Your worst injury !!!

[redcogs]

At 16, on Honda 90 collided with oncoming Bedford.

Big bang - sensation of flight - further big bang..

Tried to stand up and get back on Honda, but am being pinned down by some buggers leg across my chest and shoulder. Quickly realised its my leg, which was almost severed just above right knee. Bleeding like stuck pig. The bike 'kick start' went through the right ankle. It hurt after about ten minutes.. Discovered right elbow fractured eventually. Pelvis fractured. Bollox placed dent in petrol tank! The plus was that for about a week each one was literally the size of a Mango!

Surgeons managed to retain the leg, but required treatment was pretty tough, skin grafts, gangrene above knee necessitated cutting away of decayed muscle each morning, not in theatre, but whilst fully conscious. Don't want it to happen again!

 

[TheDoctor]

Slipped getting out of the bath and dislocated my shoulder.
Painful doesn't even begin to cover it. Called my g/f but she heard nothing as the Daleks and Cybermen were getting stuck into each other on the TV and it was a bit noisy. 3 hours, 2 cylinders of NOx and a some morphine later I'm in A+E whimpering like a small girl as my shoulder refuses to go back in. I'm told I was whimpering - I don't actually remember, for which I'm somewhat grateful.
Eventually went back in under a general the following morning. I would not recommend this as a means of relaxation, and would in fact prefer to be repeatedly kicked in the nads for 15 minutes or so.

 

[SamNichols]

1) Aged 10, whilst playing wicket keeper in a playground cricket game, I was hit, full force, in the face with a cricket bat. It bled for nearly a day, and broke my nose (on the plus side, it did get me the rest of the day off school).

2) Aged 13, whilst riding my bike home from school, I didn't properly look when coming out of an alley. Cue being hit by a local driver, getting sent down the road. Luckily all that happened was that most of the skin came off my leg and I was bruised. Could have been worse.

3) Aged 10 or so, whilst playing a game where you have to get the bean bag, in a head to head with Keith Machell: we both went literally went head to head and knocked each other unconscious for about a minute. Got sent home again, woo!

4) My classic of recent years (18 months ago): whilst walking down Gandy Street, Exeter, in the rain and quite sober, I slipped up on a particularly slippy cobble. The bouncers at the gay bar opposite start wetting themselves as I go arse over. Their laughter, however, diminishes when my housemate yells: 'What was that tearing noise?'. Turns out that tearing noise was the noise of one of my ankle muscles completely tearing. Got it checked by Doctor, who advises a course of physio to rebuild it. helpfully, I ignore him and let it 'heal itself', it doesn't. I can't run at all without a horrendous twinge making me want to curl up and die. If the Dr says: 'physio' then trust them, as you never know quite how an injury shall affect you. Does make you more careful in the rain though.

 

[ChrisKH]

Fractured and dislocated left shoulder whilst playing rugby. Having a blinder when two fat f*&%k-faced forwards from the opposition jumped on my back and my shoulder joint was inverted (not the way it is mean to go). Pain when it happened and when the surgeon put it back in its socket was, well, painfull (to say the least). I found I could swear in Swahili.

 

[Elmer Fudd]

Aged 14, Barbara Muir,
She broke my heart.

 

[Dayvo]

Aged 14, Barbara Muir,
She broke my heart.

Not this one, surely!

http://www.jst.go.jp/po_seminar/h16semi/pdf/semi3/cv/cv_02.pdf

She could break a few mirrors!

 

[Elmer Fudd]

Not this one, surely!

http://www.jst.go.jp/po_seminar/h16semi/pdf/semi3/cv/cv_02.pdf

She could break a few mirrors!

Definitely not that one, she could break my will to live, never mind my heart !!!

 

[TVC]

As previously mentioned at length:

T-boned a car whilst doing getting on for 25mph. Initial impact of left hand with car door leaving fractures. Then I headbutted the roof breaking my nose, shattering two front teeth which punched a hole in my top lip. The bike impacted my back leaving a fine collection of black bruises, then I cleared the car landing on my shoulder causing a posterior dislocation and a fractured humerus. Finally I slid across the concrete road surface using my face and knees as brakes.

This girl once gave me a chinese burn in junior school - that stung a bit as well.

