In search of a calmer me.

[Jon George]

To crudely sum up my personality in a line or two: throughout my adult life I have always stood up to bullies - it's mostly what drives my political beliefs and, even though people tell me I occasionally exude a 'dangerous' demeanour, I actually try to avoid physical confrontation, because I prefer dry underwear.
My interest in cycling over the last three years has certainly reduced my stress levels, but there is one particular type of motorist that is still sure to fire me up: the individuals who, upon seeing me coming the other way on a single track road, will move over to take all the road and rush at me. I had one this morning on a notoriously bad stretch between Ipswich and Felixstowe, where this harassment happens quite frequently. So, what did I do? I jinxed in front of him and he returned the manoeuvre in an exceptionally dangerous game of chicken.
For obvious reasons, I would appreciate some advice on how to reduce the probability of me reacting to such behaviour in this way in the future. Just more cycling - until the slight-shake-of-the-head-and-oh-hum-there's-another-dick becomes second-nature? Or do I just accept that if I can't change, then the least I can do is change my route?

 

[Dragonwight]

Whatever you do don't shake your head , I had this Saturday just gone i just looked at this guy who I had just cut me up and he went mental, told me to **** off followed me when the lights changed stood on his horn, revved his engine called me an Ef***** W****** and then proceeded to try to push me off the road. And the whole time i didn't say a word or do anything except report him to the police when i got back. I quite surprised myself how calm I was.

 

[Arjimlad]

I'll block cars coming from behind on narrow roads, and pull over to let them through here and there, but if a bully insists on forcing his way past me from in front, there's not much to do

I sometimes have to get into the hedge when some part of me usually ends up in some sort of contact with the wing mirror. A sarcastic forelock-tug or even bow, or hand clap has been seen from time to time as well. These types usually drive out of a perfectly safe passing space rather than wait 3 seconds for me to get past safely.

If they want to get twisted knickers and get all shouty I can generally respond or simply ride off. The road is too narrow for them to turn around and chase after me and there are plenty of points where I can divert away from the road. These bullies won't leave their precious safety cages, as a rule.

Yesterday evening, I had just cause to carry a soft rounders bat in my hand on one such road and waving it about did have an interesting effect upon motorists.

 

[Jon George]

[QUOTE 3146573, member: 45"]I really don't believe than anyone except the diagnosed psycho would be physically able to drive through you.[/QUOTE]

True enough, but I've done enough drinking in rough pubs over the years to know that there are a damned sight more of them about (mostly undiagnosed), than the general public might care to think about.

 

[TwoWheelRay]

I am new to cycling,but I only ride traffic free Sustrans routes,canal paths or forest trails etc as I am terrified to cycle on the roads in this country. And this from a guy who has ridden motorbikes for nearly 30 years!

 

[Dayvo]

Just smile and wave - .

But that isn't actually a 'hello' wave...!

 

[Mike J]

I'd say it could depend how serious ur anger issues are? Would you say they are uncontrollable at times? If so it might be worth looking into some anger management courses or therapy. Responding angrily can often escalate a situation an usually means you've lost control. Of course I am only talking from my own experiences and they may not be relevant to your own.

 

[dan_bo]

Just friggin lamp the daffodil he wont do it again!

jokin.

 

[shouldbeinbed]

@User has it spot on. Calmly clearly and clinically go about your business. Show those around you that you know what you are doing and are not going to be put off by their childish antics. Apart from a very rare real head case who would do you no matter what, bullies are all p**s and wind.

 

[Jon George]

I'd say it could depend how serious ur anger issues are? Would you say they are uncontrollable at times? If so it might be worth looking into some anger management courses or therapy. Responding angrily can often escalate a situation an usually means you've lost control. Of course I am only talking from my own experiences and they may not be relevant to your own.

I completely understand where you're coming from with this and am aware that a lot of anger issues stem from life not going the way a person wishes it to, but I believe my grievance goes to a more subtle fundamental level of not liking people pushing me around. I'm tempted to experiment with riding primary where possible on this stretch, but, as I belatedly recall mentioning elsewhere on this forum some time ago, the appalling frequency of nutters on this piece of road who have absolute hate in their eyes as they approach me at speed necessitates some degree of caution. But I'll work it out.

 

[MikeG]

I found a very much calmer me by the liberal use of the Ignore function on this 'ere forum

 

[Jon George]

I found a very much calmer me by the liberal use of the Ignore function on this 'ere forum

Big laughs! Tah, muchly!

 

[Ganymede]

I am new to cycling,but I only ride traffic free Sustrans routes,canal paths or forest trails etc as I am terrified to cycle on the roads in this country. And this from a guy who has ridden motorbikes for nearly 30 years!

Slightly off-topic, but I've just read this and thought of it immediately on reading your post: http://www.theguardian.com/lifeands...-city-cycling-for-beginners-can-a-course-help

 

[Shut Up Legs]

Yesterday evening, I had just cause to carry a soft rounders bat in my hand on one such road and waving it about did have an interesting effect upon motorists. View attachment 48536

That just reminded me of one of those Russian road-rage videos I saw last year I think: after a near-miss, one of the cars came to a stop in front of the other, then the front car's driver got out of the car, armed with an axe!

 

[Hip Priest]

Keeping calm is the best advice on the roads. I try to, but we're all human and I do lose my temper on occasion. When you set on a ride, just try to cultivate a calm demeanour, then if something does happen, you can usually keep your cool, rather than the rage coming upon you by surprise.

If you don't enjoy confrontation - and most of us don't - then road rage is best avoided.