Fat stain on leather settee

[threebikesmcginty]

Oh my that's one fugly piece of furniture!

It's like a massive turd coloured well err turd. No offence.

Best thing would be to drag it into the back garden, douse it with petrol and torch the fecker.

 

[jefmcg]

Ice cream and chocolate knock me out. Mind you that's probably because i've had 7 pints and three pies before.

Is this a slow suicide attempt?

Your couch is the least of your worries.

 

[Drago]

Are you sure it is ice cream?

I mean, if you were watching "One of those" Sky channels before you dozed off...

He does get rather excited over the Morris Dancing channel.

 

[threebikesmcginty]

He does get rather excited over the Morris Dancing channel.

My friend wants to know what channel that is?

 

[jefmcg]

Don't think there's much dairy in a cornetto

There's a ton of it, including the new-to-me Butteroil (as in: now we think that butter may not be that bad for you, lets mess with it until it is)

Reconstituted Skimmed Milk, Sugar, Vegetable Oils (Coconut, Palm), Wheat Flour, Glucose Fructose Syrup, Glucose Syrup, Hazelnut Pieces (2%), Butteroil, Cream (1,5%), Fat Reduced Cocoa Powder*, Whey Solids (Milk), Potato Starch, Emulsifiers (Mono- and Di-Glycerides of Fatty Acids, Sunflower Lecithin, Ammonium Phosphatides), Stabilisers (Locust Bean Gum, Guar Gum, Carrageenan), Skimmed Milk Powder, Salt, Caramelised Sugar Syrup, Flavourings (contains Milk), Wheat Starch, Milk Protein, Egg White, *Rainforest Alliance Certified™ Cocoa

 

[twentysix by twentyfive]

[QUOTE 4813260, member: 43827"]When I saw the title I thought the thread was about my brother-in-law.[/QUOTE]
Beat me to it there

 

[classic33]

It's like a massive turd coloured well err turd. No offence.

Best thing would be to drag it into the back garden, douse it with petrol and torch the fecker.

Price o petrol these days!

 

[User33236]

My friend wants to know what channel that is?

Not the old 'my friend' trick again?

 

[Accy cyclist]

Is this a slow suicide attempt?

Your couch is the least of your worries.

I need the calories.

 

[Markymark]

Fat stain on a sofa is how I imagine you.

 

[Crackle]

Cover it with palm.

 

[Dayvo]

Oh my that's one fugly piece of furniture!

Yebbut a blind man would like to see it.

 

[Yellow Saddle]

I wouldn't normally chose leather but i saw it in a charity shop and for the price i had to have it. It's one of these http://www.sofaitalia.co.uk/leather-sofas/knightsbridge-leather-sofa/ but not the one in the picture. I got it for £120 including delivery.

OK, that's chrome tan leather. That stuff is incredibly durable. You can basically wash it in a washing machine and it will come out perfect. You have to get soapy water in it and out of it. In other words, wash with plenty of soapy water (laundry detergent will do) and immediately get it out again. It is no use just smearing stuff in and wiping off. You want the lipid-attracting detergent to lock in the fat and then suck the solution out with your wet-dry vacuum cleaner. Wash and suck.*





*Wait for it.....suck will now elicit a zillion other comments.

 

[Cycleops]

Get the fat *****" to sit somewhere else!

 

[Drago]

My friend wants to know what channel that is?

You can tell your (cough) friend its channel 666.