Door-to-door salesman repellent

[Mad Doug Biker]

Had one the other day there - My Sister had been involved in a car accident a while back but hadn't been injured or anything.

Lo' and behold, I got a call from one of these Injury Compensation firms asking about the accident.

I just said we weren't interested and called them a bunch of money grabbing vultures before hanging up. I haven't heard from them since.

If you were wanting some money Sis, sorry!!

 

[Wobbly John]

The TPS stopped calls for a while, but now we get companies doing 'surveys'

I now see how much I can freak them out:

Try asking them to repeat their name.
Get them to spell it
Repeat it back to them using the phonetic alphabet.
Use at least one swear-word instead of the correct word from the phonetic alphabet.
Ask them the name of the company
Repeat it back to them but get one word wrong...
...consistently.

I've got more ideas, but haven't had any callers get past this stage yet.

 

[PBancroft]

Had one the other day there - My Sister had been involved in a car accident a while back but hadn't been injured or anything.

Lo' and behold, I got a call from one of these Injury Compensation firms asking about the accident.

Am getting those all the sodding time at the moment. About 8 months ago I had a minor accident, no one was injured but there was slightly damaged bodywork. For some reason these claims people think its an ideal case and keep harassing me.. I went to France a few weeks ago, and took my mobile with me for emergency reasons. They managed to call for the five minutes I had it switched on... so I get stung with the roaming charges. Thanks for that you ***ts.


I've decided that my new way of approaching the problem is to ask them to tell me more about their service, and then put my phone back in my pocket. Hopefully they'll just carry on talking to themselves for a bit in there.

I'm going to use the OP's sign, but I wonder how well it will work for the numpties who start their spiel with I'm not here to sell you anything mate before telling me about the great offers Brutish Gus* have to offer at the moment.

* May not be the real company name

 

[Globalti]

Tell them that the call may be recorded for training and security purposes.

 

[Spinney]

Tell them that the call may be recorded for training and security purposes.

I kept getting repeat calls from a firm selling time share - and I'd already been to one of their time-wasting presentations. For a while I kept making appointments and not turning up (so hopefully wasting several hours of a rep's time) - and the dozy lot still kept phoning me. I'm not sure why they've stopped now.

The last 'survey' I got started on the spiel about 'home security survey', so I said, 'and the survey will end with you offering to send someone round to do a proper survey, and he'll try to sell me an alarm system' - to give the lad credit he laughed, said I must be psychic and ended the call politely!

Summerdays - you could just make an appointment for a time when you know you'll be out. Do that a few times and they'll probably give up. And you've the satisfaction of wasting their time...

 

[beanzontoast]

BT keep ringing me to ask me to go back to BT for my phone calls. I'm thinking of complaining... to BT!

 

[ufkacbln]

I find asking for their details is the quickest way.

"I am on the Telephone Preference Service and you have breached regulation 21 of the Privacy and Communications Regulations and I require you r details for a formal complaint."

I never ever finish the sentence before they hang up

 

[XmisterIS]

I'm going to use the OP's sign, but I wonder how well it will work for the numpties who start their spiel with I'm not here to sell you anything mate

It seems to work even with them; the message on the sign couldn't be clearer! There was only one person who rang on the door trying to sell me frozen fish (yep, you read that correctly!). I asked him, "Can you read?" He said, "What? Well, of course, yes!" I pointed to the sign and said, "Well, you didn't bloody read that did you?" He then said, "How do you know you don't want what I'm selling?" The long and short of it is that I took his name and his company's name, I escorted him off my property and I put a complaint in writing to his company. He hasn't called since!

I find asking for their details is the quickest way.

"I am on the Telephone Preference Service and you have breached regulation 21 of the Privacy and Communications Regulations and I require you r details for a formal complaint."

I never ever finish the sentence before they hang up

Nice

 

[ufkacbln]

My wife however likes to play!

When we were being stalked by Bowater Zenith she took one call..

She asked if these were "plastic windows" and would replace her present plastic ones - she then proeeded to spend some thirty minutes discussing the sizes, and costs.

Eventually the caller tried to arrange to come and see us. At which point she replied - "I'll bring them to you - the Tent will fit in the boot"

Followed by a short discussion about how the salesperson had wasted her time by misleading him over the nature of the plastic windows they were selling!

 

[BrumJim]

Safestyle windows:
Informed discussion over the environmental and long-term aesthetic issues with white uPVC windows.

Also, have heard stories about exploitation of the weak and vulnerable, in over-pricing windows. Ask the caller how they feel about working for such an un-ethical company. If they would like it if it happened to their Gran. How they sleep at night. Encourage them to hand their notice in as a protest.

Eventually gets rid of them, and you feel you have done a little bit for a better world.

 

[Brains]

The TPS service actually does work to a degree, our calls have gone down from about one a day to about one a month

People flogging windows over the phone - the answer is that you may be interested, but as you live in a conservation area they need to be wooden framed leaded windows, do they supply them ? Nooooo

 

[Fab Foodie]

I find asking for their details is the quickest way.

"I am on the Telephone Preference Service and you have breached regulation 21 of the Privacy and Communications Regulations and I require you r details for a formal complaint."

I never ever finish the sentence before they hang up

I also do this and it works a treat.

 

[mcshroom]

I seem to dissuade most from calling back when I inform them that I'm a tennant and don't own the flat.

We used to get Safestyle ringing my parents home when I was at University. I got rid of them when I was home for the summer by spending a good hour pricing up, repeating, and changing my mind on lots of different window products, going and finding my diary (well get a drink from the kitchen but they thought I was finding my diary) and basically keeping them on the phone. Then I informed them it wasn't my house.

 

[Arch]

I seem to dissuade most from calling back when I inform them that I'm a tennant and don't own the flat.

We used to get Safestyle ringing my parents home when I was at University. I got rid of them when I was home for the summer by spending a good hour pricing up, repeating, and changing my mind on lots of different window products, going and finding my diary (well get a drink from the kitchen but they thought I was finding my diary) and basically keeping them on the phone. Then I informed them it wasn't my house.

"Oh, sorry, it's not my house, I'm just burgling it...."

I don't suppose many window companies would be interested in me - I'm a tenant, I suspect my windows would have to be conservation grade, and I only have two of them anyway!

 

[Archie_tect]

I always ask how they got my home number as it's ex-directory, or if it's the office I ask why they are ringing a commercial line... they usually hang up on the spot.