 

[got-to-get-fit]

i was 9 yr old and playing on a tarzan swing over a river ....launched myself off the swing and into the river, i wasnt wearing any trainers ...just bare feet. I hit the water and planted my right foot on the river bed and my left foot on a broken bottle. I went white and i can still remember the feeling of blood draining from my face it was as if the world had just fell out of my ass. I staggered to the river bank and out into the arms of my horrified mum. She with the help of a few other pic'nicers wrapped my foot in a beach towel, the blood just soaked straight through....4 towels later and blood was still drenching through....i was rushed to hospital and several stitches later was discharged....didnt walk for 2 week and have never been on a tarzan swing since.

The water in the river was like a scene from jaws....bright red...amazing!

 

[stevenb]

My worst injury was getting knocked of my bike doing my paper round when I was 14.
I fractured my ankle and sustained heavy bruising to my face and legs.
By the time I'd gone back to school the old chinese whispers had gotten about and that I had been on a life support machine.

 

[Johnny Thin]

(Some years ago) Exotic beach...nookie with gf ... aaaaarrrrgh! Pain
Torn frenulum ... required surgery and stitches

I've done that - I thought it was called your 'virgin string' or something? It's still hanging off!

Anyhow - chicks dig scars, lucky you!

 

[Elmer Fudd]

When I was working in Cork a gang of us went down to Schull for the long October bank holiday weekend, my mates girlfriends Dad worked at the Jamesons distillery where he would , ahem, borrow bottles of neat vodka which he would then dilute down but it would be a hell of a lot stronger than anything you could buy.
After a heavy Saturday night some dozy twat, i.e. me, fell out of bed naked and ended up with third degree burns to my right buttock off the night heater.
Standing joke was that I'd got 'Dimple' on me arse and the girlfriend had an 'x' on her nose !

One of the girls even bought me some Pampers !!

 

[KitsuneAndy]

Fell off my bike going down a very steep hill when I lived back up in Northumberland and somehow managed to bite through my bottom lip, just under the actual lip. Blood everywhere, not fun.

 

[SamNichols]

Oooh, i forgot this one. Guys this will make you cringe. Used to stay at a campsite near Bexhill (used to be an annual church trip), there was a play area on site, with a helter skelter type slide. Being the little tykes that we were, we used to play various games on said slide, such as climbing up it etc. On this particular afternoon we were playing a game where some of us stood on the lip of the slide, so that people slid under your legs in a sort of tunnel. Upon my go at the standing on the edge section I lost my footing, I was standing at the top of the slide, so must have been 10 feet up. I fell off the side of the slide and fell about 6 ft. Unfortunately, I didn't hit the ground, but instead landed on the supporting cross bar of the frame of the slide - I landed astride the bar. I threw up almost immediately, spent the rest of the afternnon, couldn't walk for a week, and the man bits were black and blue for over a month. Brings a little tear to the eye thinking about it.

 

[papercorn2000]

A year ago I was hit by a car on a country lane. Cycling down a hill towards a right hander with a pal. Doing the normal thing where you move into single file on a bend except I was the one on the outside and while I was trying to get onto the back I became aware of the noise of a hard revving engine and a speeding hatchback. Next thing I know I'm lying in my bed and someone's trying to wake me up, except its not my bed and I'm actually still in the road.

Long and the short of it I have no recollection of any of it except being put into an ambulance and taken to hospital. Various procedures later I was told I had a caved in ribcage and punctured lung. A few days later they told me I had also snapped the ligaments that hold your shoulder together. Another couple of days after that I was told that I had a major infection. Ended up being hospital for two weeks before they would let me out. After I got out saw Professor Pennington on telly (talking about hospital acquired MRSA infection) saying that normally if a Staph Aureus infection gets in your lung you have a 50% chance of survival except that in the case of MRSA...well)

Outcome?, twat (17 year old driving his mum's car) says that it was all my fault for riding in the middle of the road. So his insurance won't pay up and it will probably all go to court. Means that my legal represention (thank goodness that I had British Cycling membership) have had to get medical notes etc. Turns out I had MRSA infection in lung. God know's what chances Prof Pennington would have given me?

I'm assuming that the guy was charged. May not be as bad seeing that your companion also reckoned that she didn't know how he missed her...