first growing in, it comes in as stubble. Imagine your butt having the texture of a brillo pad. Well, that is what I am dealing with now. It is a hellish torture, and there are many times when I just look out the window and contemplate why I shouldn't just jump out and get it all over with in one fleshy splat, rather than endure this constant agony.
Guys, DON'T SHAVE YOUR BUTT-HAIR!
Crack...!?
Don't Shave That Hair!!!
I have recently made a mistake in my life, and I offer my story to you, that you may learn from my error. It all started, as many things do, with me having trouble.
No, I was not constipated; this was not a regularity problem but a matter of technique. It seems my butt-hair had grown to such a length that tiny grogans were constantly getting tied up in the matted jungle between my buttcheeks. It led to much frustration, with me KNOWING that I still had something to drop, but unable to shake the tenacious turd loose from its butthair dwelling. Eventually I would have to do two things: either reach down with some paper and try to pinch off the lingering loaf (which required careful precision to avoid smearing the creature all over my rear, especially since I had no way of seeing what I was doing) or just go for broke, start wiping, and hope that I could remove all the leftover fecal matter before the toilet paper reached its Can't-Be-Flushed threshold.
I was contemplating this problem, when I had what seemed at the time to be a bright idea. "Hey! This is my butt and my butt-hair, right? So why don't I just eliminate all the hair, and then my grogans will flow out like beer from a keg!" I said to myself. It is a statement that will go down in history with a lot of other regretted statements. "How many Indians could there be?" said by General Custer. "Looks like a good day for a drive!" by JFK. "There! America On-Line now has complete Usenet access!" by some idiot system tech. Such was my anal shaving idea.
I performed the operation that night, with a cheap disposable razor and a towel to sit on. Starting from the bottom, and shaving from the crack to the cheeks, I began the arduous process of ridding my butt of hair. Occassionally, I would have to clean the razor of accumulated hair and miscellaneous slime, which I did by wiping it on the towel. Slowly, my twin mounds and the between-ravine began to resemble the hairless cheeks of a newborn baby. Finally, I wiped the razor one last time, and surveyed my work. The towel was covered with a pile of hair. My butt was smooth as ivory. I smiled, satisfied, thinking my troubles were over.
Little did I know.
I now have a great respect for anal-hair. Like everything in this world God created, it has its mighty purpose in existence. It was only after I had removed it that I started to learn how much I had been taking it for granted. For one, it provides friction. I learned this the next day, when I walked out into the sun heading for class. After climbing two flights of stairs and starting to sweat, I started to notice something unpleasant. The sweat was accumulating in my crack, and was causing the unpleasant sensation of my two buttcheaks sliding past each other with every step. I thought about going to the bathroom and wiping it off, but had to get to class. Eventually, I thought, it would dry.
Unfortunately, it did dry, but only after mingling with the microscopic poo- molecules lingering around my brown starfish. When I stood up after class, my cheeks were stuck together with a slimy sticky ****/sweat combination. As I made my way back to my dorm, it started to itch. God-DAMN, did it itch! Felt like a swarm of ants was making its way up and down my crack. Fighting to keep from jamming my hand down there and scratching away, I rushed back to the dorm.
Unfortunately again, this exertion caused me to sweat, and when I finally reached my room, my cheeks were sliding back and forth against each other like a pair of horny cane-toads. I quickly dropped my pants, and attempted to dry my butt off by sticking it in front of a fan and spreading my cheeks. As I pulled the two mounds of flesh apart, a horrible stench burst free and filled the room. Every dog within a 4 block radius started to howl. I had it worst of all, as the ripe aroma of festering ****/sweat went into the fan and blew back into my face. I fought to keep from heaving. And as I sat there, fighting vomit, my butt cheeks spread and dripping, with the concentrated aroma of my body odor mixed with the tangy smell of my own **** blowing right into my face, I had only one thought: "It will be like this until the hair grows back. Weeks."
Later on, trying to deal as best I could, wiping my butt at every opportunity, I discovered another wonderful use for butt-hair - ventilation. I attempted to launch a fart, only to have it get stuck between my buttcheeks. Apparently, with no hair, the two pink twins can get vacuum sealed together, and the result was a frustrating fart that slid up and down between my cheeks like a lost gerbil.
As if that wasn't enough, I am now enduring further torture. As anyone who has ever shaved anything knows, when hair is first growing in, it comes in as stubble. Imagine your butt having the texture of a brillo pad. Well, that is what I am dealing with now. It is a hellish torture, and there are many times when I just look out the window and contemplate why I shouldn't just jump out and get it all over with in one fleshy splat, rather than endure this constant agony.
Guys, DON'T SHAVE YOUR BUTT-HAIR!
briantrumpet
Legendary Member
- Location
- Devon & Die
Though that sometimes just encourages gravity to relocate the hair from the top of the head to other parts of the body.
Arjimlad
Tights of Cydonia
- Location
- South Glos
Get some of this
kendraallen
Regular
n
nice sharing!!Hi all,
I'm new to this whole cycling stuff but now that I've started I've decided what they hell and gonna try the whole hairless legs haha. You've gotta try it at least once haven't you
So what would you all say is probably the best way of doing this in your opinions?
Shaving
Waxing
Veet
Or even stealing the mrs' epilator :S (ouch)
... What's the worst that could happen
OnTheRopes
Regular
From much personal experience:
Don't shave until the legs are coming out in the spring
Don't use a razor for the first shave of the season or you will end up looking like you have been slaughtering chickens in the bath.
Don't use one of those contraptions for ladies that yank the hairs out it is very painful and doesn't actually work!
You can use Veet or similar it works quite well but is a bit of a mess and you will have to finish off with a razor.
The best way I have found is use something like a beard trimmer to take it down to a couple of mm and then a razor to finish off.
Once the first shave of the season is completed you will need to maintain it. I used to use an electric razor which is quite effective but you will need to do it at least once a week as a minimum, preferably twice and your legs will need to be bone dry, no sweat or dampness at all.
Nowadays I use a razor once a week or when I need to.
Don't shave until the legs are coming out in the spring
Don't use a razor for the first shave of the season or you will end up looking like you have been slaughtering chickens in the bath.
Don't use one of those contraptions for ladies that yank the hairs out it is very painful and doesn't actually work!
You can use Veet or similar it works quite well but is a bit of a mess and you will have to finish off with a razor.
The best way I have found is use something like a beard trimmer to take it down to a couple of mm and then a razor to finish off.
Once the first shave of the season is completed you will need to maintain it. I used to use an electric razor which is quite effective but you will need to do it at least once a week as a minimum, preferably twice and your legs will need to be bone dry, no sweat or dampness at all.
Nowadays I use a razor once a week or when I need to.
Ming the Merciless
There is no mercy
- Location
- Inside my skull
Sorry, can't come out riding today, I am waxing my legs.
