So, once it got to extra time I turned the sound down on the laptop and fired up a game on the main pc. I could see it was still 1-1.
Then it got to penalties. About then I reckoned it was about time to go to the pub, what with the only team we had ever beaten in a shootout already exited.
During the journey I heard various shouts due to open windows but it wasn't conclusive.
Once I was in the pub, people didn't seem overly exited and although I couldn't hear the words on the tv, the tone also didn't seem exited. The England players were hugging each other but didn't seem very happy.
I assumed normal service had been resumed.
But then, I noticed that the tv wasn't showing the Colombia players. And finally I saw Southgate smiling when he hugged someone. So a quick look on the internet confirmed that we had in fact, won.
A few thoughts:
After seeing England's tactics at corners and looking up "love train" on urban dictionary, I am now significantly more suspicious of Glen Hoddle.
How have we got so far without any recognisable attack? We've scored one goal from open play and it was from a midfielder.
I still don't know what Jordan Henderson does but Klopp keeps picking him so it's probably just me.
Given what's happened so far, it's entirely conceivable that Belgium and Brazil somehow manage to eliminate each other in some sort of freak result.