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Fab Foodie

hanging-on in quiet desperation ...
Location
Kirton, Devon.
How’s it going @Speicher ?
Any updates?
:hugs:
 

deptfordmarmoset

Full time tea drinker
Location
Armonmy Way
@Speicher . My sympathies. I've just spent a few days with my mother and this caring business is exhausting work.

In other news, someone with landfill for brains has filled up my bin while I was away. I'm pretty certain I know which cretin did it but I'm not going through their waste to get proof....
 

potsy

Rambler
Location
My Armchair
@Speicher . My sympathies. I've just spent a few days with my mother and this caring business is exhausting work.

In other news, someone with landfill for brains has filled up my bin while I was away. I'm pretty certain I know which cretin did it but I'm not going through their waste to get proof....
Dump it all in their garden after dark? :whistle:
 

Speicher

Vice Admiral
Moderator
@Speicher . My sympathies. I've just spent a few days with my mother and this caring business is exhausting work.

She has been very frail and needing lots of help for fifteen years now. Sadly she does not recognise that there is only so much I can do. She has demanded that I do more and more. She has also told me that my two Brother's are unable to help, and gave me a list of reasons why. I found out some time ago, that she had not even asked them to help. She asks me for advice, and then does something completely different, then argues with me and tells me I do not know what I am talking about.

Over the past fifteen years I have gone well over the "call of duty" and well beyond that, to the detriment of my own mental and physical health. Now I now where my boundaries are. I held Power of Attorney for her, but passed that responsibility to the Brother who is about two years older than me.

The Brother who is visiting her this weekend has health problems of his own. I cannot remember the last time he saw her, probably three years ago.
 
D

Deleted member 1258

Guest
She has been very frail and needing lots of help for fifteen years now. Sadly she does not recognise that there is only so much I can do. She has demanded that I do more and more. She has also told me that my two Brother's are unable to help, and gave me a list of reasons why. I found out some time ago, that she had not even asked them to help. She asks me for advice, and then does something completely different, then argues with me and tells me I do not know what I am talking about.

Over the past fifteen years I have gone well over the "call of duty" and well beyond that, to the detriment of my own mental and physical health. Now I now where my boundaries are. I held Power of Attorney for her, but passed that responsibility to the Brother who is about two years older than me.

The Brother who is visiting her this weekend has health problems of his own. I cannot remember the last time he saw her, probably three years ago.

:hugs:
 

deptfordmarmoset

Full time tea drinker
Location
Armonmy Way
She has been very frail and needing lots of help for fifteen years now. Sadly she does not recognise that there is only so much I can do. She has demanded that I do more and more. She has also told me that my two Brother's are unable to help, and gave me a list of reasons why. I found out some time ago, that she had not even asked them to help. She asks me for advice, and then does something completely different, then argues with me and tells me I do not know what I am talking about.

Over the past fifteen years I have gone well over the "call of duty" and well beyond that, to the detriment of my own mental and physical health. Now I now where my boundaries are. I held Power of Attorney for her, but passed that responsibility to the Brother who is about two years older than me.

The Brother who is visiting her this weekend has health problems of his own. I cannot remember the last time he saw her, probably three years ago.
That bit about asking for advice and then doing something completely different is ringing very loud bells for me...even though mine's not as cantankerous as yours, merely advanced level contrary.
 

Speicher

Vice Admiral
Moderator
When my father died (in 2001) my mother put excessive pressure on me to help her, and do everything while my two brothers were not involved at all. Furthermore, when she thought I was sad (?) that my father had died, she gave me more things that "had to be done that minute or yesterday" When that strategy, surprise surprise, did not work, she piled even more on my plate.

I know that her generation would usually think "keep busy" but surely not "keep overloading someone until they are mentally and physically exhausted".

While my brother is there this weekend, depending on the weather (he lives in Newcastle upon Tyne), I am staying well clear. He has not spoken to me for about three years, while I have made numerous attempts at building bridges, without success.

I know that peeps on here cannot do anything to help, but knowing that others have been through a similar scenario does help a bit.
 
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