Worlds worst dad jokes.

[Dogtrousers]

Where does a monkey cook his sausages?

Under the gorilla

 

[lenfield]

What do you call a wealthy Arab who owns a chain of fish & chip shops?
Sultan Vinegar.

 

[Wixsteman]

If you have 10 cows in a field then coo eight is closest to Iraq

 

[gbb]

Bit of a long one.
A dishevelled cowboy came running into town, frantically calling out 'Big Jakes a'comin'
The people wail and run around in panic 'big Jakes a'comin' can be heard all over town.
Shutters slam shut, doors are locked, people flee in the other direction crying 'BIG JAKES A'COMIN'

Half an hour later, this man mountain comes trudging up the road i to town, carrying his horse on his back like its nothing....
He walks into the bar....the barman stutters, terrifed..
'W, w,w, what can I getcha ?'
'Whiskey, triple' boomed the.man mountain.
Shaking the barkeep pours the drink, man mountain swigs it in one go, 'AGAIN' , booms man mountain and swills it in one go.
'W w w want another ?' stutters the hapless barkeep ....

Man mountain looks up....⁰'Nah, ain't got time...big Jakes a'comin.....'

 

[berty bassett]

What do you get if you cross an irate sheep with an angry cow ?
An animal in a baaaaaaaaad moooooooed

 

[lenfield]

Don't throw sodium chloride at people.
It's a salt.

 

[Ming the Merciless]

What do bees do if they need transport?
Wait at the buzz stop.

 

[lenfield]

What do bees do if they need transport?
Wait at the buzz stop.

Only in Birmingham!

 

[Beebo]

Delivering an ant to your country from abroad is important

 

[Ming the Merciless]

What’s ET short for?
He’s only got little legs.

 

[Ming the Merciless]

I have a few jokes about unemployed people, but none of them work.

 

[Ming the Merciless]

A fish swam into a concrete wall, Dam!

 

[Red17]

A fish swam into a concrete wall, Dam!

What do you call a fish with no eyes?

A fsh

 

[berty bassett]

What do you call a Spanish flasher

Senor Willy

 

[berty bassett]

What do you call 2 men hanging from a window ?
Kirt n Rod