Mate got hit by car, mrs not keen on me cycling anymore...

[sleuthey]

My wife was the opposite. She encouraged me to get back on the road fearing the longer I left it the more scared I would get. To answer your questions in the same order:

Just do it. Tell your wife if you don't then you will make your environmental contribution by joining extinction rebellion.

Find a quieter route and I would personally wear a helmet.

Don't, leave it up to him, if it happens again you will feel part responsible.

 

[Fiona R]

Hi everyone

I’m relatively new to road cycling, been cycling for about 6 months and absolutely love it, regardless of the weather, as long as I have the right clothing for it.

Now recently I got my mate into cycling who hasn‘t cycled for over a year and he started to really enjoy riding with me. Last Sunday was only his 3rd ride with me and he tagged along with me from Solihull to Coventry (I had work that day). I couldn’t believe my eyes when I crossed the roundabout safely but looked back to see that the same driver who had given me way had not seen my mate behind me and ran over his back wheel. Anyways, there was me and another 2 cyclists that saw everything, and the taxi driver who ran him over also came out and admitted he didnt see the cyclist. My mate ended up with a fractured wrist and has had to take a break from driving and work for 4-6 weeks. He is going through the drivers insurance company etc.

I was absolutely shocked on Sunday and felt very upset. Didnt feel like cycling anymore. Also, when I got home I had to tell the Mrs everything as she would have found out anyway. She is now saying she doesnt want me to cycle anymore...

What would everyone’s advice be in this situation so that I can quickly and safely get back onto the road again... also, any advice I could give to my friend so that I can encourage him to cycle with me again once he‘s fully recovered?

My husband came home last night and said colleague was off work again who has had lots of back ops, he was doing ok but was rammed in a car accident on his way home on Friday night, bad whiplash, poor guy is back to square one I should imagine. Accidents can happen any time. Slipping and falling on stairs, burning yourself, chopping fingers cooking. Most dangerous place of all is bed, that’s where most people die.

 

[Dogtrousers]

Perhaps rein it back in for a bit. Choose quieter routes. Send regular messages home.

When I decided to give up cycle commuting into London and to revert to the train my wife admitted to me that she absolutely hated me doing it and was mightily relieved.

Last injury in our household was my wife sprained her ankle taking the bins out. Which reminds me, it's bin day tomorrow. Maybe I should ... nah.

 

[tom73]

Have you explained what cycling means to you ?
Was she fully supportive before you started cycling?
l'd let the dust settle guess it’s a understandable reaction.
Even though Mrs 73 cycles she still worriers about me when i'm out. Though mostly in case she need's to contact me.
So we have 2 "rules" if you like she can find my location Via my Apple Watch and / or my bike gps and 2 I always take my phone.

As for your mate 1st nice work to get him into cycling I've been trying with my mate but no go. A shame really we'd have a great time for sure.
Find a gentle route with little traffic and take things slowly as other have said. You could see if British Cycling have any rides in your area they are mostly laidback and let you ride in group with no need to join a club. Plus the routes are checked and have someone leading them.
It maybe a way to help ease things over with the mrs until things settle down too.

 

[mjr]

Most dangerous place of all is bed, that’s where most people die.

This. There are far bigger dangers than the motorists you can see which will probably pass much closer to you if you stop cycling: heart attacks, cancer, stroke, depression and many more. Do whatever you need to get moving again and to explain to yourself and your family why it's better than being inactive. The risk of being hit by a car is obvious, noticeable and often overestimated - the opposite of being hit by an inactivity-related illness.

Some people say you could always go to the gym instead or swim or whatever. Yes, that's correct, you could. But stats suggest most people don't find time for that and even fewer stick at it. If you can, well done, but I'd rather be cycling! It's the logical choice!

 

[Deleted member 26715]

Not victim blaming & we shouldn't have to do it, but make sure you wear bright clothing, even ride with your lights on in the day, although being hit from the side in this instance may not have helped, but had your mate had a flashing front light the dozy driver may have been jolted into attention.

 

[mjr]

[...] and I would personally wear a helmet.

The mate broke his wrist and those things aren't intended for multivehicle collisions so can we please leave them out of it and in https://www.cyclechat.net/threads/the-cyclechat-helmet-debate-thread.187059/ where they belong!

