OK.... time to 'fess up to your most cringeworthy moment(s)

[steveindenmark]

In 1991 I was in a motorbike accident which broke both my arms. My arms were put in splints and so I needed help in the hospital to go to the toilet. I was taken by a male nurse who sat me down to do the business and then cleared off. A few minutes later a female voice asked if I was ready. The nurse came in and while she was wiping my arxe. She said "You dont recognise me do you"? She went on to explain that she was a year below me in school and had a crush on me all through school. At that moment I wished I had died in that accident😁 As it turned out she became a good mate and can still embarass me.

 

[Nigeyy]

Surely everyone has a list of these? Off the top of my head, the first one I can think of involves my poor education....

When I was a young teenager, I had a huuuge crush on a girl, and I think it's true to say she was extremely attractive. I'd made various excuses to successfully walk with her as she walked home from school. Fortunately it was on my way home, and regardless of the fact I had a bicycle and could have cycled home in a fraction of the time, I weebled my way in to walking and talking with her (which, as a rather insecure teenager is pretty good). This went on for quite a time, and true to my social ineptness, I just couldn't work out what to do or how to take the "next step" of attempting to form a relationship....

So, one day, I made my mind up. "Simple" I thought. "I'll just come out with it!". So just as we were about to reach her home, I managed to blurt out in awkwardteenagese a stammering "I really like you". She stopped, turned towards me, and our eyes locked together. Looking directly into my eyes with her deep blue eyes, she then shook her tousled blonde curly hair, and purred back the unforgettable words of "the feeling is mutual".

Now, at this point, you'd think things were going pretty well. And they should have been, except for one thing: I had no idea what the word "mutual" meant. I was a bit puzzled, and it was then my brain made the very worst deduction it could possibly ever make in my teenagehood: it equated the word "mutual" with the word "mutant" thus forming a perfect cringeworthy moment. "Oh" I said, feeling very crestfallen and rejected. I said "OK then", and promptly hopped on my bike and cycled off as quickly as I could. I never walked with her after that.

Eventually I did bother to use a dictionary and was devastated (trust me as male teenager I was really absolutely devastated) to find out what "mutual" meant (I blame Comprehensive school education). But by then, I was too embarrassed. Looking back on it now, I do chuckle and wonder what the heck she thought of me. Perhaps taking "playing hard to get" a bit too far? On the positive side, I've never, ever forgotten the meaning of the word "mutual". Ever.

 

[ColinJ]

So, one day, I made my mind up. "Simple" I thought. "I'll just come out with it!". So just as we were about to reach her home, I managed to blurt out in awkwardteenagese a stammering "I really like you". She stopped, turned towards me, and our eyes locked together. Looking directly into my eyes with her deep blue eyes, she then shook her tousled blonde curly hair, and purred back the unforgettable words of "the feeling is mutual".

Now, at this point, you'd think things were going pretty well. And they should have been, except for one thing: I had no idea what the word "mutual" meant. I was a bit puzzled, and it was then my brain made the very worst deduction it could possibly ever make in my teenagehood: it equated the word "mutual" with the word "mutant" thus forming a perfect cringeworthy moment. "Oh" I said, feeling very crestfallen and rejected. I said "OK then", and promptly hopped on my bike and cycled off as quickly as I could. I never walked with her after that.

That is quite sad, but also funny!

 

[wheresthetorch]

That is quite sad, but also funny!

Yes, I gave it a 'laughing' emoji, but with the best of intentions.

 

[Nigeyy]

Oh no, while it was sad at the time, I have long long ago got over that and can completely laugh about it. I'm hoping this was definitely taken as a humourous cringeworthy teenager story, not a sad one!

 

[ColinJ]

Oh no, while it was sad at the time, I have long long ago got over that and can completely laugh about it. I'm hoping this was definitely taken as a humourous cringeworthy teenager story, not a sad one!

I'm thinking of the poor girl - there she was thinking that the gorgeous boy really fancied her, but when given the green light he just rode off laughing at her - oh, the humiliation...!

 

[gbb]

17, went to my then GFs parents one Saturday, her dad used to go to the pub before dinner, i went along, we had a few beers, maybe one too many, walked back home....to a great big oily fish and chip dinner

I got half way through it, felt myself go green, left the table pronto, ran to the loo, never made it and puked all over her mums carpet

Oh God, the house was like a show room, mum extraordinarily tidy. She does'nt hold it against me although i still cringe at that.

 

[gbb]

Surely everyone has a list of these? Off the top of my head, the first one I can think of involves my poor education....

When I was a young teenager, I had a huuuge crush on a girl, and I think it's true to say she was extremely attractive. I'd made various excuses to successfully walk with her as she walked home from school. Fortunately it was on my way home, and regardless of the fact I had a bicycle and could have cycled home in a fraction of the time, I weebled my way in to walking and talking with her (which, as a rather insecure teenager is pretty good). This went on for quite a time, and true to my social ineptness, I just couldn't work out what to do or how to take the "next step" of attempting to form a relationship....

