Downstairs neighbour. I am looking for advice

[Saluki]

I had forgotten about Xenophon, I had forgotten about the Stoics too. @Thomk & @asterix, if I could have liked your posts more than once, I would have done. The Xenophon thing has really helped I actually think, that in this case, its the way to go.
Lassie who is next door, upstairs has no issue with us and Malcom downstairs under the Lass says that he never hears us but says that he is mostly drunk when he's home anyway. I am not sure if that actually counts. He has a serious drinking problem, bless him, but is a really nice chap when sober.

The other side, the flats nearest to us have a builder chap who has never told us his name and a nice girl called Verity in the upstairs flat. They never hear a thing, although we hear her Pink Floyd from time to time. She has excellent taste in music. Next to her is a drug addict but a great guitarist, under him is Simon the lorry driver, very lovely chap. They all like us and a couple of them think that we are 'cool'

I would just like to say that I have never had a bad neighbour, ever. This is a first for us.

Ken is torn between learning bass guitar or drums at the moment. I vote drums

 

[ComedyPilot]

I vote Flamenco dancing

 

[classic33]

I vote Flamenco dancing

Nah, they'd have to lift the carpet they put down when they moved in. It requires a hard floor surface.

 

[ComedyPilot]

Nah, they'd have to lift the carpet they put down when they moved in. It requires a hard floor surface.

Flamenco dancing in the genre Film Noir - silent version?

 

[hopless500]

Hi all.

I am looking for a bit of advice here as I am at the end of my tether now and about to go out for a long bike ride to get out of the flat.
Our downstairs neighbour says that we are being unreasonably noisy and that we disturb her all the time.
She complained about the noise the day we moved in. We were moving in for pity's sake, its tricky to do silently.
She complained when we hoovered. So we now only hoover when she is out.

I should say that she works nights and is abed by 5pm. She wakes us up most mornings between 12.30am and 2am. We have checked with the local council and they say that we can make 'reasonable noise' from 7am to 11pm and that as a night worker she has little in the way of rights about us living our lives.

She says that she can hear the TV so we have it on really quietly with the subtitles on.
She says she can hear us talking so we whisper to each other.
She complained that our using our garden, at 6pm out enjoying the sun, disturbed her and was really grumpy so we went in and we haven't used the garden or done gardening when she is home since.
We never play our guitars after 6pm.
The dogs walk about and disturb her. I have looked into 'levitation for dogs' but cannot find a copy anywhere so can't teach them that one.
The dogs woof when someone comes to the door sometimes - not all the time though, just occasionally, and it disturbs her.
She complains when our dogs go into our garden in case they hurt her cats, so the dogs don't go in the garden now.
We don't play the radio when she is home.


Today I lost it with her, a bit. I told her that trying to be silent when she is home is making me ill. I haven't worked much this last week or so as I am so stressed out. I keep dropping my scissors and can barely speak on the phone.
I decided to make a point and asked her if she could hear our music (We set the hi-fi up yesterday evening but didn't turn it on until 10am today while she was out) and she said that we played it really loudly.
We asked if she could hear us playing AC/DC and she said that it disturbed her often. My ex hubby stole all my rock music and a new (to us) AC/DC cd arrived today. Its the only one we have. We asked about AC/DC just so we could see if she was making stuff up.

Ken (hubby) then said "sorry if we disturbed you playing our guitars until gone 9pm last night". She said that she was disturbed and that she knocked on several times but we were being so loud that she couldn't make herself heard. We have electric guitars, apparently. I'm looking across at them now and they are still acoustics, they haven't morphed in to a pair of Les Paul Customs or owt.
Last night we were at a guitar lesson. We left the house at 6.30pm and didn't get back in until gone 10pm. Yup we played loud (learning Back to Black at the mo) but we were 12 miles away in Norwich. That woman must have ears like a bat.

She's now been around ranting (really ranting) that we have made noise all day. We told her through the week that we were decorating and laying new flooring today. She's had 4 days warning. We have to do it all in one hit as we have a 4' fish tank and a 2'8" fish tank. Its all done now. We started at 9 - while she was out and we finished everything by 3.45pm and then walked the dogs but its disturbed her.

