Rules for Public Transport

[purplepolly]

If you're going on a long journey always go to the loo beforehand because the toilets will either be:-

1. occupied the entire journey by fare dodgers
or 2. in such a state that you really wouldn't want to go in there


Any passenger who coughs or sneezes and doesn't cover their mouth will be shot on spot.

 

[ianrauk]

Hackbike, do you stop the train either a foot further on or back to pee of those that stand in the same spot on the platform every day.

That is so common and if the doors are not released within one nanosecond watch the passengers panic and run down the train.

 

[ianrauk]

Make sure all the windows are shut.. I mean.. who wants fresh air on a train journey?

 

[ColinJ]

....

2 As the train stops at the platform, please call your partner who is stood on the other side of the door to let them know that you are just arriving at the station.

....

How about what I experienced recently?

• "The train is at Hebden Bridge station"
• "Okay, we're leaving Hebden Bridge"
• "We're coming into Halifax"
• "No, I'm still at Halifax station"
• "We've only just left Halifax!"
• "Yeah, just coming into Bradford Interchange"
• "Nah, still at Bradford!"
• ""We're leaving Bradford"
• "We've just left New Pudsey"
• "We're coming into Bramley"
• "Just left Bramley"
• "Coming into Leeds"
• "No, the signals are on red"
• "The signals are still on red"
• "We're not moving so I think the signals are on red"
• "We've started moving again so I don't think the signals are on red any more"
• "We're coming into Leeds"
• "I can see the platform"
• "Okay, the train has stopped and the doors are opening"

I thought I'd heard the last of this ongoing sequence of short conversations, but as the woman walked down the platform...

• "I've got off the train"
• "No, I'm still on the platform!"
• "Look, it's a long platform!"
• "I'm on the escalator"
• "I can see you!"
• "No, over on your left - coooeeee!"

All of these were separate calls!

 

[Lazy-Commuter]

How about what I experienced recently?

• "The train is at Hebden Bridge station"
• ...
• "No, over on your left - coooeeee!"

All of these were separate calls!

Wouldn't it be easier / cheaper to just get a GPS tracking system so that the concerned 3rd party could just monitor that?

 

[John the Monkey]

...
Same for brompton owners!

Interesting - the members of this group I see on my trains fold the bike without prompting, at every opportunity, and look crestfallen when the bike spaces on the train aren't filled...

 

[al78]

Having used trains for a number of jouneys recently, I can summarise ticketing rules as follows:

A ticket purchased for off peak travel at a station offering such tckets is valid subject to the ticketing rules as as advertised and only as advertised. Any ticket issued outside of this condition is valid only on condition that it is valid at time other than so specified by the rules. The rules are subject to variation as and when specified by the general ticketing rules published and available at the times specified at stations authorised to issue such tickets, and then only as permitted by the general carriage of passengers regulations as laid down by the company or companies which are, for the time being parties to these rules.

A ticket purchased specifically for travel between specified stations and/or times is only valid when and if the company issuing the said ticket is a party to the above agreement concerning the issuing of such tickets. However, if a ticket is purchased in advance, then there can be no guarantee that the aforementioned ticket will or could be valid for a specified journey at any time between the hours of 0800-0759 Monday to Sunday inclusive.

Anyone found travelling with a ticket issued otherwise than in accordance with these rules will be assumed to have read and understood the above, and wil be assumed to be guilty of fare avoidance and be prosecuted accordingly.

Is that clear?

What happens if someone with an advance ticket is delayed and misses their connection as a result?

 

[ColinJ]

Wouldn't it be easier / cheaper to just get a GPS tracking system so that the concerned 3rd party could just monitor that?

(In case it wasn't obvious, it wasn't me on the phone, it was a woman sitting in front of me, and later walking in front of me at Leeds station.)

I think it would be much easier if people just forgot this modern concept of everybody needing to know where everybody else is and what they are doing at all times!

My mobile phone is switched off 99% of the time or only used as an alarm clock, the main exception being when people are meeting me for one of my CycleChat forum rides and somebody might need to let me know that they are late or not coming after all.

 

[Arch]

How about what I experienced recently?

