Sadly I have a solution for this. Getting the condensation on your beer or wine
1. Get married
2. Have kids
3. Sink all your future earnings into a house
4. Somehow buy a fridge
5. Wait until kids are tall enough to leave the fridge door not quite closed all day
6. Put beer in fridge
7. Go out
8. Come back
And hey presto! You have beer cans with condensation on it and a fridge full of food that must be cooked immediately or thrown away!