How to increase speed

[ayceejay]

From time to time here we get a question about going faster - well I think I found the answer.
Riding this morning in the sunshine and with only a comparatively light wind to deal with I was going well when suddenly I heard a noise I didn't recognize, it was like heavy panting and I kind of clip clop sound. It did occur to me at a certain point to look over my shoulder and what do I see? Two huge dogs bounding along mouths agape and level, one either side of my back wheel. Well, Mark Cavendish eat your heart out I outran those suckers and when I next looked around they were sitting in the road their humungous tongues hanging out to one side.
So this is my idea, to turn this near tragedy into a business opportunity. I want to get two big dogs and offer training sessions to aspiring cyclist who want to go faster. I will charge a nominal fee payable upfront (just in case the dogs catch you) and I thought of a catchy name too - Cujo Coaching or CC for short.
Your thoughts?

 

[ScotiaLass]

Will you supplying clean shorts as well? If so, I may be interested....

 

[ayceejay]

Will you supplying clean shorts as well? If so, I may be interested....

You've made me think of another opportunity SL what about Cujo Colostomy's ?

 

[MikeG]

Dogs? Just dogs?

How come Africans aren't the best cyclists in the world, then?

 

[AndyRM]

Dogs? Just dogs?

How come Africans aren't the best cyclists in the world, then?

There's a Kenyan fella who's pretty good...

 

[DefBref]

American Flyers - Training with Eddie

Cheesy as , but I love this film.

 

[Cold]

I was chased by a Duck while out recently at first I was laughing at it then realised that it was serious so had to speed up, maybe you could use different types of animals for different types of cyclists.

 

[Mo1959]

I was chased by a Duck while out recently at first I was laughing at it then realised that it was serious so had to speed up, maybe you could use different types of animals for different types of cyclists.

What a great idea. I think I could just about get away from a tortoise.
I did actually have to put a spurt on a few weeks ago as a white German shepherd appeared out of a cottage and gave chase. I actually turned and looked at it and gave it my most authoritative and fierce command to feck off and then pedalled away as quickly as I could.

 

[screenman]

I have a easier way to go faster, put a second magnet on your wheel.

 

[LimeBurn]

American Flyers - Training with Eddie

Cheesy as , but I love this film.

One of my all time fave cheese films. Especially the bit where he does a wheelie while racing the horse.

 

[Pat "5mph"]

I was chased by a Duck while out recently at first I was laughing at it then realised that it was serious so had to speed up, maybe you could use different types of animals for different types of cyclists.

I volunteer to test the business model: not scared of dogs, mice would do the trick