the recovery

[byegad]

Picture this dear reader.

A bony leg is picked up in your headlights, you slowly look up, past the rolled up long-johns to a hairy pullover which has lumps, wisps of grass and a few earthworms sticking out of it. As your gaze travels up you come across a goatee beard and then the full wonder horror of the SBGG's fizog!

Without concious thought your foot plants down hard on the throttle and the car accelerates away leaving you shocked and wondering if that last mince-pie was laced with LSD.

 

[n-ick]

More satisfying to select reverse letting the hiker hobble towards you then keep accelerating . With correct steering this manoeuvre should achieve satisfying terminal impact , as approved in the "Vovo driver's guide to the highway".

 

[byegad]

Terribly ungenerous young* Sir**!

*When I say young it is not really accurate. More oldish.
** Sorry Cur, pronounced sir.


Edit...

Forgot to mention, I got an honour in the NY list. I'm now ahem!

Lord Byegad of Yorkshire is now Earl Byegad of all the bits Dave C and his cronies doesn't care about. (The north of England from Enfield to the Scottish borders.)

Be assured that I will still insult the plebs, even those not in uniform!

 

[Scoosh]

Methought it is a tad 'Not On' to mention that one is the recipient of a further Honour, Yer Honour Yerearlship.

 

[byegad]

One needs to inform lesser beings so they get the name on the cheques right for Mr Coutt, ones personal bankers. (They have a vault that makes the one in Harry Potter look modern!) Apart from that the lower classes offer an Earl almost indefinite credit, this should ensure we (The extended family.) spend no money for the next 100 years. After 200 or so years of not spending anything we are beginning to really get the hang of it!




You can all replace your headgear and get off your knees now. Just back slowly away from the computer tugging your forelocks and bowing slightly.

 

[Scoosh]

You can all replace your headgear and get off your knees now. Just back slowly away from the computer tugging your forelocks and bowing slightly.

My 'headgear' is still firmly fixed to my head and only the lovely Leslie ever removes any of it (for a very modest sum, I can assure you)

At my age , getting off my knees is only slightly more hazardous/ difficult/ impossible than getting onto them; my fo'lock has rarely been tugged and I have too few strings left to bow anything - slightly or stockily.

What is this "the computer" thing of which you write ? /

 

[byegad]

Oh dear a revolt already. And from North of the Border too!

Expect the Redcoats any time soon.

 

[Scoosh]

Expect the Redcoats any time soon.

Well, you've been trying for long enough .... what makes you think the result will be any different this time ??

 

[Scoosh]

Me'earlship

 

[byegad]

Careful or we won't let you have your independence!

 

[n-ick]

Happy new year to all our readers and groupies. Here's hoping that we can survive another 12months of inane postings and that the God like monopod puts in an appearance or even a finale.
Hopefully he will standing in queues for us again. We can never forget his efforts at leading a group ride, when stopping at the first junction, I spectalively asked if we were all here , to be asked "how many did we start with?"

 

[byegad]

Well said Nick.

The SBGG is no doubt underwater in darkest West Yorkshire, IF Royal Mail* manage to get him home for New Year!

*I should be careful what I say, they might find out where I live. With a map and someone to show then the way!

 

[Scoosh]

Careful or we won't let you have your independence!

I sincerely hope we are not that daft !

Have a Wonderful 2013, everyone in this nut-house neck of the CC woods and may all your bits (personal, domestic and cyclical) remain attached where you intend them so to be.

GWS SBGG !

 

[byegad]

On a serious note, for once. I know where you are coming from. From a NE English point of view, I'd vote for Scottish independence now. Maybe then Whitehall would find out there were parts of the country North of Watford Gap that are English.

 

[n-ick]

Tha's have to create an autonomous island state of Rawmarsh , to contain and stop the spread of the SSGG.

We are composing a compendium of the Master's wisdom:
"See how fast I can corner".......followed by man and machine crashing through a hedge.
"Are we there yet?".......followed by "where ?".
"Follow me, only I know the way"........followed by disappearing.
"Trust me, there are no hills"........oh yeh.
"I'm the only sane lard person lard here".