Customised Coffins - what would you choose?

[cyberknight]

I'm pretty sure I have the original box I came in, somewhere in the loft.

you keep your mum in the loft just in case ?

 

[Profpointy]

I quite like the idea of some sort of jack-in-the-box setup.

There was an account of a conversation between two old friends of mine, both no longer with us. For context they were in a long tedious journey in a landrover so each sentence had quite a pause to the next one as they were killing time really. Anyhow the subject of gold teeth had somehow come up, and one guy says "I've got a gold tooth. I've left it to <such and such> in my will". "Why have you done that? you can't stand the man", "The terms of the will say he has to extract it himself". "Well you know what a tight arse he is; he'll do it". "I shall bite him" "you won't be able to bite him; you'll be dead". "I have arranged with my undertaker to install a spring loaded device". Knowing the guy in question, a distinguished engineer who'd designed the gearboxes for the Brabazon and maybe also Scorpion tank, they did wonder if he really had ! As it happened his enemy died first so we never found out.

 

[steveindenmark]

Anything that burns quick will do me. 🙂

 

[DRM]

This should create a nice fuss on the Leeds/Liverpool canal, it‘s guaranteed to get people talking

 

[Scotchlovingcylist]

I'm pretty sure I have the original box I came in, somewhere in the loft.

But did you keep your instructions, I lost mine years ago which may explain a few things.

For me cremation and scattered.
Or my ashes placed inside my seat tube so I can keep riding 😁

 

[classic33]

I expect there will be a new fad by the time I'm dead; maybe digital projection. No-one is going to see it apart from a few minutes when I'm lowered in, so for me it will be the cheapest/biodegradable one I would think. I'd rather spend money on a party afterwards

There's holographic projection.
https://www.cremationsolutions.com/...he-dead-to-attend-their-own-funerals/2014/05/

 

[Accy cyclist]

I'd like one that looks like an art deco teak wardrobe, or maybe one that looks like one of those old tan leather suitcases with buckled straps. 🤔

 

[Andy in Germany]

There's a local system to get around the "Burial Only" rule in Germany; the deceased is cremated, then the undertakers take it on a boat onto the Bodensee. When they reach the Swiss border there's a short service and the ashes are tipped out on the Swiss side of the boat.

Personally I think it would be more interesting to use a cannon, but that's probably an act of war...

 

[Richard A Thackeray]

My mother-in-law chose (in advance) one of those woollen/compacted cardboard coffins
It looked very good indeed

We did get some curious looks though, at the service venue, Wakefield Cathedral;
- Our daughter was a chorister there for about 10 years
- My wife was one of the Wardens
- M-in-L was a volunteer

They offered the use of it, which we accepted, but if anyone readng this knows Wakefield, the Cathedral is in the pedestrianised area, so we had to drive in (hearse & 3 mourners cars)
We had shoppers stopping, looking in the windows, trying to see if it was anyone famous/well--known

I was told afterwards, but I didn't see it, that a Police Officer on patrol, stopped & removed his hat out of tradition/respect

View attachment 637977
This should create a nice fuss on the Leeds/Liverpool canal, it‘s guaranteed to get people talking

Or, more locally to me, the Aire & Calder Navigation Canal!

 

[Bonefish Blues]

View attachment 637937

Pop a few ventilation holes in - can't be too careful.

 

[Time Waster]

Put me in the compost heap in my levis and t shirt. Preferably after I've died.

The zip, rivets, etc will not degrade in the soil. Can I suggest a 100% organic cotton tracksuit with organic glued footwear using non synthetic materials? Don't forget to ensure your glasses get sent to charity to be reused and any false parts are recycled if possible.

BTW aiui there's a history of gardeners in France putting old, worn out clothes into a double depth trench with other natural waste material before planting above it in the trench. Iirc there's an old French gardening "Bible" that has this very old and traditional approach in it. That's if a few posters on a gardening forum are not collectively fibbing.

 

[All uphill]

The zip, rivets, etc will not degrade in the soil. Can I suggest a 100% organic cotton tracksuit with organic glued footwear using non synthetic materials? Don't forget to ensure your glasses get sent to charity to be reused and any false parts are recycled if possible.

BTW aiui there's a history of gardeners in France putting old, worn out clothes into a double depth trench with other natural waste material before planting above it in the trench. Iirc there's an old French gardening "Bible" that has this very old and traditional approach in it. That's if a few posters on a gardening forum are not collectively fibbing.

Good points.

I remember my Dad burying an old mattress in the garden in the hope that it would retain moisture and improve the very sandy soil!

 

[Mr Celine]

Straight to cremation for the pair of us; none of the default rollocks.

Cardboard coffins will do.

Ashes to Scout Scar, Kendal - we both love it there plus our gorgeous dog is already in-situ. ☹️

Not customising but a witty set of stickers might be a laugh. 😅

There was an item on Channel 4 news last night about phosphate pollution in the lake district. Make sure you're scattered responsibly.

 

[SpokeyDokey]

There was an item on Channel 4 news last night about phosphate pollution in the lake district. Make sure you're scattered responsibly.

I think there was some concern a while back where people were having their ashes scattered on popular mountain summits.

The numbers were causing a high concentration of various contaminants in the localised areas.

 

[All uphill]

Cheapest one there is. They are going to burn it or bury it so why spend a lot?

I ‘d get one made out of all my ‘bags for life’ if it was acceptable to turn up at a crematorium or cemetery that way.

Bags for Death.

There's an opportunity!