The Christmas cracker joke thread

[Piemaster]

Has to be done. so from the office xmas party:

What do you call fear of giants?





Fi-fi-phobium

 

[biggs682]

dont know , please tell all

 

[Doseone]

I used to have a racing snail, but he wasn't very good. I took his shell off to see if it would make him go any faster, but all it did was make him more sluggish.

 

[Lisa21]

What do you get if you cross santa with donald duck?



christmas quackers......

 

[Tim Hall]

The best one ever:

Why do elephants drink?


To forget.

 

[snorri]

The punchline I heard today was "Deep pan crisp and even", but I didn't here the question. Can anyone suggest a good one?

 

[Speicher]

How does Good King Wenceslas like his Pizza?

 

[Cubist]

Panto gag tonight

"I used to work as the matchmaker in a chicken factory, the pay wasn't brilliant, but I was just about making 'ens meet."

 

[snorri]

How does Good King Wenceslas like his Pizza?

Thank you Speicher...Merry Christmas

 

[byegad]

What do you call a fly with no wings?

 

[byegad]

A walk.

 

[byegad]

What do you call a fly with no wings and no legs?

 

[byegad]

It doesn't matter. it'll never come.

 

[postman]

Just waiting for the In laws to arrive.So a quick one.

What prize do door knocker salesmen win.

Wait for it -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------The No-bell peace prize.

 

[postman]

The punchline I heard today was "Deep pan crisp and even", but I didn't here the question. Can anyone suggest a good one?

What pizza would Good King Wenslas order.