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Farting etiquette

Discussion in 'CycleChat Cafe' started by Bigtallfatbloke, 17 Jul 2007.

  1. Bigtallfatbloke

    Bigtallfatbloke New Member

    ...do you sit or stand on your bike to let rip?...for me it's a case of who is behind me....it's a serious question affecting the aerodynamics of my ride :blush: :eek: :laugh: :tongue:
     
  2. Maggot

    Maggot Star of BBC 5Lives Ballot Box Brigade

    Location:
    Cheddar
    We stayed away last weekend for my wifes birthday. Nice family room in a nice hotel. I let one go, quite subtly, and nearly killed the entire family. I was laid on the bed at the time, but gently lifted to one side if that helps :eek:
     
  3. barq

    barq Senior Member

    Location:
    Birmingham, UK
    If you are worried about aerodynamics you should surely be trying to use the fart as a form of propulsion. :eek:
     
  4. i refer you to my name :eek: :blush:
     
  5. Big Bren

    Big Bren New Member

    Location:
    Yorkshire
    I thought cycling was meant to be low emmissions?!

    Have you considered adding a lighter to your toolkit and attempting to revisit the popular schoolboy lark of lighting your farts? You never know - some form of crude jet propulsion may ensue? :eek:

    Bren
     
  6. Mister Paul

    Mister Paul Honky

    Location:
    North Somerset
    Farting is so much more fun when you're piloting a tandem.
     
  7. bof

    bof Senior member. Oi! Less of the senior please

    Location:
    The world
    Use a lighter - as shown in my avatar
     
  8. JamesAC

    JamesAC Senior Member

    Location:
    London
    I used to catch the 'bus to work, about 7:30 in the morning, very quiet.

    One day, I was standing there all on my own, when I felt the urge to "let one rip". So I did a splendidly sonorous and resounding rectal rasberry.

    Then I noticed, that un-beknown to me, half-a-dozen people had joined the Q behind me.

    They all looked a bit po-faced!!

    :eek:
     
  9. Mr Phoebus

    Mr Phoebus New Member

    Twist the handlebar grip like a throttle a few times as you let rip. :eek: :laugh: :blush:
     
  10. Fnaar

    Fnaar Smutmaster General

    Location:
    Thumberland
    A slight lift of one cheek is "de rigeur", I believe. Careful not to "follow though", though! :eek:
     
  11. Tetedelacourse

    Tetedelacourse New Member

    Location:
    Rosyth
    My 2 yr-old physically wretches if she catches the slightest whiff of one. Most embarrassing if you're at the in-laws and trying to ease the gutteral pressure of a Sunday lunch on the sly.

    I thought it was just me that had the power but Mrs DLC has since been uncovered as a sniper by mini as well. Better than a canary.
     
  12. I was getting some money out of a cashpoint in Greece a while ago. Because it was bright sunlight, I was hunched over the machine so I could read the screen. When I felt the urge to step on a duck, I did so, without realising that some poor woman had joined the queue and was standing right behind me. Oh, the shame. :tongue:
     
  13. Back on topic, I stand to drop air biscuits while on the bike. Often I need to freewheel too.
     
  14. Blue

    Blue Legendary Member

    Location:
    Ireland
    Reminds me of a retired teacher who cycles with my training group and always has the same retort when anyone lets rip ..... "come out brown, for talking"