Ridiculous cycling products

[Drago]

Ebikes

 

[CanucksTraveller]

The Rixen and Kaul map holder.
For those tours when you absolutely, positively need to look like you're a budding cabbie doing the knowledge.

 

[a.twiddler]

I'll kick off with this gem, which blows air into you face as you're riding along. Presumably for cyclists who can't exceed walking pace.

View attachment 527424

https://pranela.com/products/portable-neck-fan™

Just what I need! Could strap it to the bars with one of my numerous spare inner tubes!

 

[raleighnut]

Ebikes

Oi !

 

[a.twiddler]

View attachment 527436

The Rixen and Kaul map holder.
For those tours when you absolutely, positively need to look like you're a budding cabbie doing the knowledge.

For when you need an air brake down those long downhills (after you've cooled yourself on the way up with the neck fan). Or if you think you aren't going slowly enough into that headwind.

 

[ColinJ]

Drivers who overtake too close are a menace so the assault rifle is an acceptable deterrent but I reckon that blowing vehicles off the road with the missile launcher is perhaps taking self-defence too far...?

 

[Electric_Andy]

Rucksack covers. Why? And rucksacks suck on a bike.

I found mine very useful. Illuminous yellow with reflective material, and kept my rucksack dry on wet commutes

 

[MontyVeda]

Derailleurs are normally unaffected by small side impacts. This device ensures that you cannot access the small sprockets after such an incident because it has bent into the parallelogram. So one takes it off and throws it away. Easier not to fit it in the first place.

View attachment 527433

not only did they look sh!t, they only served an imaginary purpose.

 

[Tenacious Sloth]

the tool for tools...

View attachment 527431

I’m always amazed by the number of people who don't rate these as, in conjunction with Morgan Blue chain cleaner, mine has been making my chains look brand new for the past five years.

Of course, you need to ensure that you turn the right-hand pedal anti-clockwise) as indicated in the instructions). If not, it won’t do a good job and dirty oil/cleaner will spray everywhere.

But you’d have to be a Tool to use a tool without reading the instruction first, wouldn’t you?

 

[wafter]

Rucksack covers. Why? And rucksacks suck on a bike.

Granted large, heavy, non-breathable rucksacks suck, however small breatheable ones are great for carrying tools, additional clothing and the odd collection - such as:

Not when you collect a dozen eggs from the farm shop and incorporate a ride.

Also, this:

I found mine very useful. Illuminous yellow with reflective material, and kept my rucksack dry on wet commutes

 

[matticus]

polystyrene anti-concussion devices.

 

[MontyVeda]

I’m always amazed by the number of people who don't rate these as, in conjunction with Morgan Blue chain cleaner, mine has been making my chains look brand new for the past five years.

Of course, you need to ensure that you turn the right-hand pedal anti-clockwise) as indicated in the instructions). If not, it won’t do a good job and dirty oil/cleaner will spray everywhere.

But you’d have to be a Tool to use a tool without reading the instruction first, wouldn’t you?

A wise man once told me that instructions are just 'their opinion of how something works'

 

[matticus]

Instructions are rarely written by the inventors/engineers, so he could have a point!

 

[roley poley]

Flint catchers ??

 

[JPBoothy]

Instructions are rarely written by the inventors/engineers, so he could have a point!

Have you noticed that a lot of instructions no longer have any writing at all, only diagrams