I blame strava lol

[Sim2003]

Bit of a moody one this and purely just putting it up to see if any others can relate.

So I got into cycling last year (as a hobby) and enjoy the getting out and seeing wildlife, lovely buildings, bit of scenery and just doing something other than sitting in watching TV or playing my games.

I get out regularly and have a cycling partner that also joins up with me regular too. We were going out and purely doing a steady paced ride 10-12 mph and doing 30-40 miles. I can do 15-20 mph np on the flats but hills destroy me. Even did a Stratford (65miles)day ride that was great and proper proud of myself for it.

Only now she has found Strava so her head is now where its all about speed and beating her previous time on segments on a 23mile loop we do. So we start off together and she shoots off. Stops at the mid point and waits for me then its off again and meets at the end. My speed has improved from when I first started cycling but I'm quite comfortable at doing 11-13 mph for my longer rides even though I can do 14-17mph on my commute

Now fair play to her she does regular running and uses her trainer at home, eats well etc and has now clearly improved beyond my fitness level. I am a fair bit younger than her. However I probably have near 10st in weight and my bike is a tourer with MTB gearing (Yep I'm gonna blame the bike too lol) I also eat rubbish and enjoy my gaming .

Only thing is she says she doesn't want to lose her Tuesday cycling partner. This is where my dilemma lies as I'm quite happy going out on my own at my own pace (this is how it all started). But feeling like i have to push and push is just killing the enjoyment for me. I get my kicks from my gaming not the speedy cycling.

Feel bad if I have to stop riding out with her as I think we helped each other in getting where we are.

Cheers for reading if you did , Just wondering if anyone else has been in the same or similar situation and how you went about it.

 

[Dave 123]

You've got to do it for yourself.
If you start to hate it, you won't do it.

If you'd like company at an easier pace look at joining your local CTC.

 

[Kajjal]

I just let slower riders set a speed they are comfortable with. My wife is a fair bit slower than me and i just see riding with her as a social thing not for training or beating strava records. Only on steep down hills do i shoot off and wait at the bottom for her to catch up.

 

[rugby bloke]

Its your ride, don't feel under any pressure to keep up or ride at a speed outside of your comfort zone. At the end of the day it is meant to be fun !

 

[ianrauk]

As what others have said... time to find and so your own thing. Find others who are happy cycling at YOUR pace. If she doesn't want to lose you as her riding partner then she will have to sacrifice the Strava chasing.

 

[Mugshot]

Aye, as above is about the size of it. I'm faster than my regular ride buddy, I know it, he knows it, it doesn't need proving every time we're out. If I'm out with him I'll ride with him and if I want to push myself I'll do it on my own. I'd tell her to get knotted.

 

[Sim2003]

As what others have said... time to find and so your own thing. Find others who are happy cycling at YOUR pace. If she doesn't want to lose you as her riding partner then she will have to sacrifice the Strava chasing.

This is exactly it. I already do plenty of riding on my own detouring to and from work , little visits to family, late night rides etc. I'm happy at the pace i go. Just with her stating not wanting to lose my as a cycling partner seems bizarre when its her changing the ride style.

 

[jefmcg]

Can she handicap herself in some way? Load up a pannier with books, get a fixie or single speed, pull out the old mountain bike with knobby tires?

Alternatively, can you vary the route so she's not racing against herself? If you are covering new territory, that should reduce her need for PRs.

But yes, it sounds like you are no longer well matched as riding buddies. Bummer

 

[Smokin Joe]

Maybe if you "Prepared" properly beforehand? I know this doctor....

 

[Moodyman]

Maybe if you "Prepared" properly beforehand?

Like letting a bit of air out her tyres?

 

[steve50]

I would suggest you let your cycling partner down gently explaining to her that you are out to enjoy your cycling at a pace you are comfortable with and if she wants to continue to improve her pr's etc then you should cycle your separate ways. She is the one who doesn't want to lose her cycling partner but she is the one who is willing to cycle off into the distance without a second thought for you, the upshot is, if you are no longer enjoying cycling with your friend then it is time to go your own way.

 

[Pale Rider]

I wonder if your buddy wants the riding together to come to an end, but wants you to be the one to end it.

Women (not that I'm any expert) can have a strange way of trying to get what they want.

 

[Dirk]

http://www.velominati.com/the-rules/

Bit of a moody one this and purely just putting it up to see if any others can relate.

So I got into cycling last year (as a hobby) and enjoy the getting out and seeing wildlife, lovely buildings, bit of scenery and just doing something other than sitting in watching TV or playing my games.

I get out regularly and have a cycling partner that also joins up with me regular too. We were going out and purely doing a steady paced ride 10-12 mph and doing 30-40 miles. I can do 15-20 mph np on the flats but hills destroy me. Even did a Stratford (65miles)day ride that was great and proper proud of myself for it.

Only now she has found Strava so her head is now where its all about speed and beating her previous time on segments on a 23mile loop we do. So we start off together and she shoots off. Stops at the mid point and waits for me then its off again and meets at the end. My speed has improved from when I first started cycling but I'm quite comfortable at doing 11-13 mph for my longer rides even though I can do 14-17mph on my commute

Now fair play to her she does regular running and uses her trainer at home, eats well etc and has now clearly improved beyond my fitness level. I am a fair bit younger than her. However I probably have near 10st in weight and my bike is a tourer with MTB gearing (Yep I'm gonna blame the bike too lol) I also eat rubbish and enjoy my gaming .

Only thing is she says she doesn't want to lose her Tuesday cycling partner. This is where my dilemma lies as I'm quite happy going out on my own at my own pace (this is how it all started). But feeling like i have to push and push is just killing the enjoyment for me. I get my kicks from my gaming not the speedy cycling.

Feel bad if I have to stop riding out with her as I think we helped each other in getting where we are.

Cheers for reading if you did , Just wondering if anyone else has been in the same or similar situation and how you went about it.

Rule#5

 

[summerdays]

Just cycle at the pace you are happy with, if you are continually having to push to keep up with the speed she wants to go, you are not going to be enjoying it. Tell her to switch off Strava for those rides or to do a double loop and pick you up on the second loop if she wants to ride with you.

I use Strava, but I'm not driven by it and I would prefer to slow down and be social with mates especially one friend who is convinced I get upset with having to go slower and won't ride with me.... We have agreed to do a gentle couple of mostly downhill miles to the pub in the summer, and arrange to have his car at the pub so he doesn't have to cycle back! I honestly don't mind going slower. Or if I'm with Mr Summerdays who goes up hills faster, I just send him up the hill ahead of me, he either waits at the top or comes back down again to do the hill again.

 

[steveindenmark]

I would suggest you drop her like a stone

Upping the pace is one thing. Belting all the way, all the time, just to beat strava segments is another. What will she do when she cannot improve anymore?

I wouldnt enjoy it and if I dont enjoy it, whats the point.

Have a Word with her while your having coffee and cake and let her make the decision. Either she slows to your pace or she rides by herself.