Living alone

[Fnaar]

I'm the sort of person who sometimes needs time to myself. Days when I can have it are as rare as hen's teeth, but maybe once every year I'll get a whole weekend entirely to myself, and I love it. However, I know from the experience of others that I'm lucky not to have solitude forced upon me by chance/circumstance, and I'm grateful for that.
However... I don't think I've ever felt lonely or bored... it's just not a feeling I'd entertain... there's far too many things to keep me interested.

However #2: left to my own devices, I'm clean, neat and tidy, (and I can cook well, do the washing and ironing etc; basically, I'm pretty much perfect )... but living with Mrs F and the kids, the house is a right tip. I've just got used to it!!!

 

[hopless500]

Yes I know, he needs to return to "normal" to be able to start afresh. I actually bumped into him, in said budgie smugglers, on his bike, wearing nothing else, just those and sandals, as he was going to sunbathe in the park, via the towpath, a busy towpath. As he approached I was thinking "WTF! Is this guy naked or what?", before I recognised him. When a person thinks this is normal behaviour, it's a long road back.

Think maybe you should've said something......

 

[theclaud]

[QUOTE 2763982, member: 9609"]Could women be their own worst enemy when it comes to doing jobs around the house with bizarre standards of what needs to be done. I have seen my wife hover an entirely clean carpet then say to me, why couldn't you have done that. Baths don't need to be washed out, it happens automatically when you have one. clothes that have only been worn once or twice do not need laundered. And then there is the complete madness of 'the ironing'.... underwear does not need to be ironed, or towels or dusters or bed sheets or pillow cases or socks. In fact the vast amount of stuff that gets ironed, didn't even need washed in the first place. It does seem to me that men get into trouble for not doing jobs that didn't need doing.[/quote]

There speaks someone who has never been round my house...

I'm not talking about a difference in standards - I'm talking about basic shared tasks and responsibilities, and either cleaning up after yourself or contributing to the shared workload elsewhere in a way that is proportionate to the demands you make on others. Having more relaxed standards of cleanliness or tidiness that others doesn't mean that you miraculously don't use plates, pots and pans when you eat, use up food and drink, generate waste etc. Bins get full up, pans and plates run out, there is no milk or tea bags or loo roll or whatever, the recycling eventually fills the entire house. There is no magic fairy that does this stuff. I'm afraid the stuff about men "getting into trouble" is laughable - what effective redress is there for someone whose flatmates or partner will not share domestic responsibilities?

 

[ColinJ]

what effective redress is there for someone whose flatmates or partner will not share domestic responsibilities?

Replacement partner or flatmates?

Either that, or start charging them at £50/hour for the time you spend doing their share of the work!

 

[Aperitif]

There speaks someone who has never been round my house...

I'm not talking about a difference in standards - I'm talking about basic shared tasks and responsibilities, and either cleaning up after yourself or contributing to the shared workload elsewhere in a way that is proportionate to the demands you make on others. Having more relaxed standards of cleanliness or tidiness that others doesn't mean that you miraculously don't use plates, pots and pans when you eat, use up food and drink, generate waste etc. Bins get full up, pans and plates run out, there is no milk or tea bags or loo roll or whatever, the recycling eventually fills the entire house. There is no magic fairy that does this stuff. I'm afraid the stuff about men "getting into trouble" is laughable - what effective redress is there for someone whose flatmates or partner will not share domestic responsibilities?

Big hug, Claudine ...There, something you can't do without sharing!
Like Fnaar, I'm perfect.

 

[fimm]

I lived alone for about 8 years, on and off, in my 20s and early 30s. I liked lots of aspects about living alone. Now I live with my boyfriend. He too had lived on his own for a time before he met me. It is nice to have someone to share with. I think some of the cleaning jobs get done more frequently since he moved in, and maybe some less frequently. He & I have different ideas of what's important to be done, perhaps! The rule is (usually) whoever cooked, the other person washes up. I used to iron all sorts of things. These days it is just the shirts/tops I need for work. He hardly ever wears a shirt, and if he does, I iron it, because he doesn't like ironing and I quite like doing it. He does most of the bike maintainance stuff because he likes doing that (but I'm responsible for my Brompton). I do most of the getting stuff down from high places because I am taller than he is!

I joke that my mother would disown me if she found out I was ironing my boyfriend's shirts for him. She is the youngest of four children. She has three older brothers. Her mother fairly rapidly got mum doing as much of the ironing as she could... my Dad does his own ironing now... Mum tells me that when she first got married she felt that she had to do the whole "perfect housewife" thing and have dinner on the table the moment Dad came in from work and so on; but, when she started training and then working she realised that she couldn't (or, more accurately, didn't HAVE to) do everything, and Dad and we children had to do more round the house.

 

[ttcycle]

I live alone apart from a pesky cat. Generally, I like my own company and enjoy it. The only time it becomes an issue is like @coffeejo mentioned when I'm not very well as even the smallest daily things become quite hard to accomplish. The choice of being able to socialise or have people around is really important, as is the need for personal space and time, wouldn't change it for anything.

 

[MontyVeda]

the best thing about living alone is not getting earache for swigging milk straight from the bottle.

 

[wanda2010]

I could never live alone. I'm too short. I need someone who can reach the top cupboards of the kitchen. It would be chaos otherwise.

Stepladder? Footstool? Works for me. I've been known to climb onto the kitchen worktops to clean the top of the wall cupboards. Could do with someone then. Oh and someone to clean/maintain my bikes . Alone but not lonely .

 

[welsh dragon]

Stepladder? Footstool? Works for me. I've been known to climb onto the kitchen worktops to clean the top of the wall cupboards. Could do with someone then. Oh and someone to clean/maintain my bikes . Alone but not lonely .

I am always being told off for doing that. I used to be told off for using a knife from the cuttlery drawer to open a plug to change a fuse or to put a plug on a new appliance

 

[wanda2010]

@welsh dragon - That's how we did the electrical stuff when my siblings (5) and I lived at home. Screwdrivers arrived late to the party .

I love it when the family get together at each other's but I really love my own space having had to share with 4 brothers, a sister and beloved first nephew, growing up. Have you ever had to handwash for 5 people as a teen? To this day I hate ironing.

 

[theclaud]

Big hug, Claudine ...There, something you can't do without sharing!
Like Fnaar, I'm perfect.

Luckily the useless flatmates are history. I am currently keeping my house in a mildly disgusting condition because my landlord has put it on the market. See Bastard Landlord threads passim.

 

[Archie_tect]

Luckily the useless flatmates are history....

Patio?

 

[deptfordmarmoset]

@welsh dragon - That's how we did the electrical stuff when my siblings (5) and I lived at home. Screwdrivers arrived late to the party .

I love it when the family get together at each other's but I really love my own space having had to share with 4 brothers, a sister and beloved first nephew, growing up. Have you ever had to handwash for 5 people as a teen? To this day I hate ironing.

We had a rota between 3 boys: one washed, the others dried. These days I only wash up when there's a big enough pile or the work surfaces have disappeared. And drying is something that happens naturally without having to transfer the water to a cloth which then needs to dry out.

 

[MontyVeda]

OI STOP THAT NOW, IT'S DISGUSTING.

saves on washing up though.... handful of cornflakes, gob full of milk... breakfast done and dusted with not even a spoon to rinse.