more useless than the wasp?

[dellzeqq]

I've seen you post some tripe but that takes the biscuit.

Or are you having a joke?

bc

joke at my expense I imagine. Talking of which.......

accountants and solicitors!

 

[beancounter]

joke at my expense I imagine. Talking of which.......

accountants!

fair enough.

architects!

bc

 

[theclaud]

Landlords
Austrian blinds
Hob-nobs
Netball

 

[dellzeqq]

Landlords
Austrian blinds
Hob-nobs
Netball

Ahem! (You can put that down in the Dulwich College list of things that might come in handy at a later date)

And netball? I adore netball - it's so much clevererer than basketball.

 

[theclaud]

Ahem! (You can put that down in the Dulwich College list of things that might come in handy at a later date)

And netball? I adore netball - it's so much clevererer than basketball.

This one was just a lucky strike.

It may well be cleverer, but it's still shite. My guess is that you were not obliged to play it at school.

 

[dellzeqq]

It may well be cleverer, but it's still shite. My guess is that you were not obliged to play it at school.

true enough.

 

[theclaud]

Swimming pools
Shredless marmalade
Espadrilles

 

[theclaud]

In a distinct improvement on Barry Manilow's 'Mandy', which stayed in my head for yesterday's ride home, this thread has suddenly put me in mind of Allen Sherman's '12 Days of Christmas' - a hymn to useless gifts:

An automatic vegetable slicer that works when you see it on television
But not when you get it home
A chromium combination manicure, scissors and cigarette lighter
A pair of teakwood showercloths
An indoor plastic birdbath
A pink satin pillow that said "San Diego" with fringe all around it
A hammered aluminum nutcracker
A statue of a lady with a clock where her stomach ought to be
A simulated alligator wallet
A calendar book with the name of my insurance man
Green polka dot pajamas
AND A JAPANESE TRANSISTOR RADIO

 

[mr Mag00]

windows vista

 

[User169]

Same old Hampstead
Ken Hom Wok Set
Dead Sea bath salts
Jog-proof iPod
Iron Age hill fort
Long term roadworks
High tide bird watch
B&Q Homebase

 

[User169]

I know what you mean - they are terribly engaging creatures. Have you seen the film Old Boy?

No, but before I order it, is there any octopusrelated beastliness in it?

 

[theclaud]

No, but before I order it, is there any octopusrelated beastliness in it?

Is there?!

It's a great fillum, but brace yourself.

 

[swee'pea99]

And from Tom waits:

That's right, it filets, it chops
It dices, slices, never stops
Lasts a lifetime, mows your lawn
And it mows your lawn
And it picks up the kids from school
It gets rid of unwanted facial hair
It gets rid of embarrassing age spots
It delivers a pizza
And it lengthens, and it strengthens
And it finds that slipper that's been at large
Under the chaise longe for several weeks
And it plays a mean Rhythm Master
It makes excuses for unwanted lipstick on your collar
And it's only a dollar, step right up
It's only a dollar, step right up

'Cause it forges your signature.
If not completely satisfied
Mail back unused portion of product
For complete refund of price of purchase
Step right up
Please allow thirty days for delivery
Don't be fooled by cheap imitations
You can live in it, live in it
Laugh in it, love in it
Swim in it, sleep in it
Live in it, swim in it
Laugh in it, love in it
Removes embarrassing stains from contour sheets
That's right
And it entertains visiting relatives
It turns a sandwich into a banquet
Tired of being the life of the party?
Change your shorts
Change your life
Change your life
Change into a nine-year-old Hindu boy
Get rid of your wife
And it walks your dog, and it doubles on sax
Doubles on sax, you can jump back Jack
See you later alligator
See you later alligator
And it steals your car
It gets rid of your gambling debts, it quits smoking
It's a friend, and it's a companion
And it's the only product you will ever need
Follow these easy assembly instructions
It never needs ironing
Well it takes weights off hips, bust
Thighs, chin, midriff
Gives you dandruff, and it finds you a job
It is a job
And it strips the phone company free
Take ten for five exchange
And it gives you denture breath
And you know it's a friend, and it's a companion
And it gets rid of your traveler's checks
It's new, it's improved, it's old-fashioned
Well it takes care of business
Never needs winding
Never needs winding
Never needs winding
Gets rid of blackheads, the heartbreak of psoriasis
Christ, you don't know the meaning of heartbreak, buddy
C'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon
'Cause it's effective, it's defective
It creates household odors
It disinfects, it sanitizes for your protection
It gives you an erection
It wins the election
Why put up with painful corns any longer?

"The large print giveth and the small print taketh away."

 

[wafflycat]

The steel ones are a blend of craftsmanship, refinement and style. The others are AN Other bike. Except much more expensive.

(Plus I'm getting Dell back for nominating steel bikes and OS maps).

Early 200s, there were some Colnagos that, to look at, were works of art just as much as lovely bicycles. Then the paint jobbies went a bit bland.

 

[dellzeqq]

I'm surprised nobody has mentioned........

estate agents. Has the downturn in the housing market rendered them human?

and, not before time, PLAYSTATION!!!