 

[mjr]

Not victim blaming & we shouldn't have to do it, but make sure you wear bright clothing, even ride with your lights on in the day, although being hit from the side in this instance may not have helped, but had your mate had a flashing front light the dozy driver may have been jolted into attention.

Seems unlikely. The driver probably didn't look properly and breaking up a human outline with a bike light or hi-viz dazzle camo is unlikely to aid correct recognition by such a driver. And starting a post "not victim-blaming" doesn't make it so.

 

[Deleted member 26715]

And starting a post "not victim-blaming" doesn't make it so.

What that I am or that we do need to take measures that we shouldn't

 

[BrumJim]

This. There are far bigger dangers than the motorists you can see which will probably pass much closer to you if you stop cycling: heart attacks, cancer, stroke, depression and many more. Do whatever you need to get moving again and to explain to yourself and your family why it's better than being inactive. The risk of being hit by a car is obvious, noticeable and often overestimated - the opposite of being hit by an inactivity-related illness.

Definitely this one. As humans we are much better at seeing the immediate danger than the long term one. I don't know how to explain to someone that you would much rather take the risks on the road than put your health in danger. Although my wife understands the immediate danger of me not cycling, which, through the endorphins cold-turkey is a severe case of grumpiness.

 

[derrick]

Not victim blaming & we shouldn't have to do it, but make sure you wear bright clothing, even ride with your lights on in the day, although being hit from the side in this instance may not have helped, but had your mate had a flashing front light the dozy driver may have been jolted into attention.

That is the biggest load of bullshit, My wife was lit up like a christmas tree when she got hit by a car, the driver was on the phone, if they aint looking it does not matter what you wear.

 

[confusedcyclist]

What would everyone’s advice be in this situation so that I can quickly and safely get back onto the road again... also, any advice I could give to my friend so that I can encourage him to cycle with me again once he‘s fully recovered?

Sadly, when you put yourself out there on our roads, there's only so much you can do to protect yourself. No amount of careful riding is going to protect you from idiots behind the wheel who do the unexpected. There are a lot of them. Some will actively bully vulnerable road users, other's make honest mistakes, where are all human after all. Sadly though, most incidents could be avoided and only occur because motorists become complacent and take unnecessary risks, e.g. closes passes. They have less skin in the game than a cyclist, and won't be hurt in a collision with one, so they tend to be less mindful than cyclists. Safety equipment like airbags and belts and steel cages actually discourage safer driving, because they compensate for failing to anticipating certain risks which would be unacceptable to two wheel counterparts.

Still, when you look at the risk of being killed or seriously injured, statistically speaking, you are far better off cycling than leading a sedentary lifestyle. Still, that's really no consolation to the unlucky few or families of those killed or seriously injured. The more time you spend in the saddle, the greater the risk of injury. Despite cycling being less safe relative to some other modes of transport, at an absolute level, it is, nevertheless, a safe way of travelling and serious accidents are rare. In 2013 there was roughly 1 KSI casualty per 1 million miles cycled and 1 KSI casualty per roughly 100,000 hours of cycling.

However, when you remove the idiots from the picture, i.e. cycling at night, whilst drunk, on the pavement or the wrong way down the street, the picture improves somewhat. I have personally been hit by two cars (never with injury) and had many more scary near misses, more than I care to count, very rarely would my road position have helped me. Having said that, I've had many near misses in the car, but it hasn't stopped me getting behind the wheel, why should it stop me on a bicycle?

 

[roubaixtuesday]

The more time you spend in the saddle, the greater the risk of injury.

But you lessen your risk of lifestyle illnesses by much more.

 

[Deleted member 26715]

That is the biggest load of bullshit, My wife was lit up like a christmas tree when she got hit by a car, the driver was on the phone, if they aint looking it does not matter what you wear.

Each to their own view, but if you are wearing bright clothes & have a flashing front light despite your indignation there is more chance they will see you. Sadly some will not no matter what you do.

 

[mjr]

Each to their own view, but if you are wearing bright clothes & have a flashing front light despite your indignation there is more chance they will see you. Sadly some will not no matter what you do.

There's almost no evidence for the first bit in the real world (dazzle camo is still camo), repeating such myths discourages cycling and the last bit is a much bigger problem. Please don't exploit this collision to push them.