So, one day, I made my mind up. "Simple" I thought. "I'll just come out with it!". So just as we were about to reach her home, I managed to blurt out in awkwardteenagese a stammering "I really like you". She stopped, turned towards me, and our eyes locked together. Looking directly into my eyes with her deep blue eyes, she then shook her tousled blonde curly hair, and purred back the unforgettable words of "the feeling is mutual".

Now, at this point, you'd think things were going pretty well. And they should have been, except for one thing: I had no idea what the word "mutual" meant. I was a bit puzzled, and it was then my brain made the very worst deduction it could possibly ever make in my teenagehood: it equated the word "mutual" with the word "mutant" thus forming a perfect cringeworthy moment. "Oh" I said, feeling very crestfallen and rejected. I said "OK then", and promptly hopped on my bike and cycled off as quickly as I could. I never walked with her after that.

Eventually I did bother to use a dictionary and was devastated (trust me as male teenager I was really absolutely devastated) to find out what "mutual" meant (I blame Comprehensive school education). But by then, I was too embarrassed. Looking back on it now, I do chuckle and wonder what the heck she thought of me. Perhaps taking "playing hard to get" a bit too far? On the positive side, I've never, ever forgotten the meaning of the word "mutual". Ever.

Awesome story

 

[neil_merseyside]

When I was a teenager I went on holiday with my parents to the Baggy Point Hotel in Croyde Bay.

One morning, lying in bed having just woken up, I let a little fart out.

Unbeknown to me, I’d caught a rather virulent stomach bug and shat the bed. Badly.

Badly? Seems to me you can't actually do it well...

 

[mustang1]

I never ever want to think about my most cringoest moment. Ever. EVER.

 

[Tenacious Sloth]

Badly? Seems to me you can't actually do it well...

Well actually, now you come to mention it. I did make a pretty good job of it.

 

[Dec66]

I'm kind of relieved that this thread is relatively tame, so far. I imagine, given the numbers of people and breadth of experience on this forum, that we could get into very darkly entertaining depths, very quickly.

In fact, I could probably do so single-handedly. But I'm not going to. (insert smiley-type thing here)

 

[ColinJ]

Well actually, now you come to mention it. I did make a pretty good job of it.

A real 'Trainspotting' moment!

 

[PaulB]

I promise this wasn't me but I felt the shame of this poor chap for the whole day...before I saw him again in the evening!

We were on a very bumpy flight from Leeds to Aberdeen on a violently windy day. The take-off was horrible but once we achieved cruising height, it settled down. But of course, we had to come in to land. It was a small 17-seat plane and I'd chosen the last seat at the back but there was a pull-out seat behind me used by the crew member and behind that was the plane's toilet. As we began to descend, the buffeting became bad and was getting worse. The guy in the seat immediately in front of me stood up but the stewardess behind me told him to seat down as the pilot had already told us to buckle up. The look on his face was one of absolute horror..and then we understood why. He was obviously trying to reach the toilet and the entire cabin was filled with the unmistakable Dame Judy of his fear as it filled up his undergarments! We were all scared but he couldn't control his fears the same way the rest of us could.

I told the girls in our office and every one of them called me to ask for more lurid details.

That evening, I caught the return flight and the same guy was on it but a clothing shop in Aberdeen had come to his rescue and he was sporting different slacks . We'd landed at 7.30 am though so he'd had some time to kill and a taxi driver to negotiate taking him to deal with in the meantime.

 

[Dave7]

I promise this wasn't me but I felt the shame of this poor chap for the whole day...before I saw him again in the evening!

We were on a very bumpy flight from Leeds to Aberdeen on a violently windy day. The take-off was horrible but once we achieved cruising height, it settled down. But of course, we had to come in to land. It was a small 17-seat plane and I'd chosen the last seat at the back but there was a pull-out seat behind me used by the crew member and behind that was the plane's toilet. As we began to descend, the buffeting became bad and was getting worse. The guy in the seat immediately in front of me stood up but the stewardess behind me told him to seat down as the pilot had already told us to buckle up. The look on his face was one of absolute horror..and then we understood why. He was obviously trying to reach the toilet and the entire cabin was filled with the unmistakable Dame Judy of his fear as it filled up his undergarments! We were all scared but he couldn't control his fears the same way the rest of us could.

I told the girls in our office and every one of them called me to ask for more lurid details.

That evening, I caught the return flight and the same guy was on it but a clothing shop in Aberdeen had come to his rescue and he was sporting different slacks . We'd landed at 7.30 am though so he'd had some time to kill and a taxi driver to negotiate taking him to deal with in the meantime.

A company conference. Free drinks the night before so some seriously bad heads and bad stomaches.
10.00 break, there was a group of us talking when one smiled, shifted his leg and farted. The look on his face as he followed through was priceless, as was the speed he turned and legged it back to his room.
He re-appeared an hour later. Different clothes and was very quiet.