Am I being unreasonable. We are living like Anne Frank, I am on the verge of a breakdown. I am here quietly, listening to music on my iPod, with headphones

Just been downstairs and she said that she can here the 'effing Manic Street effing Preachers'. She banged so hard on the door it set next door's dogs off too. If she can hear the Manic's while I am listening to Thunder on my iPod she must have bionic ears and picking up someone else's music.

Advice please, anyone?
Oh, we cannot move until May 13th 2014. We've looked at that route. We have considered buying a touring caravan and going back homeless but we don't really want to do that as we waited a long time for any sort of housing and Ken is on dialysis so its not practical.

Sorry for long post but I thought that I would type up the situation reasonably fully.

Blimey Saluki - poor you (and Ken). I have no idea what solution is, but she sounds unreasonable to say the least.

 

[hopless500]

We realise this but the PC is in here at the moment as our our Guitars
We are going to buy new slippers later (and fish food Ken says) and see if we can find a couple of cheap rugs to throw down, ones that are thin enough to go through the wash. I am probably going to knit some new rugs from old tee shirts later. I find knitting nearly as calming as playing my guitar. My life is very rock n roll.
I am happy to go a little way to noise dampening, especially over the cushion flooring as it is not as good at sound dampening as carpet, but after your lovely responses we are much happier that we are not actually demons here. We will take sensible measures and then she can do what she likes.

Last night she was having the loudest conversation with her friends until the dot of 11pm. They were doing that forced laughter thing and were actually louder than our TV. We sat in our living room, watching something or other, giggling like kids about it. We could hear every single word, clearly. We don't have the TV on loudly and we mute the bloomin' adverts. Silly silly woman.
We have decided to look for an exchange come May. Its not worth the stress.
Having had a good night's sleep, I am feeling a lot more positive. I will have a chat to my GP about the anxiety of it all when I go for my knee check up this week so there will be a note of it should she try to make something up again.

Roys in Dereham have some pretty cheap and cheerful rag rugs. All different sizes, and the blood stains wash out just fine!

 

[Fnaar]

Hang down from your windows, so you are looking through hers. Put white make up on, back comb your hair and make ghost noises.

 

[Globalti]

We tried that. We got a very stiff "I don't really drink". I suggested a cuppa and a bun but she wanted me to put the dogs in the car first and vacuum in case there were dog hairs. Quite likely in our house, hairs.

She's as mad as a box of frogs then.

 

[MrDampy]

Hi, just came across this.

Can you tell me is the flat rented down stairs, do you rent yours.
Have you Bought the Flat.
Lets start with these questions and I will go from there ok

 

[classic33]

Roys in Dereham have some pretty cheap and cheerful rag rugs. All different sizes, and the blood stains wash out just fine!

Why do you point out the fact that blood stains wash out? What have you in mind?

 

[Spinney]

Hi, just came across this.

Can you tell me is the flat rented down stairs, do you rent yours.
Have you Bought the Flat.
Lets start with these questions and I will go from there ok

That info is further up the thread...

 

[classic33]

That info is further up the thread...

He's only just joined, don't put him off so fast. Give him a week & then have another try.

 

[Saluki]

Hang down from your windows, so you are looking through hers. Put white make up on, back comb your hair and make ghost noises.

Funny you should say that. Every year we put a lit pumpkin out on the front step so the Trick or Treaters know that they can knock on and have sweets. This year will be no exception.

Roys in Dereham have some pretty cheap and cheerful rag rugs. All different sizes, and the blood stains wash out just fine!

Thanks, I'll wander over. I wonder if the Roys in Bowthorpe will have them too or the Roys on Magdalen Street. I will have a look through the week. I am just cutting up old tee shirts to knit into rugs. We've heard her doing big martyred sighs as the picnic table that I am cutting up on makes cutting up quite loud (not ever so loud, just loud enough for bat-ears)

 

[MrDampy]

That info is further up the thread...

Have looked, cany find the info I need to know before I give them advice, have scouted the pages here for the info I need

 

[DCLane]

@ComedyPilot - surely Flamenco, coupled with loud Argentinian Tango & subsequent after-dance noises