fatherhood. When is it too late?

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srw

It's a bit more complicated than that...
For some people it will always be too soon.
 
On the otherhand she probably won't have to struggle to buy her first house because by the time she wants one the odds are she will have inherited his.
 

screenman

Legendary Member
We had our first when I was just 18 and the wife 17, their friends at school had brothers and sisters older than us. We had another at 23 and 22 and the last at 33 and 32, funny thing is I felt really old having kids that late in life.

My parents were 43 when I was born and a not so great suprise I was, they did not want me and I was bought up knowing that, they were also very old for their years and had very little knowledge of modern times. We never did gel or get very close, unlike the older siblings who were favoured.
 
OP
OP
dellzeqq

dellzeqq

pre-talced and mighty
Location
SW2
well, it's been an iteresting read - for which many thanks.

My view is that circumstances alter cases. Stuart is a particularly youthful 60 - think James Dean, but getting on a bit, and a lot taller. He's spent his entire life just living for himself, living an Epicurean existence (although I'm sure he's done stuff that Epicurus never dreamt of), living on a houseboat, swanning off to odd corners of the globe, dashing off some art work to pay the bills from time to time, and it was no real surprise that he eventually 'settled down' with a woman who is considerably younger than he is. On the other hand...he shouldn't have been surprised when she got pregnant - but, apparently, he was. He's even more surprised by the discipline that having a baby around is imposing on his life. So.........we are all pretty amused. Actually we're cackling (inwardly) like loons, watching him check that she's not crawled up the stairs for the hundredth time.

He's actually a bit grumpy, and that's not like Stuart. But, hey, we've all done the maths and, like it or not, he knows that this is his life. As in the rest of it.

By chance I went round to see another Stuart, one from these very boards, last night. Come nine o'clock, daughter knocks on the door and asks for a lift - something that's a very regular event in our house. I reckon the first Stuart is going to have to come to some other arrangement with his new firstborn.

I think this new addition to the family will have a wonderful, wonderful childhood. Her parents are financially secure, and (staircrawling notwithstanding) pretty relaxed about life. But the kid is on a timetable. She's going to have to grow up and take stock of her own life in a bit of a hurry. My thought, though, is that having a dad who'd getting on a bit, who's seen a lot of life, might better equip her to do this.
 

Flying_Monkey

Recyclist
Location
Odawa
My first thought was that he will never get to be a grandparent, but then being a grandparent isn't what it was in most cases anyway. He probably knows more than enough to be an amazing dad, and although there is more risk of him not living to see her grow up, he certainly has an incentive to stay as fit and healthy as possible into his old age now.
 

bicyclos

Part time Anorak
Location
West Yorkshire
No chance of me settling down in my 20s and 30s. Too busy thrashing motorcycles around the Isle of Man,rock climbing, cave dwelling,skydiving and getting wrecked. Ive settled down now though, young-un came along at 40. I don't think it matters really at what age you have children for me at 40yrs it was right...my daughter is 12 now, time flies.
 

Globalti

Legendary Member
A school friend of my father was a theological advisor to the Vatican until he wrote book proposing that Catholic priests should be allowed to marry. He was chucked out and he became the RC chaplain to the university of Cambridge then a parish priest and then at the age of 60 he left the priesthood and married a woman aged 30. They have two sons now at Cambridge and Oxford. He is an extraordinary man.
 
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