• "The train is at Hebden Bridge station"
• ...
• "I've got off the train"
• "No, I'm still on the platform!"
• "Look, it's a long platform!"
• "I'm on the escalator"
• "I can see you!"
• "No, over on your left - coooeeee!"

All of these were separate calls!

Excellent. My sister and I sometimes used to to play a game where the one of us not travelling would ring the one who was and say "Where are you?", in an attempt to trick them into saying "I'm on the train...."

Bollo, a bit OT, but those new ticket barriers are Winchester are awful. I stood there for about 15 minutes with Sis and Bro-in-law and Oli, waiting for my train, and the chap minding the 'automatic' gates had to open the little box of tricks to open them manually several times - once for a lady who'd gone through and then, not unreasonably, if a little unorganisedly, decided she had time to come back through and get a coffee - but it wouldn't open again for her ticket.

Also, I had to say my goodbyes on that side of the barrier and then dash through when my train was arriving, and Oli didn't have nearly such a good view of the train. And now they can't go down and just stand on the platform to watch the trains pass. I hate ticket barriers at stations. You always get stuck behind someone whose ticket doesn't work, or whose suitcase gets wedged in the gates. If the train companies can't police their trains properly, that's their problem.

Still the upside is that most train drivers seem to like the bevy of small boys being lifted up to wave to them from the bridge over the tracks, and wave and hoot in greeting.

 

[Speicher]

If you want to get off the train quickly, and you and your time are so important that you rudely shove me out of the way to get in front of me, and immediately stand by the door, do not be surprised when

a) the door opens inwards and you risk being squished

when you leap off the train and then stop in your tracks just in front of the doors, so that you can look where you are going - Do Not swear at the person (me) behind you when they nearly topple on top of you because they were not expecting you to stop so suddenly after you appeared to be so important and in such a rush. If I am carrying a rucksack and a suitcase, being squished by me will not be a pleasant experience.

c) Note that instruction B also applies to you, yes you, at the top and the bottom of escalator, and when getting out of the lift.

d) This far west in the country of Englandshire we behave with decorum, but if our patience is tested, beyond reasonable limits, we are likely to lose our composure. This something you do not wish to encounter.

 

[Bollo]

Interesting - the members of this group I see on my trains fold the bike without prompting, at every opportunity, and look crestfallen when the bike spaces on the train aren't filled...

I see plenty of bromptonites (bromptonauts?) and they always fold, but there was one lady bromptoneer who used to place her folded bike across the three wheel-holders in the bike spaces, leaving them all unusable. Not terribly keen on moving it either when asked.

 

[purplepolly]

If you want to get off the train quickly, and you and your time are so important that you rudely shove me out of the way to get in front of me, and immediately stand by the door, do not be surprised when

a) the door opens inwards and you risk being squished

a) i) the conductor can't get out of his cabin to unlock the doors and everyone is delayed because you have to get out of his way and more people have arrived to queue behind me so there isn't much room. This of course is the reason why I left the gap in the first place.

 

[Speicher]

Thank you PurplePolly for that added clarification.

 

[John the Monkey]

I see plenty of bromptonites (bromptonauts?) .

I like "Bromptoneer".

Gives them the flavour of heroes from Saturday morning serials, I think.

Bromptonites is a bit too politically charged, and Bromptonauts too redolent of space exploration.

 

[Gerry Attrick]

What happens if someone with an advance ticket is delayed and misses their connection as a result?

The rules state:

"Persons travelling on a ticket purchased in advance should bear in mind that the such purchase is subject to the rules and regulations specified above and in no way entitle such passenger or passengers to maintain, claim, expect or bear legal entitlement to the rights and/or debarments specified in appendix 3b (c) to these rules. If such passenger or passengers so claim, maintain or otherwise lay title to such rights, then all such rights will be disregarded and abandoned with no recourse to appeal. Furthermore, any passenger or passengers seeking rights of appeal will immediately be required to give up all rights or debarments as and when requested to do so by an authorised member of the transport staff. Staff will have the ultimate right of veto and no deferment or refusal will be accepted or acknowedged as legitimate. If any expected, promised, anticipated or timed connection is missed, then the company cannot be held responsible for the failings of the passenger or passengers. In no case can the company be held liable, responsible or in any way at fault."


So you see the rules are pefectly clear to anyone. Thank you.